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****Calling Dottydot****

15 replies

Amanda1 · 25/07/2006 21:15

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Dottydot · 25/07/2006 21:52

Eek - my name on a thread title!!!! Awww - Amanda that's lovely - no, I didn't know who you were, but congratulations on coming out! . I'm really chuffed for you - are you out to family and friends at home or is MN the first (huge!) step? Did you talk to 1 of your friends about it - trying to remember the thread and I think you'd told a friend?! Anyway, that's wonderful and any time you want a chat I'm usually lurking!

And yes the wedding was fab - would do it all over again if I could!

Amanda1 · 25/07/2006 22:22

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Dottydot · 26/07/2006 15:57

Hi again,
I agree about it being tricky because it's your first relationship with a woman - but in a way it's almost easier to 'come out' when you're going out with someone- you don't need to use the words "I'm gay" - because that might not necessarily be the case anyway (I don't like boxes and labels!!), you can say something about being really happy at the moment because you're going out with someone and she's wonderful! Or something like that. Puts the onus on the person you've told to ask anything more or not. Even now after 14 years if I'm starting a new job I'll stick a photo of dp and ds's on the wall and just get it into a conversation - dp's my partner etc.etc. Much easier than the huge big "I'm gay" announcement..!

Anyway, take it at whatever pace you think is right - it'll all start to come together when you want to start introducing your girlfriend to other friends, and then eventually family (gulp!). And don't think you have to back yourself into a sexuality corner - I prefer the phrase 'flexible sexuality' myself (although dp would defnitely call herself a lesbian). Good job we're all different!

motherinferior · 26/07/2006 16:08
Grin
Carmenere · 26/07/2006 16:10

Dotty is that not dw now?

expatinscotland · 26/07/2006 16:12

carmenere just caught you out there, dotty!

Dottydot · 26/07/2006 16:13

Do you know, I've been thinking about whether to use 'dw'!!!! Feels toooooooo weird - a step too far!

FioFio · 26/07/2006 16:14

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Carmenere · 26/07/2006 16:16

Just had a look on Members profiles and your pic is gorgeous

FioFio · 26/07/2006 16:19

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Dottydot · 26/07/2006 16:23

I think it's less and less the case that you have to. Although bizarrely on the morning after the wedding when we'd checked out of the wondrous Malmaison hotel, dw (!) and I were walking to the bus stop holding hands - still in the wedding-lurve zone as it were - and we got to the bus stop and 2 small boys were giggling away and starting coughing whilst saying "lesbian" - thinking they were dead funny. They only looked about 9 or 10... Anyway, dp was a bit taken aback and offended - I was impressed they knew the word lesbian and saw it as a positive step forward!!

bundle · 26/07/2006 16:24

dd2 told me she had two mummies yesterday (one of her friends at nursery does, and I think she was a bit jealous )

Amanda1 · 26/07/2006 23:56

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Dottydot · 27/07/2006 10:50

that's good news Amanda! Try not to think of it all about having to broadcast anything - just think of it as dropping it into conversations as and when you feel it's right - a nice laid back approach!!

Amanda1 · 28/07/2006 08:25

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