howdy just an update - dont want to appear to up mi own arse.
so a while ago - 3 months or so - dh was losing his job end of contract - and spending all his time on pretend wizards at home on teh computer becuase he wasnt going into work - becuase it was the end of the contract and he worked on his own so no one gave a shit - and he was still being paid and we had this big to do becuae he wasn't finding a job and spending all his time with invisible wizards.
as you may know he got a job - 6 month contract. the contract has been extended to 3 years and he gets a very much needed pay rise as this was the only job going and he took a 4 - 5k pay cut to get a job. he is flourishing and everyone thinks he is the dogs bollocks and this is good for his ego
this in turn has lessened his dependency on invisible wizards and the obsession in in proportion with my mumsnet time - so all is good - most of the time.
thank you for all your support and advice it was uch appreciated i was one spit from kicking him out onhis arse. but everything is all good now. thnaks