Why do i find smear tests so hard to dal with.......?

[Dreams]

Hi, I have given birth once but i still find smear tests hard to deal with! I don't mind the taking your clothes off bit but i hate the bit of putting the spect.... thing inside. I have one to go to tomorrow as i had an abnormal one a year ago now! Iwas meant to go to the hospital to have a coloscopy but i could not face it i was petrified to say the least!
I feel embarrassed and feel i should be able to deal with things like this but i cant. I have had this smear booked for 1 week now and ever since i have booked it i have been scared ...worried etc!
The doctor has given me some diazepan to take before i go she said it will help relax me it is 5mg dose and i have been advised to take 2 one hour before my appointment has anyone had these tablets and do they work??
Any advice on how to relax and just get it over and done with?
I have only ever had one smear and that was at my 6 week check after i had my son and i found that one quite easy to deal with (it did not seem to hurt) but then i went for another one about 4 months later and she just could not do what she wanted to as i kept closing my legs saying it hurt and moving! this is my first one since then (tomorrow) and i know this is essential to have to see if i still have pre-melignant cells like i did before but i don't know how i am gonna get through it! HELP

Hi everyone hope you all had a lovely christmas and a happy new year first chance i have had to come on here and read all your messages as have been up North for a week or so with the in laws!
I am going to be phoning the doctors next week some time to make another appointment got to pluck up the courage first. I have some more of the tablets so thats cool!. So nice to see other people suffer with the same as me I wish i did not suffer as i do like some people can just go and not worry about it i wish i was like this :0) Maybe in about another 10-20 years maybe i will get used to it ;0).
Let me know how you get on lou33 in feb you havea while to go yet but goodluck and well done for making that move as you said you need to really as for what happened to your mum better to be safe than sorry!