Setting up a babysitting circle - advice please!

[ponygirl]

I'm trying to set up a circle with a friend in my village and we've been working out basic rules to try and avoid as many pitfalls as possible. We've worked out: 1) 1 token per hour or part thereof (2 per hour after midnight); 2) children already to be in bed; 3) if cancelling less than 12 hours in advance, babysitter to be paid in full; 4) person booking to state coming-back time and babysitter to state latest they can stay.

Is there anything obvious we've missd out? There are bound to be teething problems but I'm hoping to avoid as many as possible. Oh, the things I will do for a social life!

What a good idea Ponygirl, wish there was something like that around here.

Hopefully we'll get lots of advice here and then you can set one up too!

[I hope you're having a better day today - will be back later when the hordes are in bed!]

I set one up when ds was born - it hasn't been very successful - we think you need a basic number of people to get it going, as we all feel a little embarassed about asking each other over and over.

If you would like a copy of all the paper work we came up with (our rules & consitution etc.) then contact me through "contact another talker"

Yes, I'm in one, have been since Dd was 6 months, she's now 8... years that is.
There are currently 8 of us. Everyone starts with 12 hours and spend/earn as you suggest. We don't have tokens but just keep a record book. We (the women) get together one a month for a chat and "to do the book." We record to the nearest half hour. going into double time after midnight. We don't do 2) and 3) in your list.
2) our children are now too old to do this, but they do tend to be in PJs altho' this isn't a rule.
3) With children, sometimes you can't cancel with more than 12 hours. It doesn't happen often. It is only a problem if the sitter cancels... where this has happened the sitter usually rings around the other members to find someone else.

I enjoy the babysitiing too. It's nice to sit and watch TV/read for the evening without thinking "I ought to iron,hoover/clean---".

One thing I would suggest is each doing a Help Sheet, include
mobile numbers
where clean bedding is kept
where clean PJs are
handy hints to settle those who wake (they always settle quicker if its done the same way as mummy/daddy)

When we started all the children were about 6 months, it was reassuring to go out knowing you were leaving your precious DD with someone who had a baby of the same age. It helped somehow. As they got older we realised that they didn't necassarily know the sitter. So we started family get-togthers. we now do a Christmas party and a summer picnic.

If I can be of any more help you can contact me through MN

Good luck

Around here there is a baby sitting circle and there are always issues. However the basic rules are

1. 1 point per 1/2 hr = 2 PH (you have up to 10 mins grace before midnight)
2. 1 point per 1/4 hr after midnight
3. kids other than your own should be agreed prior to sit
4. Partners can do sits if agreable to all parties
5. you can only hhave a balance between +15 and - 30.
6. You must leave out copious amounts of tea, coffee and chocolate biscuits A mobile phone number and instructions to use the TV (hopefully everyone will have satilite!!)

We have a bookholder which rotates every month, this means everyone has to have a go at the book and one person arranges sits for all that month. This means that is people need to sit (they have a negative balance) one person can ensure they are offered sits. Lastly I don't think you can insist all children are in bed before the sitter comes, TBH my kids go to bed between 7 and 8 and sometimes I need a sitter by 7. Since all the sitters are other mums and dads, I think it is acceptable to ask them to read a story and tuck them in (for younger ones) and to make sure they get themselves to bed (for older ones). Bear in mind how would that child feel if thet woke up and a stranger they had never met was there, but no mummy!!

Thank you for your responses!

Mummysurfer: I wonder whether we could ask for the sitter to do the ringing round for a replacement at short notice. Hmmm. The help sheet idea is excellent - we could draft a form for basic essentials to be completed every time.

Crunchie: I hadn't thought about allowing a minus figure, but having actual physical tokens to use it wouldn't be an issue: if you run out of tokens you have to work to get some more.
Must say, I too am really keen to babysit - seem to spend every evening at home doing the stuff I didn't do during the day and babysitting would be a good excuse to watch TV or read a book! Bit worried though that I don't have satellite

Thank you for your feeeback you wonderful mumsnet-people-you!

Hi there
I'm in a babysitting circle that has been running for years and years (I've been a member nearly 2 yrs). The 'rules' include the following:

1. Double tokens before 7pm and after 11.30
2. Younger kids to be in bed, older ones ready for bed and expected to put themselves in bed. Babies to be sleeping through the evening, but sitter may be asked to give a bottle. Sitter not expected to bath or read endless stories (one or two is acceptable!)
3. Male partners can sit but considered polite to check that its ok
4. Members get 15 hours of tokens and need to give these back if they leave.
5. We also have the monthly meet where most sits are expected to be requested and sorted out. We don't have any rule for cancellations, but I've only been stood up once or twice and for good reason - it works both ways, sometimes a sitter can't manage it and sometimes the person who booked the sit can't go out (illness usually). I think goodwill should operate here! The other thing you might want to consider is how you recruit more members. We have about 25 members, of whom about 10-15 are a core who actively request sits. Most people ask for and do about 2 sits/month - I think you need a large enough pool for it to work. New members are introduced by existing members every so often. I think it is a great idea - I've met lots of new people, get to go out regularly, and IT'S FREE!! If you want more detail please contact me.

Any more, please...?

I think this is a great idea. I'd be banned, though, because my children always have other ideas about bedtime when a babysitter is coming!

One tiny thing - one of our sitters always asks what time we'll be home, and although I always answer politely early, I feel like saying 'how the do I know? It depends how the evening shakes down!'

(I was a mammoth babysitter in my twenties before I had kids btw, so I'm not being unsympathetic).

I never tell my children when we're going out - is that really bad?!?! I work on the theory that if ds1 knew (5) he'd be much more likely to get up and try it on. They're such good sleepers (touch wood) and don't get out of bed (more touching wood!) I don't like to rock the boat by letting them know that we're not there and someone else (that they know) is.

No, I don't think that's bad ponygirl. My boys go to sleep well and never wake up. When he was small we tried explaining to ds1 that we were going out, and he got very upset and worked-up, and then wouldn't go off to sleep ... so we stopped trying. Now he is in bed, but not yet asleep when the babysitter comes; so we do bring him down to say hello, so he knows what's going on. DS2 is still in the realm of blissful ignorance as he is asleep, and stays asleep.

It's a judgement call. You may think your kids will be distraught if they wake up and you're not there. But if there's only a 0.5% chance they will wake up ...?!

We only have seven members in our group and it works perfectly well. When we started I worked out an order for each member of whom to contact first, second, third, etc. when requesting a babysitter. This way it ensures that we are generally even and forces people to go out. Good luck!

does anyone know how you handle the issue of parents possible wanting only certain members of the circle to babysit. Surely this is only human nature and one would not want to offend. I guess there must be some structure to the regular meetings, in organising sits, rather than a free for all, right?
easylife2