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Anyone lost interest in their career

96 replies

kizzie · 06/01/2004 18:54

Hi everyone
Ive always been ambitious, loved my job and been lucky to carry on working part time in a fairly senior position after my children were born.

They are four now but recently I really seem to have lost interest in my job.

I suffered from PND which I got over although Ive had a difficult time recently because unfortunately I became addicted to seroxat and have been trying to come off for 2 years.

Anyway only reason to mention that is because Ive carried on working throughout yet recently its really starting to get to me.

Im finding the work load more and more demanding and increasingly resent the extra work I need to do at home. i have fewer ideas while im there and find the every day problems that crop up really irritating.

Not sure if its linked with the PND or whether after working somewhere for 10 years Ive just got bored (or that as a mum Im simply just not as interested in it anymore.)

Anyone else felt similar?
Kizziex

OP posts:
tanzie · 07/01/2004 21:05

Ooooh yes. I'm the only person in my office with small children, so no sympathy if I want to take a day's leave if one is sick. We were discussing work and what we would really like to do today at lunch, and I said I would like to either stay at home with my 2 children or work a couple of days a week max. They all looked at me as if I had just said "I drink my own wee" or something similar. Women bosses are much worse than men IMO. They are either resentful of you because they have no DP/DH and children or did it all the hard way and resent you because "things are so much easier these days". Want out. Now.

bossykate · 07/01/2004 21:05

pupuce, thanks for your reply, i'm pleased things are working out for you and that you're much happier.

i forget that we would be entitled to tax credits if i took a big drop in income, perhaps i should try to work the sums out again! where could i find out how much you get?

btw - our mortgage is approximately half what we would be allowed to borrow based on conservative lending limits. so it is not that we have overextended ourselves and are now paying the price... not that you said that, but it must be a sore point with me because i do tend to get defensive about it!

in fact, i've been wondering why on earth we've bothered to be "prudent". it doesn't mean i can give up work, but otoh, we have a lower standard of living, all for the psychological comfort of not feeling overstretched financially!

thanks again, and good for you

pupuce · 07/01/2004 21:09

the tax credit website has a calculator

bossykate · 07/01/2004 21:09

thanks

pupuce · 07/01/2004 21:10

Bossykate - get in touch if you want

Metrobaby · 07/01/2004 21:53

tanzie - I agree with your comment about women bosses.

I do actually enjoy my job - but I hate being f/t. Its exhausting. However, I'm looking forward to my mat leave in 11 wks now and hoping to return p/t when I return. Unfortunately as I am in IT I know that if I was to take a couple of years off, or leave IT entirely it would be extremely difficult for me to return, so I'd have to seriously think about doing something different.

I think if I was to concentrate on furthering my career, invariably my career as a Mum would suffer as a result - esp as my dh has a demanding job too - and I would hate that outcome

sibble · 07/01/2004 22:44

I found for me not only was I a jumped up twenty something but I progressed into a jumped up thirty something too!! until I had DS. I didn't have a problem going back to work when DS was a baby - I loved him but didn't feel he needed me - so I went back full time. The he started to develop and over the past nearly 4 years has turned into my 'little friend'. I started to resent being at work while somebody else was enjoying him and was not giving 110% to work which I have always expected of myself (and others!!). I kept my senior position and went p/t but that didn't help because I was either being phoned on my days off or decisions were made without my input and I couldn't let go... I also felt that now becasue I missed out on the social side when alot of decisions and ideas came about I was also missing out. All in all I found myself getting more and more disatisfied and miserable. I didn't feel I was a 'proper mum' but I also wasn't 'mrs career woman' either I had landed in limbo land. As I said early I am now a SAHM as am pregnant again, have not written myself of the career ladder but am treating it as a break....
Nobody can prepare you for your feelings after having a child.

Batters · 08/01/2004 09:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fennel · 08/01/2004 09:52

I think being able to work part time in a supportive workplace makes so much difference.

Sibble I really relate to what you say about missing out on a lot if you work part time, in my job (also HE research) I sometimes work part time and sometimes full time but my full time is only 35 hours and I have to accept reluctantly I can't compete with my 30-something child free peers who do 60-70 hour weeks.
I do have to keep reminding myself to not try and compare myself to these friends whose careers are steaming ahead, you really have to reassess your aims about what you can realistically achieve at work if part time. am still trying....

