Arrgh! Spare me from MIL's who 'mean well'!!

[TinyGang]

The road to hell is paved with good intentions - it is here anyway.

Mil kindly babysat for us last night. Great And that was all I asked her to do. We have 3 children - that's enough to keep anyone busy.

But wait! She has been a busy bee whilst we were out. She has taken it upon herself to 'sort out my washing'. Oh God.

Iknow Iknow she was only trying to help. But I so wish she wouldn't.

She thought the irorning pile was washing and has made some sort of illogical attempt at re-washing it. The remaining irorning pile now has dirty clothes mixed in with it. She has put the children's clothes away in all the wrong drawers including a wet swimsuit. I don't know what's where and keep getting snippets from the children about what else she got up to.

I am so and I know I sound ungrateful, but I don't feel comfortable with her doing this at all part of me feels she feels she must think I'm not doing a good enough job. It's going to take ages to re-sort it all.

aw. this made me smile. and - yes, it would probably wind me up too, but i'm sure it's not that she feels you're not doing a good enough job; she surely just wants to help you out a bit. perhaps next time you could say on you're way out "now, make sure you just put your feet up once the kids are in bed, and just leave that PILE OF IRONING over there - i'm going to do it tomorrow when i've got a spare half hour". that way she might get stuck in while you're out - then she gets to feel good about helping you out, and you've got your ironing done!

right in there with you over the sorting out washing

I live in my MIL"s house, a tiny house she hears every noise I make and I don't want to give her visuals with that by allowing her to sort my (dirty) washing. No. No way. NO!

Peanutbutter has put it brilliantly!
When i was young and prickly,the thought of someone 'helping out' drove me nuts.
Now i would weep with happiness if someone did my ironing and/or washing.

shucks thanks md . my MIL was a bit like this, totally meant well, but when i saw the results i'd feel a rush of irritation and affection and exasperation, and she could always tell she'd pissed me off a bit which made me feel worse of course...she once washed a beautiful wool jumper, something i treasured because and had cost a lot more than i usually spent on clothes. she shoved it in with the rest of the clothes and it came out looking like something an alien would wear!
she's not here any more and we miss her bitterly. i'd love to come home to her being with my ds, and see her face, even if she'd messed up my laundry

TinyGang - my mil used to interfere like this - with the best of intentions, I'm sure.

She cut down some plants in the garden that I'd just put in, did my dirty washing as I'd 'left it there' (while on holiday) and ruined a £40 pair of trousers etc etc.

Now we've got the boundaries sorted, she's a lovely mil.

Tinygang, hide it all next time she comes!

Oh I know - she is a lovely person, always trying to do a good turn etc. I feel bad to moan, especially when I hear about some mil's on here, but AAArghh just the same!!!

It's OK to moan without excusing yourself ! You know she meant well, BUT...Aaaaargh just the same ! Quite.

We went to mil's for lunch yesterday. Really hot here in the SE. Ds3 (nearly 2.5) doesn't "do" humid heat and has been a little whinge bag all week. Fine; he can't help it. We just try to keep him happy, coolish and hydrated, not worrying that he generally won't eat much until the cool of the evening arrives.
Will mil accept this? No; she hassled me all afternoon "Oh what's wrong with him?"
"er, as I said, he's just hot; he'll be fine. Please relax".
"Why won't he eat? What's wrong with him?"

"He's crying again. Why won't you give him something to eat ?"

"Are you hungry ? Is mummy not feeding you ?"

"He's a bit hot isn't he ?"

What can you do ?