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Original poster

Stupid husband I am fuming

41 replies

eddm · 13/01/2004 23:50

Just caught my not-very-d h leaving our baby on the bed while he came downstairs to get something from the kitchen! The cot is right next to the bed, for heaven's sake, but too much trouble to put baby in that, obviously. I am soooo angry don't care if it is a large bed and baby was in the middle, it's still wrong. And dh knows it. Which is why he is sulking, of course. Anyone else have an equally stupid dh or dp? Or is it just mine?

OP posts:
nutcracker · 13/01/2004 23:57

My mom works on a maternity unit and you wouldn't believe the things some people do with their babies, like leave them on edge of bed, go to have a fag and return 3 hours later, and the worst one, dropping baby on head, although the poor woman was knackered and fell asleep holding baby.

Original poster
eddm · 13/01/2004 23:59

sorry, I had to laugh at the poor woman who fell asleep, could have been me! perhaps I won't be so cross with dh in the morning...

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nutcracker · 14/01/2004 00:01

Is it your first baby ??? I would forgive in the morning then. If not first baby then he should know better

Original poster
eddm · 14/01/2004 00:06

yes, and likely to be only baby at this rate I have spelt this out to dh before when he's walked out of the bedroom (but only to cupboard on the landing). Just can't believe he left the room and came downstairs! But will try very hard to be grown up and not snap at him tomorrow.

OP posts:
nutcracker · 14/01/2004 00:07

He would be amazed at how quickly a baby can roll off a bed.

Original poster
eddm · 14/01/2004 00:11

Just remembered years ago my dad dropped my sister on her head when he forgot to hold on while carrying her on his shoulders.. so maybe it's a male thing?

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nutcracker · 14/01/2004 00:12

Well yes, that's probably true. How old is baby ???

bobthebaby · 14/01/2004 00:41

eddm, my husband left ds in the bath to get a towel and then decided to tidy up some nappies while he was there. I was speechless and then found my voice would only emit swear words.

Two days ago our ds (10.5 months) didn't crawl at all, today he moved across an entire room and tried to eat a plant. You don't get any warning signs with babies sometimes and you are right to be cross. Having come down stairs it would be easy for your dh to get further distracted and maybe sit down in front of the TV and forget entirely that he had left baby on the bed. Especially if s/he is little and you are both tired. He is only sulking because he is cross with himself.

Chandra · 14/01/2004 01:28

Dh is great with DS but... he had suggested a couple of times to leave DS (10m) alone sleeping at his cot while we go to visit the neighbours!!! he insists that we could still hear the monitor but what irritates me the most is that he is totally unable to understand why his suggestion drives me mad!!!

zebra · 14/01/2004 02:22

My dad left me on a carseat, door open, when I was 6 months old and I rolled out hitting concrete face first...Hasn't affected me, though! Nope.... er, what were we talking about??

hmb · 14/01/2004 07:07

We call it 'a mummy/daddy' thing in our house. Dh is great with the kids, but what he can do is think, if I leave the baby then s/he might do X and might end up doing Y that might lead to Z and a trip to casulty. He can't think through what 'might' happen. And it is 'can't', because he is a very caring and hard working dad. I think his brain is just wired up in a different way.

Original poster
eddm · 14/01/2004 08:40

Thanks everyone it helps to know I'm not alone. And I have managed to talk to him this morning without snapping. DS is 6 months old on Friday and he is rolling over occasionally.

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marialuisa · 14/01/2004 09:31

Just to put your DH in a more positive light: when DD was 10m old I came home from work very late (about 9pm) as i'd been on a trip out of town. Imagine my shock to see DH strolling down the road towrds me on his way to the off-licence. He'd left DD asleep in her cot....He maintained I was neurotic for a good few weeks after.

Angeliz · 14/01/2004 09:42

lo at Zebra
addm, i remember one time dp was getting dressed downstairs and dd was very small on the settee, i jus have the image od dp with jeans half pulled on diving for the baby who had already hit the floor!
Saying that she did roll off the bed also when she was little and i WAS in the room with her

Angeliz · 14/01/2004 09:45

i understand your frustration thoug as dp and i have VERY different views about things like concrete steps, he's been known to say,"it's the way she'll learn",(better now she's older but used to drive me CRAZY!

aloha · 14/01/2004 09:45

Angeliz, snap! I was at the MIL's getting dressed when it happened. Both dh and the MIL came racing up the stairs as the sound of baby rolling off bed and hitting floor reverberated through the house. He was fine, honest....so far...

GenT · 14/01/2004 09:48

I can understand your feelings eddm and it is not only yours. I think they are a bit too casual about what baby can do and when they start moving. Besides I think they don't think at times, erm mine doesn't sometimes esp. when he is tired.

I was in the kitchen on Christmas day getting breakfast. Next thing I heard some loud wailing. I had left them both in bed. In lovely dh's care, he fell asleep knowing she could crawl away and does wander around in the bed. This time she fell off, I think it was flat on her face. Didn't cry too much after she saw me, probably more the shock of falling and it hurt a bit frightened her.

I should add she does fall at times but if it is not extreme, we don't make a fuss over it and she grimaces for a second and continues on her adventure. She is a tough little thing now.

I wanted so much to yell all the words in the bad dictionary to him, create some if I didn't know them all, but I didn't. He would have ended up acting like I am the one in the wrong because he knows I would be correct. Not right otherwise I would be called Mrs. Right, first name Always.

I think I should let him read this thread to see how he got off lightly.

motherinferior · 14/01/2004 09:48

BTW eddm, I still haven't had your email!

Original poster
eddm · 14/01/2004 10:03

MI, it got bounced back, message that you've opted not to be contacted via the site? You can email me via the site if you like...

OP posts:
motherinferior · 14/01/2004 10:33

No, I was told YOU didn't want to be contacted via the site when I emailed you! I'll contact the site, dammit!

motherinferior · 14/01/2004 10:37

I have de-ticked a box I may have ticked by mistake, and emailed. Try again...

lailag · 14/01/2004 10:40

Last sunday dh and dd (9mo) were supposed to be together upstairs while I was downstairs..well, I saw dd was also on her way downstairs;I just managed to catch her before she was sliding down further.
dh comments: she was with me just a second ago how can she have gone to the stairs so quickely???

katierocket · 14/01/2004 10:48

think hmb's description of man's brain not being able to think that way is very good.
My DP is fantastic dad but he just thinks I'm over neurotic about DS (2 yr).
Some examples of what I think are common sense and he thinks is me "wrapping DS in cotton wool"

-not using fire guard when fire is on "he knows not to go near it" - but what about if he tripped?!
-leaving matches within reach!! (actually I think that was an accident but when i queried it he rolled his eyes back, like "what's he going to do - blow himself up" - errr..yes!)
-standing right on the edge of a waterfall on a slippy, wet rock. WHen it was 30ft drop into rapids
-letting DS walk on his own (i.e. not holding hand) by really busy road

He is the most caring, loving dad but sometimes he can be so dim!

katierocket · 14/01/2004 10:49

should have said - the waterfall one was because he had DS in a back carrier while he was standing there.

Original poster
eddm · 14/01/2004 11:16

MI, now I can't get into my email! But will check later...

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