What would you get for someone who lost almost everything (material stuff nobody got hurt thankfully) in a house fire?

[MrsBigD]

Haven't know her very long but we're penpals and she lives a few hours away. Hadn't heard in a while but got a letter today saying that they had to move as their house burnt down and what didn't go up in smoke was damanged by the water...

they have a little boy who is the same age as my dd, but won't be able to 'hand down' clothes has a) he's a boy and b) dd is tiny and he's big for his age.

What would you give as a care packet?
What ARE the basics? shame on me for not knowing but as with many things one doesn't know what's amiss until it's amiss...

Thanks for any suggestions

Depends how much you want to spend. I know it's not a basic, but could you possibly afford some kind of camera for them? If they lost all their photos, they might want to start taking new ones of their ds. I know that it would be the loss of photos that would hit me hardest.

Practical things: duvets, pillows, sheets etc. New sandwich box for ds for school?

God, the more I think about it, the more awful it must be - where do you start?

I would probably get something for her. If she's a typical mum/wife, she's probably got something for everyone else and very little for herself.

I'd offer money. It's more useful than anything else at a time like that.

Offer to restock her makeup bag? I know it sounds trivial but getting your hands back on your standby foundation, mascara and lippy can make a big difference in how you face up to a crisis.
And, also, hopefully, they had both buildings and contents insurance? What an awful thing to happen, at least they are all safe and well.

I was just thinking that FIS. If they are in temp accommodation I bet she has sorted her son and her partner and left herself bottom of the list. Favourite perfume and or/bubble bath? BIG bar of chocolate?

I'm with anorak I think - money/vouchers to help get basics of their own choosing until the insurance pays out would be perfect.

Other thoughts are - a care package of cheap little toys/books for her boy to tide him over until he has some new toys? Just pocket money type stuff to call his own really.

Must be horrible :(

Hopefully they had insurance and ultimately that will cover to replace all that is replacable. I second the personal touch for her, can you also pass along some of dd's toys (even if just on loan). TBH I would phone her and see what you can do to help.

Money or vouchers, as you dont know what has been replaced so far, or what other friends/family will get them.

thanks for all your input.

Chicagomum... I don't have her number! :(

As I don't know what kind of makeup she wears I think I'll send her some boots vouchers or the like :)

Like the lunchbox idea ... got to go and grab one tomorrow especially as he just started school!

Again it depends how much you want to spend but I'd phone and ask. But also I'd buy a really nice photo album, then write a note about how although you'll never be able to replace the photo's shes lost that she might want to start a new one to take photos of the most precious things that she was lucky enough to keep (her dp and ds) then put the note in the first page of the photo album. Did she ever send you a picture of her son when he was born? maybe you could include that on the first page as well.. if she's updated you with the odd photo here and there of him, you could send them all..

MDB very nice thought. Unfortunately we haven't know each other for all that long :) so I have no photos of her little boy at all :(

But please all keep the ideas coming :)

Last year my next door neighbours house burnt down and they lost everything apart from the clothes they stood up in.

They appreciated clothes, shoes and toiletries things that they needed immediatley.

Something you could do is photocopy and send to her any copies of letters you have sent to her in the past - or any letters/cards she sent to you. Or copies of any photos of her/you. It's the things that cannot be replaced that have sentimental value which are so sorely missed.