Please help me find the words to sort out my dilemna over kindly person sending DS money....

[Squarer]

Or as good as money anyway.....
A friend of the family sent us an Easter card saying how sad she was that DS had been poorly and hoped that the enclosed would buy some Easter Treats for him. The enclosed was a cheque for £25 which in no way can she afford. We destroyed the cheque.
Dilemna is, she is so sweet and I am going to send her a thank you (as this will mean a lot to her) but how do I tell her that we are not going to cash her cheque - very kind of you blah blah, but as you are a raging pauper etc etc. It's not going to happen. Her financial status is linked to mental illness - if anything DS should be sending her a cheque. It's a nightmare.
What would you say?

Why mention it? If she is not really rational about money etc. then she will probably never notice that it has not been cashed.

Sorry but I think it is wrong not to cash a cheque that someone has sent as a gift, although you mention mental illness?

I wondered that MP.

Socci - this is a long long standing problem. We know her situation and there is no way she can afford this - she just wants to be kind - but so do we. She is on a financial knife edge.

oh I see - that is tricky I guess. Is there someone a bit closer to her (like a sister or something) who you could approach and ask to have a word with her?

Hi There
When my Grandad sends the odd cheque here and there i never cash 'em and i don't think he notices...perhaps your friend won't notice.

Perhaps just say thank you and that you all had a lovely Easter, and gamble she doesn't notice it's not been cashed? If I read your implications correctly, it's unlikely stop her sending them in the future, so not much point upsetting her now.

I have been cheques under similar circumstances and always just say thankyou and hope they don't notice.

I have been sent cheques

I wouldnt mention it and if she does ask in the future just lie and say you are sure you cashed it.

Socci - she has a son but we don't know him.
I think you are all right - I'll just thank her and avert my gaze....
Cheers