Tricky one, I also need stories on unplanned pregnancies!

[Rhubarb]

Whether you decided to abort the pregnancy, get the baby adopted or you kept the baby. I know this is a sensitive topic, but I'm rebuilding my site on unplanned pregnancies and I want to give women as much info on each choice that is available to them, so sharing your experiences could really help other women struggling to come to terms with an unplanned pregnancy.

With the adoption one, I know it's very rare for anyone to get their baby adopted now, but perhaps you have adopted yourself? Or have some relevant experience of adoption?

Whilst I reserve the right to edit the stories, they will be treated with sensitivity and the words will remain unchanged. However, your name and other names can be changed to protect your identity.

You can either post your experiences on here, or email me at guinness _ maiden at hotmail dot com (no spaces). I would appreciate your help! Thanks!

unashamed bump

your welcome to tell my plight of destitution, poverty, dispair, depression - or you could tell them about my unplanned teenage pregnancy ha haaa haa haa ha aha ahhaaa ha

my ds wasn't planned when i was 16,(taking pill microgyen30)found out when i was 15weeks, i gave birth when i was 17, i don't like saying he was unplanned or mistake etc well i don't say any of these actually when people ask, i just say he was a little surprise

not all women struggle with it you know!!! My dd was unplanned - got pg 6 mths after ds - after years of trying and then IVF to have ds, I was told the chancs of me having another were virtualy zero. So a wee unplanned pg was a wonderful thing! Just imagine, getting pregnant without the help of all those drugs and mediacl staff!!

I've emailed you Rhubarb

I got pregnant at 17 on Microgynon30 as well (shock).

Right, let me see. Dd was unplanned. I had met her father at the end of October 1999 and was found I was pregnant at the end of January 2000. Although I had gone away with him for the New year and met his family we hadn't discussed any long term plans so the possibility of him not wanting to be a dad had to be considered. I gave it 5 days and then broke the news to him face to face. I had decided I would keep the baby regardless - I was 34, had my own flat and good wage with mum and dad nearby for support. Luckily he was overjoyed and we married that summer and dd is now 5.5 yo and I can't imagine life without her.

I am currently pg and it definately wasn't planned - It's been an emotional nightmare if I'm honest and now at 38 weeks we're having a mad rush to replace all the baby stuff I sold after DS was born in 2004 and it's really only just sinking in that in 12 days I'm going to have another baby......

That's a rough outline - not sure if it's anything near what you're looking for! If it is give me a shout and I'll email you :)

My PG with DS was unplanned. I suspect I subconsciously wanted to have a baby as a face saving out from a well paid and prestigious career that was making me very unhappy . Once I had got over the shock, I was actually very pleased to be PG, and never considered an abortion. Unfortunately much of the PG was subsequently marred by a reoccurence of OCD, and then depression, but that's a separate isue!

btw am the MNetter formerly known as MTS.

My best friend had a baby at aged 16 in 1988. Her mum and dad had recently separated and it was decided by her mum and her boyfriends parents that the baby would be adopted. My friend wasn't pushed into this decision but her circumstances (her recently divorced mum was unemployed after the divorce so had no money to support a teenager and new baby) really did dictate the outcome.

She was given the option to move into an unmarried mothers home (most for financial reasons) which she did. She had the baby on her own without pain relief and he was handed to his adopted parents three days later.

She has never regretted the decision. It sounds cheesy but she really does believe he has a better life with parents who she chose. I think milestone dates are particularly hard and the birth of her first child after she was married must have been exceedingly difficult.

The child's father had no say in the matter - he on the other hand was absolutely and utterly devastated. My heart breaks when I recall a scene at the hospital where the social worker had allowed him a little time with his baby boy, he cried his eyes out and begged them not to take that baby away . He was never the same after that.

I met dh in oct 1996 moved in together feb 1997 bought a house august 1997 and found out I was 8 weeks pg 6 weeks later. She is now 7.11 and I couldn't live without her.

i to got pg at 17 taking Microgynon30 , and then again, i year after, again taking Microgynon30 , and then 19 years later again and still taking Microgynon30 .
and now been ttc for 1.5years and just bloody carnt catch on

trace i got pregnant when on microgynon!! it must be dodgy perhaps we could sue the makers!! :o

I got pregnant while taking Microgynon30 too. Starting to see a trend here!!

maybe we should have our own thread!!

I didn't expect so many replies! I just want to thank those who have emailed, I have got your mails and I have replied.

Custy - send us your story then!

I do understand that not every unplanned pregnancy is a terrible thing. I suppose my site is mainly set up for those women for whom the pregnancy has come as a shock and are considering all their options. I also have sections on depression, both pre and post natal. The site is \link{http://www.unplannedpregnancies.co.uk\unplannedpregnancies}, please have a look. I would also like to have a few good outcome stories on there too, so if you decided to keep your baby and everything turned out great, then I'd love to include your stories too! I kept my own unplanned pregnancy and now I wouldn't be without her! She is my life.

Thanks for all the replies!

Hey there

Dunno if you would be interested in my story as it was in New Zealand? But i had an unplanned pg at age 15. Adopted out , this being my own choice and have never ever regretted it.At first my family was not surprisingly in shock but they stood by me and my father was with me through the birth(absent mother. My first born is now a strapping 18 year old. I signed for an open adoption and have kept in touch with him throughout. His birthday i remember with fondness rather than sadness and know that for me it was the right decision. Though at the time i was pro life(more to do with a catholic upbringing than anything)as i got older i grew up and realised that everyones situation is different and have a very pro choice stance now.

Anyway hope that has helped a little and feel free to get in touch if you want to know anything else. Asw you can tell i am very open and happy to talk and discuss this :)

Thank you, I'd love to get your story! There are not many people who opt for adoption, so I'd like to add lots of info about it and experiences. I've added a link to my site, so you can read what I've written so far about adoption. I'd really like to know what you made you decide to go for adoption rather than the other choices (I know you said you had a catholic upbringing), how you felt during the pregnancy and after the birth, and why you feel it was the right thing to do now.

I do appreciate your honesty and openness! Hopefully your story will help other women in the same situation.

Off to bed now, will reply to any emails or replies on this thread as soon as I can. Thanks everyone!

OMG i can't beleive so many of us got pregnant on the same pill! I can honestly say i took my pill every morning at same time and never missed a single pill! I am so shocked!

me too never missed any always at 830 every morning

have left my story on your website. hope it will be of help.

Thanks everyone. It is disturbing to hear about pregnancies on the pill, I really think you start a new thread with that one and then perhaps send a link to the thread to the makers of that pill. I took that one too, but I didn't get pregnant until I switched to condoms!

My second pregnancy was'nt planned, I was working full time for fairly good money, and we were in very much debt, I new immediately I would keep the baby, and hopefully continue to work, however it turned out I was having twins, so going back to work was now out of the question due to childcare. DTS are 2 now, and I only work 8 hrs a week, we are still in debt, but they are under control, and under no pressure, everything just seems to have fallen into place, we are even going abroad this year and dts are adorable