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Original poster

peopl.e comments on having one of each sex/two or more of the same etc?

49 replies

myermay · 11/04/2006 11:45

Sorry need to spout! i've got two boys and get sick of people saying,
would you like anymore?
i say yes, but not yet, want to enjoy these whilst they are so young
they then say, well it's be nice to have a girl!

arghhhh, i get so cross, people obviously don't think b4 they speak and too me (perhaps i'm being to sensitive), it makes me feel like my boys aren't as wonderful as what girls are.

I recently found out that a friend has just had a boy (she already has a girl), told a relative and they said, oh how lovely to have one of each. I'm one of 4 girls and so far i've got 2 boys and so has my sister and already i've got my mum & grandmother saying, wouldn't it be nice to have a girl in the family! ffs, you've had 4 girls, you'd think they'd be exstatic about having lots of boy around.

I also had a friend recently say that she didn't want anymore kids as she has one of each, but could understant why i might want more as i've got 2 boys, and could try for a girl. Yes, i'd like a girl but something equally appeals to having 3 boys.

Don't know if this knarks me so much because i would like a girl but just so i can buy pink clothes and hopefully have that mother/daughter realtionship that i've got with my mum. But boys can be equally close to their mums can't they?

Sorry to ramble, i just get sick of it and think that i'm lucky to even be able to have kids.

Anyone have any tips to shut these people up?

OP posts:

NotAnOtter · 12/04/2006 17:22

will you go again tallulah ( just to add to annoying people saying things) /?

SomethingAboutMary · 12/04/2006 17:27

I am with twiglett we have one of each sex & everyone is always saying oh well you won't need to have anymore now, even my doctor & midwife said this to me.....

hunkermunker · 12/04/2006 17:28

Tell them you're allergic to pink junk.

Or that you're worried you'd leave a girl out on a hillside.

Or that you don't like girls because you are one and you're a nasty bitch.

I've used all of these since having DS2

Some people just have to comment don't they?!

NotAnOtter · 12/04/2006 17:29

fantastic hunker!

Enid · 12/04/2006 17:33

I have two girls and get the same commnetss

in fact if this db3 is a girl I think my PILs will wear black for a few months

robin3 · 12/04/2006 17:34

Totally agree and there have been numorous previous threads on this very subject so it's true to say that it's an epidemic.

Boys are GREAT and I wouldn't have it any other way.

The older generation seem to feel it's a tragedy to have no girls and it makes you wonder if the men of our generation were damaged by being so stereotyped by their parents.

Enid · 12/04/2006 17:36

girls are fab though

NotAnOtter · 12/04/2006 17:39

sadly we live in a girl - centred culture ! Us boy weighted families will have our reward when all the girls hit 13!

Jasnem · 12/04/2006 17:41

It really doesn't make any difference if you've got girls or boys. Once you've got more than one people assume if you have any more it's solely because you want the other. I have 2 dds, and am constantly having to resist the temptation to scream at total strangers who tell me I must be so happy to have "got" a boy this time.

sweetkitty · 12/04/2006 18:05

Yes I can completely sympathise on this one having had DD2 recently. Worst one is my mother who is in her words "one of only two in the family to hit the jackpot ie a girl and a boy" and another cracker " a woman is not a real woman until she has carried a boy" I kid you not! So as you can tell DD2 has been somewhat of a disappointment in her eyes (maybe why she hasn't made the same fuss over DD2's birth and has only seen her once) oh and I'm allowed to have another baby to try for a boy like I wouldn't be allowed if I had one of each.

Where does this perfect one of each come from and why do people feel the need to comment on the sex of children when you get what you are given?!

God it makes my blood boil!

NotAnOtter · 12/04/2006 18:09

She is probably jealous Sweet!

collision · 12/04/2006 18:09

THIS MAKES MY BLOOD BOIL!

I am one of 5. 2 girls and 3 boys.

