17 month old keeps hitting other kids. What to do?

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Some mums say I should just ignore it, but I can't. If another kid was hitting my DS I would certainly expect the mum to intervene.

What I do when it happens is to remove him from the situation and make him look at me and tell him he musn't hit anyone. But he still does. Has anyone else experienced this and what did you do to stop it?

I wouldn't bother making him look at you - it's not a reliable sign that he is listening.

"no hitting" (keep it short so he can't tune out) and remove him. Say the no hitting whilst removing him so the cause and effect are quite clear.

Don't ignore - people will start threads about you

Deffo don't ignore

Be VERY firm and say "no hitting" and then give the other child some attention "are you OK?"/hug and then distract your son with a toy activity.

Tell him what to do, not what not to do. Something like hands down, or nice hands- at 17 months language is limited and negatives "no hitting" can be heard as "hitting". "Come here" is a good one as well. If it is a real problem- ie really happening all the time, I would also turn him away from me for 10 seconds.

At 17 months it can take a while to make progress.

I agree with jimjams, be very clear with him what you DO want him to do; take him away from the hit child with a firm 'No' and engage him with something else as soon as you can. Distraction will be a very good method; as others have said, do not ignore.

I wouldn't be afraid of taking him away out of the situation, either, if he is being impossible and you just can't seem to distract him. Take him for a minute out of the room, or in your car, or even take him home. There was a mum at my DS' playgroup who was a real, real terror with hitting other children...his mother never ignored it, always firmyl told him "No, you do not hit" etc etc...but that was all she did! If only she had distracted him more actively I'm sure he would have done better; and numerous times I thought to myself "I'd be on the way home in the car with my DS by now!"

I'm sure it won't get this bad for you though, just wanted to illustrate that ignoring and saying no just aren't enough with some kids...

Thanks you all. Great advice and will certainly try this tomorrow - we're going to a function where they'll be lots of other children.

I agree, just keep reinforcing the message. IMHO this is a toddler who naturally can't control his impulses yet because...ah...he's a toddler. Same thing with my ds who bit (mortifying). I picked him up and took him away from the other child (sort of "excluding" but for babies i.e. his fun was stopped), told him firmly not to do it, then made sure other child was okay. Thing is though, that didn't stop him biting. He only stopped when he was mature enough to control the impulse and think "I know I shouldn't do this".

So no overnight cure and he isn't necessarily being "bad" by still doing it. Sounds like you are doing all the right things and he will stop