Babying a 3 year old - bad idea?

[KommandantColditz]

I have a 3 year old and an 8 week old. The 3 year old quite likes to pretend to be his baby brother, this involves me swaddling him, 'cootchi-cooing' for a while, then putting him down.

One of my friends thinks this is a bad idea, but I only see it as a game - not different to pretending to be anything. Am I wrong?

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I'm no expert and have only one child but our DS (nearly 3) often pretends to be a baby too. I'm sure its quite normal. I remember my neice doing similar things at 4 when her baby brother was born. Little ones are fascinted with babies anyway, but could be he just wants reassurance that you love him as much as his brother - I'd indulge him for a while, he'll find a new game in a few weeks anyway and will start to enjoy the responsibities of being a big brother.

It's a game. When he wants to do some 3yo thing and you say he can't do it because he's not old enough :) he might change his mind about being a baby - that is until he wants another cuddle (cos thats what the 8wkold sibling gets)
I don't think it's a problem unless it becomes a problem for you.

my 4 year old like to do this too, it's just play acting i don't see why it's a bad idea at all!

I think its perfectly natural and play-acting and not an issue

BUT

I have to say I dislike it when children pretend to be babies .. this is no doubt DS's fault .. because he hated imaginary play as a toddler .. but is great at it now he's 5 .. so because HE didn't do it .. it just seems wrong for other children to be doing it ... how stupid is that?

I think it's nice that you let him express this baby side and that indulging him will almost certainly means he grows out of it more quickly. He is exploring issues around whether you love the baby more and what it feels like to be a baby. I think you are doing exactly the right thing.

I know what you mean Twiglett about it being annoying or unsettling when children pretend to be babies, but I think we have a problem with the concept of children being dependent or immature in our society, hence people's dislike of extended breastfeeding / dummies / bedsharing etc. I know I have felt this way before myself, and I would think Colditz's friend is maybe tapping into that too.

i think it's a good thing to do when you have a new baby.if it was only the baby getting the cuddles and the coo chooing then he might feel left out.he's only 4 not 14.no harm at a ll.

I agree with everyone, ime it is a really healthy and normal thing to do and for sure it is just a game.
how's it going colditz?

Sorry for not getting back, I had to go out.

Yes, he is only just 3, so still a bit of a baby himself anyway, as he isn't a very mature 3, IYSWIM.

I'm not remotely worried about it, although it is beginning to grate a bit because he 'baby-whines' more than the baby does!

It's going ok thanks, HCC. Ds1 is painting in the garden and ds2 is discovering a baby gym I just bought in a charity shop for £1.75 - bargain! Starting to think about looking for a job (was made redundant in May) but there isn't much around here, so if I can't get one that's worth the hassle I shall do a night of shelf stacking or something.

Hi.
DD1 did this too.I think she just wanted to be reassured that she was still loved as much as she was before dd2 arrived.

She stopped it after a few months,but still LOVES me to talk about when she was 'a little baby',and keeps talking about the things she did,toys she played with or the clothes she wore.

I remember that she was very keen on me rocking her like a baby,just after dd2 was born,which always struck me as odd,because I've not really rocked either of them.

I think its fine,he's just using his imagination but pretending to be a baby rather than,say, a horse,which is dd1's prefered thing to be now.

When do you have to go back to work?Egerton Lodge were advertising last week I think.

If you fancy a coffee anytime-let me know.