I have 2 boys. Bro1 has a boy. Bro2 has 2 boys. All healthy and happy.

But..............my parents want a gdaughter. And tell us. What the hell is that all about? Bro1 is having another in Sept and has already been told 'it had better be a girl!'

Why can they not just be happy that they have beautiful healthy grandsons? I had to find out that ds2 was a boy because if anyone had said to me 'what a shame' about having another boy I would have hit them or sworn at them.

This really peeeeeeeeeeees me off!

Rant over.

collision · 12/04/2006 18:14

And a stupid woman (who had 2 girls) once said to me that 'every woman wants a daughter!' WTH?

I should have replied that maybe 'her husband would have liked a son.' But I didnt because I wouldnt want to have upset her.

Some people.

Goldfish · 12/04/2006 18:23

I am one of 4 girls. My sister has 1 girl 2 boys, I have 2 boys, my next sister has 2 boys and my youngest sister has 1 boy. My parents had 4 daughters, then the first grandchild was a girl and the next 7 were grandsons. We all think its great. They range from the girl at 18 to the youngest boy at 2 and they are all really close. My mum reckons she had the best of both worlds, with her girls and all our boys. We wouldn't change it for the world.

NotAnOtter · 12/04/2006 18:30

Lovely gold! I was one of four girls ( my mum desperate for boys) and i have had 4 boys! I think its rare to hear positive things about boys - we need to 'big them up' a bit!

blueteddy · 12/04/2006 18:34

I find these comments quite irritating too. I am very proud of my 2 boys & will not be having any more children, but when people ask if I am having any more & I say "No" they often then follow on with "Oh, no little girl?"
I would never get pregnant just to try for a certain sex & it is not like if you had another you would have the opposite sex anyway!
I remember talking to one of my neighbours just after I had DS2. She had a DS followed by a DD & said (knowing I had just had my second DS) "I asked straight away at the scan if she was a girl, because I thought knowing my luck it would go & be another boy!"
I would just tell them that you love little boys & would be very happy to have a third.

NotAnOtter · 12/04/2006 18:37

imo people just would not say these things to solely girl centred families...maybe i am over sensitive but i think people think 'boy-mums' are insensitive women. We have feelings too - we just gave birth to boys!

Avalon · 12/04/2006 18:40

I have 3 dd's and frequently get the 'oh, no boy?' type of comment.

Also, to dh, 'shame you haven't got a son'.

NotAnOtter · 12/04/2006 18:42

it will just be me being hyper sensitive Avalon

Avalon · 12/04/2006 18:48

dustanyone · 12/04/2006 23:22

I had 2 dss first then got pregnant with my dd.

Nobody said much while I was pregnant but now she is at playgroup peole comment on how I don't need to have anymore now I have my dd as if the boys aren't wanted!

Janh · 12/04/2006 23:34

I had 2 DDs and then a DS; when I got pg again nobody could think of anything cliched to say so they didn't bother (which was nice!)

Linnet · 13/04/2006 00:13

I have 2 girls and people have asked if we'll be trying for a boy? NO. Does your husband not want a son? NO. and comments like every man should have a son.

My granny said to me when dd2 was a few weeks old, she should have been a boy then you'd have had one of each. ?!?!?

To be honest having had dd1 I secretly wanted another girl as dd1 was desperate for a baby sister and I felt I knew what I was doing with girls. But, if DD2 had been a boy I would have been equally delighted with my new baby and I know that dd1 would have been equally delighted with a baby brother. There were complications during the pregnancy and all that really mattered to Dh and I was that we had a healthy happy baby at the end of a not so great pregnancy.

wessexgirl · 13/04/2006 00:27

I've 2 girls and would love a third. Although I told myself at the scan for dd2 'I don't really mind either way' in my heart of hearts I wanted another girl. When dd2 was born, was almost hysterical with relief she was a girl. I hope I'd have loved a boy the same, but can't guarantee it.

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