StressyHead · 08/01/2004 10:41

message withdrawn

kizzie · 08/01/2004 10:55

Stressyhead - your boss sounds like a total nightmare. I sometimes have to travel round (although sounds like nowhere near as much as you) but I really hate it now.
Kizziex

OP posts:
StressyHead · 08/01/2004 11:23

message withdrawn

bossykate · 08/01/2004 12:46

pupuce, thank you that is a kind offer

batters, yes i agree, if you live in london even a "modest" mortgage is quite large!

stressyhead, i'm sorry things haven't improved for you.

based on pupuce's advice, i'm going to look at our financial situation again. it is not as though dh doesn't work after all. if i take tax credit into account it might be possible to manage. my feelings about work are deeply confused - but at least when i'm feeling very trapped (i'm the main earner by a long way - and feeling trapped increasing frequently) at least there could be the option of a way out.

Metrobaby · 08/01/2004 13:07

Stressyhead how awful for you. I hate the way in some workplaces in seems that the only way to demonstrate your commitment to the job is to be seen putting in extra hours all the time. It is often not recognised that extra hours does not necessarily mean extra productivity either. No wonder with attitudes like that, that it is impossible to balance family life with work !

prufrock · 08/01/2004 19:30

bk - your dh could do his job outside of London couldn't he? Would a move elsewhere be out of the question?

Jimjams · 08/01/2004 21:40

Pupuce is right -it is worth remembering tax credit and stuff. We too a bit hit on dh's salary when we moved out of London, and I stopped working (I was only doing one day a week but that still translated into about 400 pounds a month so quite a bit to lose). However we now get tax credit, we don't have to pay to commute, dh isn't spending a fiver in pret a manger every day. We have the same size mortgage, and it feels as if we have the same amount of money which is a bit odd. We no more overdrawn than we were in London anywyay

bossykate · 09/01/2004 20:08

hi prufrock, in theory dh could move anywhere in the country (except cornwall - no universities there), but in practice jobs are come up very infrequently. he has been looking for ages anyway, because he wants a move from his current institution. he'd prefer to stay in london in the ideal world though. anyway, i know you've seen property prices outside london - gulp! things are getting just as bad!

i checked out the tax credit website. the amount we'd get, even with the truly pitifully small amounts academics like dh get paid, is pretty not large - i.e. would not be a make or break factor in terms of making a decision.

bossykate · 09/01/2004 20:09

doh! wanted to change "pretty small" to "not large" and stuffed it up!

Jimjams · 09/01/2004 20:58

Don't forget the cost of living though- depending on where you go it can be considerably less. For example when dh came for an interview down here he was very excited to find out that the kiddies roundabout rides in town were half the price of the same rides in Bromley. If you take out commuting you can end up saving a whack as well.

prufrock · 10/01/2004 14:03

Does your dh understand that that isn't entirely his choice to make though? Seems a bit selfish of him to want to stay in London if by doing so he is condeming you to continuing to work in a stressful job. And prices aren't that horrendous. We could easily swap a 2 bed flat here for a decent 4 bed house, and that's within commuting distance of the city. And as Jimjams said, you will make huge savings on cost of living - no more suits, no more little cashmere jumpers o go under them. No more takeaways or pcking up things at M&S because you are too tired too cook. No more overpriced pret sandwiches - I'm actually really looking forward to being so organised I can make huge savings on everyday stuff (I'm even planning my own litle vegetable patch)
For me the decision to leave work is slightly forced - I just couldn't stand to hand over £2k/month in nursery fees to enable me to do a job I'm not enjoying, but it really has made me so happy to be able to take what I hope will be such a positive step for all of us. It made me realise how unhappy I had been for so long, and you don't have to continue like that.

tigermoth · 11/01/2004 09:10

LOL at your husband getting excited about the cheaper fairground rides, jimjams!

I did lose some interest in my former job after my first child was born and lost the remainng interest in it after my second son arrrived. My demotivation was accelerated by the unfamilyfirendly policies of my workplace. Really, if I am honest, I was waiting for redundancy ( and the jobs market in my line of work was not bouyant at the times) and when it came it was a relief.

I then spent over a year as a SAHM to my then 3 and 8 year old and loved it. Especially as I had some 'me time' during the day when they were at school and nursery.

