Should I take dds with me?

[kando]

My sister's baby is due mid-April (yay, going to be an auntie for the first time!!!), and myself and my other sister want to go up to see her and the baby a couple of weeks after it's born. My pg sister, mum and dad etc live in Scotland, I and other sister live in South England, so we don't really see the family very often.

Bearing in mind that sis will just have had baby, do you think it would be selfish of me to take my 2 dds (aged 3 and 1) up to Scotland to see the baby and rest of the family? DH has suggested just taking my eldest dd, but I can't bring myself to leave dd2 behind. It would be both dds or neither.

(Haven't seen family since I last went up with dds in August, and not likely to be going up to Scotland this year unless we go up for Christmas. My folks have not come down to see us since October 2002, so not holding out much hope of a visit from them this year!)

What would you do - go by yourself or take your kids?

PS: Have never had a night away from dds since dd1 was born, which means that dh has never looked after them on his own for a whole weekend.

Where do you intend to stay? If you're not going to be staying with your sister then imo I think it would be alright to take both dds. A word of warning though, a friend of mine brought a young toddler to visit me and my newborn dd and it was a nightmare. I was tired and the toddler didn't stop. Her mother was constantly up and down and saying "no". I was very stressed by the time they left

Well Kando there is a first time for everything! Maybe he should have a go now!

I do remember when dd was born hating it when friends with toddlers came round as I could only just cope with dd and it really stressed me having them running around and into everything when I was trying to have a lovely calm environment (god how selfish does that sound!) But selfish or not I think people can feel fragile after the first birth so it would probably be kinder to her to leave your dds at home.

PLUS - don't you want a break after 3 years, just think you could have a lie in, have a few drinks, talk to your sister without constant attention seeking etc.

On the other hand if they are not going to see the family other than on this visit maybe you should all go - where do you stay, with your parents? If so then surely dh can stay there with dds and look after them while you are over at your sisters, you could just take them once to see the new baby etc.

How funny that babybags and I both found it stressful - I think it is actually

Thanks for the advice ladies - the stress thing was what was worrying me. My sis probably wouldn't be that bothered about it, but I most certainly would be! It's now been decided that dh is going to look after both dds whilst I go on a jolly to Scotland with my other sister and bond with our new niece/nephew (Can't wait for a lie in on a Saturday morning either!)

Have a great time (she's says through gritted teeth very envious!) :0