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Original poster

Wedding seating plans and children, views please!

15 replies

pineneedle · 16/07/2006 21:48

A friend of mine is geting married next week with about 100 guests. She chose (rightly or wrongly!) not to invite anyone's children, but five couples have asked to bring theirs along. Mostly they have two each, ranging in age from about 1 to 8yrs. The tables will seat 8, so a fam of four would leave 4 places. Her dilema is whether to concentrate the families together, or whether to spread them out... any opinions please, more experienced wedding goers??!!

OP posts:

acnebride · 16/07/2006 21:52

tbh this is a nightmare. at my wedding there was more than one table of 3 distracted adults and 5 increasingly feral children. what fun they had [not].

I'd say that if any of the children can go into high chairs, to hire some (try yell.com for baby hire companies) so that you can have as near as possible a full complement of adults on the table.

for older kids, i'd try not to isolate them on a table of 7 adults.

sorry prob not much help. can she switch to a buffet!

MrsBadger · 16/07/2006 21:54

my vote goes to spreading them out but only among friends /relatives of the parents

MerlinsBeard · 16/07/2006 21:58

tbh if i had specified no children (which i will; NOT be doing) i wouldn't be bending over backwards to accomodate them. (yes, yes heartless cow etc etc) i would put them all on the same table(s) and make do.

tbh if shes going to say no children that should mean no children, what about the guests who have managed to get a sitter even though they wanted to bring their children?

(sorry, this gets on my nerves this subject!)

heiferjamese · 16/07/2006 21:59

I would put the families together... They will be more understanding of having children on their tables, than childless couples etc.

Xena · 16/07/2006 22:03

a cheek imo if there not invited. We have 4 dc's but even if we only had 2 I wouldn't expect them to be invited it doubles the number you have to invite I think its perfectly aceptable to only have your neices and nephews.

cat64 · 16/07/2006 22:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster

pineneedle · 16/07/2006 22:04

Thanks, you are all pretty much confirming what I said to her!

OP posts:

Original poster

pineneedle · 16/07/2006 22:06

(Mrs Badger, I don't think that many of the guests with children know many of the people going, IYSWIM)

OP posts:

Skribble · 16/07/2006 22:59

I would put them together furthest from the top table near the door for toilet and crying trips, purely from a practical point of veiw. I would group similar age kids together if possible.

If I had planned to invite them I would consider a breakout area with paper pens crayons etc.

I think it is perfectly fair not to invite kids if that is the type of function you want, if you are pre kids and close friends/ family don't have kids this would seem perfectly normal. We already had DS so he had pride of place at the top table as did the 6yr old bridesmaid.

puff · 16/07/2006 23:20

We invited children to our wedding. We had one long banqueting table which sat 100 people. Made sure guests were near people they knew and got the chance to meet new people. Children all mixed in to the melee. Everyone seemed to enjoy themselves.

lexiemum · 17/07/2006 07:21

who's picking up the cost for these extra 10 places?

is there enough room in the venue for another 2 tables?

i'd be really peeved if I was invited and had made arrangements for my children and to then find out others had bought theirs.

your friend needs to be assertive and say no but with a compromise that they can join after the meal for evening part if finding all day childcare is an issue.

if the parents then refuse the invite - upgrade some of the evening guests to all day and tell the families to just come in the evening with the kids.

at this late stage its too much work to plan for 10 children - the bride and family have enough to do this week without all this extra stress.

Coolmama · 17/07/2006 09:32

I would be really annoyed if I had specified no children and then people brought their kids - if you can't organise a babysitter, then politely decline the wedding invite - it's Fecking rude otherwise (sorry!) - but that's just me -
I think the best thing to do would be to put all the parents and kids at tables all together and make sure that the tables are near a door for easy access to loos, outside etc - and when the families with kids leave the wedding ( because of whatever reason ) the bride won't be left with gaping holes at other tables -
also I am sure that people who have made arrangements for their children will appreciate a child-free table for themselves.

expatinscotland · 17/07/2006 09:33

put the families together. outside, preferably.

expatinscotland · 17/07/2006 09:36

this is going to kick off.

Dottydot · 17/07/2006 10:04

We've got 14 children under 5 coming to our do on Saturday... The lunch is only at Pizza Express, but we've been relatively careful with the seating plan, putting families with young children who know each other together, and just 1 table is child-free - it's the one I really want to sit on - full of really interesting grown ups - I will be visiting it a lot!!

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