However, I now have got my second wind. I really like my new job, all things considering. I need the mental stimulation. I like meeting adults who are not my friends, and having to work with them.

I feel no guilt about working - both my sons are at school anyway, so wouldn't be with me. As my children have got older, I've stopped thinking 'ahh - I do wish we were all together now' I know they are happy and feel they need space away from me, fresh experiences, new friends and things to learn.

I know from the experience I had as an SAHM, that, minus job, I'd spend too long on mumsnet and drinking cups of tea while staring into space. Then wonder why I felt under used and isolated.

However, big however, the job I have now is local, flexible and very family friendly. Not only can I take my children to school in the morning, I can also take a late lunch hour and pick them up in the afternoon if I need to. Then drop them with dh at home and go back to work for a couple more hours. Using flexitime I get between 10 to 12 weeks holiday a year.And the job itself is interesting, challenging and my collegues and manager are fab! My ideal job - but sadly not a permanent one, though my temporary contract has been extended for the time being. So fingers crossed.

A few years ago, I could not imagine I would be truly happy in any job. Now I know differently. It's due to a combination of factors - older chlidren, different type of workplace. I feel inspired again. But of course if I won the lottery I'd be off like a shot.

Just a note on city commuting v country commuting. I live in London and spend nothing each day on commuting or food. I walk to and from work and take a packed lunch. If we move to Devon, our long term plan, I will almost certainly need to run a car to get me to and from work. Wish life was simple.

Jimjams · 11/01/2004 09:28

Tigermoth we live in Devon and dh doesn't use a car to commute (much as he'd like to, but no way- we can see his office from the house )

tigermoth · 11/01/2004 09:35

Glad there's hope, jimjams. I don't fancy a long, slow drive behind a tractor each morning.

bossykate · 21/01/2004 10:48

hi prufrock and jimjams

thank you for your comments. i have left this thread alone for a few days as it would have been a bit difficult for me to have continued the discussion without admitting i am pregnant - which is a major factor in why i am thinking about our options now.

some interesting points.

first of all, i don't think it is particularly unreasonable of dh to express a preference for where we live!

imagine if a mumsnetter posted on "am i being unreasonable no. 453"....

"my dh earns 80% of the household income and our outgoings are based on his salary. he's decided he's sick of it and has told me he's resigning and that it's my turn to pay the bills out of my badly paid public sector job. oh and he's telling me we have to move out of london even though i really don't want to go. i'm a bit pissed off with him - am i being unreasonable?" PMSL mumsnetters would be heaping abuse on this selfish monster!

in terms of moving out, the places i've looked at so far have been just as expensive as where we are now (e.g. tunbridge wells, st albans, guildford). i'm prepared to widen the search - bishop's stortford looks nice good state schools would be a sine qua non - and everyone knows what that does to house prices.

i'm not sure we could count on saving commuting costs either - dh would still need a car and possibly we would need to run another - or i could end up very isolated. obviously it would be something to consider in making the move.

we'd be prepared to move further afield, but only if there was a job for dh. as i said below, in academia, you can't rely on a job coming up because you fancy moving. it is one of the many miserable features of academic life that it is not unusual for academic staff to commute hundreds of miles.

i'd be happy to live on less than we have now, but remember, i am the main earner in our household. Pupuce is the only person I know who has been the main earner and has taken such a drastic course of action, and it was a forced move in her case.

Cutting out ready meals etc is not the issue for us if i give up work - the issue would be living on a third less than the average london salary (based on our current situation). living on less is one thing, but my worry would be having absolutely no contingency for, say, major repairs to the house. our income would not allow for any but the smallest monthly saving.

of course there are many, many people in london managing on much less - but many of them are not doing it from choice, and i don't think it is unreasonable to think (a lot more often than) twice about deliberately placing our family in that position.

And of course the final thing to consider is the very real consequences of giving up work. what if i hated it? there's the fear of loss of status etc. that the financial loss would be permanent. that the opportunities for the children would be much less. that we could actually do with a bit more space atm!

anyway, that's enough from me for now. i don't mean to be argumentative. this subject is really on my mind at the moment and it helps to write things down and mull them over at the same time.

pupuce · 21/01/2004 10:54

Hey - I am in Tunbridge wells... get in touch

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