I'm shocked and very very angry!

[Pfer]

DS1 is 4.4 and up until today I have NEVER been late to collect him from anywhere. I was at the doc's and they ran half an hour late and I got to the school about 30seconds after they let the kids out. I can't have been any later than this as a load of mums and kids were just coming out of the end of the little lane that leads to the kids entrance/exit. Running along with ds2 under my arm I stopped dead. There was ds1 standing at the end of the lane, next to the main road on his own. Unsupervised. They'd just let him walk off by himself! If I'd been a minute later god knows what he'd have done or where he'd have gone. I just grabbed him and stuffed him in the car and came home in a state of shock. I phoned the school and have spoken to his teacher who was very apologetic, but tbh that doesn't make me feel any better. Anything could've happened to him. I feel very let down, yes I should've been exactly on time, but they keep hold of all the other kids who's parents are regularly late, why couldn't they have held on to mine?

Pfer - this beyond bad. I am completely appalled at this and if my son's school did it I'm not sure how much grovelling would be enough. A full enquiry and a sacking might come close.
I'm sure it isn't even within the law for a school to do this. I'm so shocked about this, I'm slightly shaking on your behalf!!!

Urgent meeting with the head I think.

My goodness That is awful!!! How can the school allow a young child to wander off alone

I would have very strong words with the head!!

At my ds primary school they have to see their parent before the teacher lets them go. Up until age 6-7 I think.

I've tried to speak to the head but he's not available today that's why I got passed on to Ds's teacher. I'm going to write a strongly worded letter and take it in I think, not sure I can be trusted to speak as the more I think about it the angrier I'm getting.

I'm still shaking from the shock.

So very wrong, I would go down to the school and demand to see someone without a doubt.

At that age too they should be extra vigilant.

I'm not in anyway excusing the school here and very glad that your ds is fine.

but just wanted to point out that for a teacher standing at a school door with 30 odd children going in 30 different directions it is almost impossible for the teacher to ensure that each child matches a parent. You cannot look in every direction at once and when children see their mum they naturally go straight to them. if a child goes before parent arrives it is very difficult for a teacher to spot this every time. For this reason the children should be trained never ever ever to leave their teacher's side until they see their parent/carer.

Talk of sacking the teacher sounds a little OTT to me but a word with the school about tightening up procedures and a talk to the children about the rules sounds in order.

In a sense, the fact that you are always there has probably made them complacent.
I know it shouldn't!!

Pfer, you have my complete sympathy. My DS (2.7) ended up in the road about to step out from behind a parked van on his first day at nursery, it is a horrible shock. I would ring back and make an appointment with the head when he is available - probably a good thing that he's not today, better to go in with a clearer mind. Decide exactly what you think needs to be done to make sure the situation doesn't happen again and go in with these suggestions. DS's (ex)nursery immediately changed their picking up procedure so it can't happen again (having said that they nearly had a similar incident a few years ago, so I'm not completely sure they will learn from their mistakes.)Hope you start feeling a bit better very soon.

Shimmy, just to say there are 12 kids in DS's class and there is only one way in and out, and the teacher stands by the gate watching people collect their kids. So to me there is no excuse.

Shimmy21, sorry but they have a duty of care that doesn't just magically end when the clock strikes going home time. They DO have to keep an eye on every child leaving - of course they do!!!!! Of course they do. This is very very serious IMO, and the teacher concerned should get a bollocking at least, from the head.

No Pfer, you're right it's not an excuse. But I just wanted to point out that it is impossible for teachers to be as vigilant for a large group of children as we are for our own children. Just the law of numbers and the number of eyes we have in our heads mean it is impossible, however well intentioned and thorough the school is. All sorts of things happen as children leave the school (someone forgets something, loses their lunch box, parents always want to have a quick word about their holiday or whatever etc etc). You said that other chuildren are held back in school if the parents are late so it sounds like this time was a genuine mishap rather than a general slapdash attitude on the part of the school. The only answer for everybody is to try to teach our own children to behave safely (easier said than done)

Shimmy, I happen to think you're bonkers. Being 30 odd seconds late does not mean the school can just let the kids wander off! Jesus! Having 3 people supervising the pick-up of 12 kids means that none of the kids should be allowed to get into that situation doesn't it?

When it comes to the welfare of children at school 'genuine mishaps' shouldn't happen!

I didn't mean to suggest that the school should let him pfer.

I've just emailed the head making a simple suggestion that would prevent this happening again, it'd just mean one of the teachers or an assistant coming out about a minute before the children to let the parents into the waiting area, which is there for when you drop your kids off, so you can see them walking into school but don't go in with them (I still go with DS as he's in pre-reception and just a little dot yet). That way whoever was supervising would be able to stand by the gate and watch everyone leave and make sure all kids had a parent/carer with them. Don't know why they don't do it like this already really.

As a TA in pre-reception I can tell you shimmy that this really shouldn't happen. I do not let a child out of the door until I see the parent standing in the waiting area. I let them out one at a time and I take no notice of tut tutting from other waiting parents who think I'm being slow at letting the children out . I have 20+ children to be responsible for so I do it properly.

As a TA in pre-reception I can tell you shimmy that this really shouldn't happen. I do not let a child out of the door until I see the parent standing in the waiting area. I let them out one at a time and I take no notice of tut tutting from other waiting parents who think I'm being slow at letting the children out . I have 20+ children to be responsible for so I do it properly.

oops!!

exactly!

This is awful ! At my dd's school you have to be seen before they will release your child ! I spend ages bobbing up and down so that the teacher can see me through the tiny windows of two doors and along a long corridor.

There is no way this should have happened !

I completely disagree with shimmy - there can never be any exceptions for letting this happen. It happened to ds when he was in reception and I was told my mnetters that I shouldn't have been 1 min late (it was the first time ever). The school has a responsibility to look after your child while in their care and saying he just slipped out in a busy moment is far from acceptable imo.

Look here people. I am not saying it is acceptable. I am not saying it is excusable. I am not saying that the school should not seriously reconsider their way of handling the end of the day (your email to them sounded excellent by the way pfer).

I am saying simply that whether we like it or not, as unacceptable as it is, this sort of thing can happen and that the best prevention is training our children not to leave their teacher. Surely that is not so very bonkers???

Shimmy
I do feel strongly (as you can probably tell!) that there is a clear duty of care here, but that is a good point. Maybe just to be on the extra safe side, we could also tell our children never to slip out, or leave unless they see us.
That could be a belt and braces approach, so to speak. But responsibility overall is still really up to the school.

cupcakes . You were a minute late, I was about 30 seconds, and first (and last) time for both of us. Just shows that you can't afford any cock-ups, like accident detours, late doctors, breakdowns etc doesn't it. TBH I doubt I'll leave the village now while DS is at school till he starts full time in September. It's sad but I don't feel I can trust them to take care of him properly anymore. If I was late again I'd be petrified that it'd happened again and that he'd be lost.

Shimmy, tbh I don't think it's even excusable. Things like this shouldn't happen. Fairyjay said maybe they were complacent as I've always been there before (I'm usually about 10mins early) and they just didn't expect me not to be. Out of interest would you still find it excusable if a child had been abducted or run over after just being able to wander off by themselves? I wouldn't.

Oh and DS is 4.4 and has been at school precisely 3 weeks. He's not yet grasped the idea that he shouldn't leave his teacher unless he see's me, he just looks for me. I am 'training' him to do this, but it's not instant and the kids need to be safe before they understand this properly don't they?