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Original poster

Am I wrong to let ds give up ballet classes?

20 replies

cupcakes · 05/05/2006 11:48

He has been going for over a year (he is almost 6). He started because his 2 best friends are girls and he wanted to join them. This year he has become better friends with boys in his class (who are all into football) and he has become embarrassed about his ballet lessons and now wants to give up.

I am quite happy for him to stop, especially if it is troubling him at school (I don't know if anyone has ever said anything to him about it) but he still seems to enjoy the lessons.
Should I encourage him to perservere with his peer group and their opinions or shall I let him give up. I considered giving him till the summer holiday and letting him stop (or reconsider) then but I just don't know what would be best. He doesn't actually like football so this is the only physical activity he does.

OP posts:

Micku5 · 05/05/2006 11:58

My dd currently goes for tiny tots ballet and i would for her to continue as long as possible.

I recently went to a dance(school) company show which was excellent. There were young boys in the beginner ballet classes and then some slightly older boys (9+) and teenagers who showcased their street dancing/modern

When I looked on the schools website afterwards it was interesting to read that they 'believe that all our students should take ballet class as this is the foundation for all dance forms...modern, jazz, street and breakdancing'

Micku5 · 05/05/2006 12:00

Just reading that back, i realise that it didn;t answer your question.. but you could say that if he wants to dance like "insert pop icon/band name here" then he should carry on with his ballet?

lionhearted · 05/05/2006 12:05

Difficult one--but could you substitute the ballet for something that includes dance alongside other activities?

Original poster

cupcakes · 05/05/2006 12:20

I should say that his dance school did a big performance at a large theatre last year which he was in (for about 5 mins!). It involved several long rehearsals which he didn't enjoy but when it came to the show he was sooo enthusiastic. The look in his face when I collected him was amazing - he described it as 'wonderful'. He does seem to love the dancing which was why I was surprised when he said he wanted to stop.

OP posts:

joelalie · 05/05/2006 12:25

My DD went through almost exactly the same thing a few years back. She loved the classes and was excited about the show but the rehearsals were exhausting and by the end she HAD HAD ENOUGH!!! And nothing I said persuaded her to go back. Now she says she'd like to try again so maybe we'll try but as she blows hot and cold on things like this I'm proceeding cautiously. Lots of her friends from school are going so that's influencing her.

I really don't think you can force a child to continue with anything. Perhaps you could let him take a break for a while and see how he feels then?

Fimbo · 05/05/2006 12:37

Does his dance school just do ballet, Cupcakes? The school my dd is at also do tap and modern/acrobatic. My dd does all three disciplines and really enjoys it. There are a few boys in her classes but most of them seem to have given up on ballet and just do the modern/acro bit. They performed at the Theatre Royal 2 weeks ago and it was a lovely performance.

Congratulations on the pg btw

foxinsocks · 05/05/2006 12:40

if he really doesn't want to do it, I'd let him stop. I let dd stop ballet last year - she regretted it for a bit but she wasn't enjoying it any more.

Is there anything else he'd like to do like swimming?

Original poster

cupcakes · 05/05/2006 12:40

Thanks. I think I'm only just 7 weeks so trying not to get too excited yet - hence no huge announcement.

His school is only ballet unfortunately as are all the other local classes. Does your dd go to a school in your village or the one in Wymondham?

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secur · 05/05/2006 12:42

TBH, I would say that if you make him go he will ersent you and it for being forced on him IYSWIM, I would be tempted to let him stop but have a good chat with him along the lines of he can start again if he wants and that just because his friends don't do it does not mean he can't etc etc.
My dd had similar (but reversed) with kickboxing - she is excellent at it, but it is a "boys" sport. She stopped but is now showing an interest again as she thinks her friends are worng - and she has just started Rugby too so I think she is taking an in for a penny in for a pound approach

Original poster

cupcakes · 05/05/2006 12:42

fox - swimming would be a good alternative and I would look into him doing that instead. One of the reasons he doesn't do it at the moment is that he's already got enough after school activities for my liking!
My only hesitation is that he will miss it. Also, his sister goes to the classes now so I'll still have to drag him along with me to the classes anyhow.

OP posts:

Original poster

cupcakes · 05/05/2006 12:43

secur - I think you're right. I'll have another talk with him at the weekend.

OP posts:

milward · 05/05/2006 12:45

Give him a breather - would gym be a good option to keep his skills in dance?

Fimbo · 05/05/2006 12:45

In my village, it wouldn't take that long for you to get here though. I think the class would probably be at 5.30 on a Friday (don't quote me though!). There are 2 dance schools in Wymondham iirc - Judith Fox on Tuttles Lane (but maybe ballet only) and at Ketts Farm Community Centre (beside the police h.q.). I can you email you the details of my dd's school if you are interested.

secur · 05/05/2006 12:45

CC - you managed to work out what ersent means then?

I must preview more lol!

Original poster

cupcakes · 05/05/2006 12:50

Fimbo - thanks but now that I've remembered about dd and her classes he's going to have to stick to the same school or it's going to be a major pain.
I wish I knew if his friends have teased him about it or whether he was just feeling self concious. I think I am going to let him have a break. Will talk to the teacher tomorrow.

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Fimbo · 05/05/2006 12:52

Maybe if you let him have a break - he will realise he misses it, especially as you have to go there anyway with P. Good luck, it is always hard to know what to do for the best. I have just let my dd give up swimming lessons as she hated them and was starting to invent illnesses every Saturday morning - she now has swimming at school and is much, much happier.

Fimbo · 05/05/2006 12:54

I found out why she hated swimming lessons though - it was because they had to swim in the deep end and at school they swim in the shallow end - by being in the shallow end it has upped her confidence lots. So maybe it is just something simple that is praying on your ds's mind.

Fimbo · 05/05/2006 12:55

Shame you are not coming over here though - eek we could have met at long last!!

Original poster

cupcakes · 05/05/2006 12:57

OP posts:

LizP · 05/05/2006 20:13

ds1 and ds2 but did ballet and tap last year - but ds1 decided to give up after his pre-primary exams so ds2 decided he didn't want to go either. ds1 was pretty talentless so don't think he would have been allowed to take this summers exams anyway! They got teased a bit at school but I think they were just bored by it and didn't like the discipline. They now do a dance/drama/singing thing that they really enjoy - much more showing off allowed. They do gymnastics too - maybe that might suit your ds ?

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