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Original poster

my poor mum flying to australia alone..

23 replies

mousie · 13/03/2006 20:29

my poor mum (65 and not super fit and healthy) is off to australia in the next few days for the first time in her life. Her brother lives out there and she has just discovered he has terminal cancer - weeks, if that, to live. All very shocking and upsetting for her and rest of family. She is determined to go and see him before he dies (feels she will regret it if she doesn't go and I am sure she is right). But I am worried for her on that flight (she can't afford business class or anything and neither can i or I would upgrade her willingly). Any tips for making her travel comfortable and the whole experience bearable. I almost feel I should offer to go with her - but I have two small kids, no obvious childcare and obviously can't bear the thought of being away from my kids for a week plus. My father is going to stay home to look after my younger sister who is still at school. This feels very much like a trip she has to do alone..

OP posts:

starlover · 13/03/2006 20:31

can't you have your younger sister to stay? then your dad could go with her?

otherwise i would make her a travel bag full of things she might need... any medication, some magazines etc etc
make sure she wears some flight socks

Thirtysix · 13/03/2006 20:34

Oh your poor Mum but what agreat thoing to be able to do.
Definitely reccomend the shoulder/neck pillow thingies-they are great....sleeping pills...just to help her get off to sleep-herbal if preferred,ask for an extra blanket and pillow when she gets on-even if she doesn't need them she can rest her feet on them to raise them a bit.

If it was my Mum (and I lost her nearly a year ago) I would contact the airline and really play the emotional card with them-explain the situation and if necessary,let the tears you must have there flow and you never know-they may take pity and upgrade her.

I hope she has a fabulous time.....

tribpot · 13/03/2006 20:38

Try not to worry, my parents regularly jet off to Australia, even though I am quite sure the flight would finish me off entirely. The oldsters are pretty resilient.

The main thing she needs to do is get up and walk around regularly, make sure she's got bottled water with her (not that you can't get it from the crew but in case she doesn't want to bother them), moisturiser, books to read, CDs and so on. I wonder if she could get together some photos and have a look at doing a scrapbook en route (this might be a bit ambitious for a little seatback table, admittedly), some knitting or cross stitch?

cece · 13/03/2006 20:41

thirty six just what I was going to say. Definitely phone airline and explain situation - you never know they may upgrade if they aren't full...

Also neck pillow great. Could also try to prebook a aisle seat by phoning the airline. Makes it easier to get up and stretch the legs. Take a good book (or two). She is unlikely to get a bulk head seat if she is a bit frail I am afraid.

On the flight you can ask for writing paper and envelopes and they will then post your letter for free.... (well the airlines I've been on will..)

Herbal sleeping pills also very good. Pack spare undies in handluggage. Plus toiletires, toothbrush etc.

If stopping at Singapore... Lots to do inclduing free city tour if your stopover is over a certain number of hours. Plus showers etc to use at the airport.

Original poster

mousie · 13/03/2006 20:47

thank you - yes phoning airline a really good idea. I have offered to have my sister to stay - or to go there and look after her there - but I think my mum thinks my dad will find it so difficult as a sitution - my uncle is going to marry his girlfriend before he dies - my mum is going out for that too - and it's the sort of thing my dad would find really hard to deal with - he would find it too emotional and unnecessary and probably would make my mum uncomfortable as a result. It is all very difficult in this respect.. encouraging to hear that oldies can cope well with the flight - i think she is planning to go over for a week so the jetlag will be massive both ways...

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Original poster

mousie · 13/03/2006 20:48

also any tips for really good neck pillows - my budget would definitely stretch to that!

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Thirtysix · 13/03/2006 20:49

SIngapore airport is great for a stopover just for a few hours-not only do they have a lovely garden to get outside but there is a hotelIN the airport which has a lovely pool.For a minmal charge she could have a swim and shower before gettign back on the plane...if I think of any other tips will get back....

Original poster

mousie · 13/03/2006 20:51

thank you thirty six - that is a very good tip - will encourage her to look at booking with them.

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WharfRat · 13/03/2006 20:58

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WharfRat · 13/03/2006 21:00

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Chandra · 13/03/2006 21:21

I think one of the most i\mportant things to make things easier for her is to explain to her with all detail what is going to hapen during the flight: how long each flight will take, how and where to ask for help at connections and services she may find in the airport. A little project/book to keep her mind distracted may help lots.

If it's of any help, my mum has done several trasatlantic flights on her own, obviously she was anxious first time but, hey, she doesn't speak English so.. it's not going to be that difficult. About the jet lag, it helps to eat slightly less than normal during the days before the flight, by following the meals served at the plane she will get her body ready for the time change. Best of luck

Aero · 13/03/2006 21:41

\link{http://www.prezziesplus.co.uk/NECK_CUSHTIE.html\These are great and I can recommend this company as very reliable.}

eidsvold · 14/03/2006 01:30

call the airline and explain - have her noted as needing assistance and they will escort to gates etc. I would also try and buy her a little bag of goodies for on the plane - some mags, sweets, books, things like that - nice moisturiser for her face etc. tribpot has made some fab suggestions.

arfissimo · 14/03/2006 01:47

Evian spritzers are really good on flights - you can get small purse sized ones.

I have an excellent buckwheat filled neck pillow which I use. It's a bit bulky though. You can also get aromatherapy inflatable neck pillows.

Agree to pack a goody bag - sweets, aspirin, water, nibbles, puzzle books. I always (pre-children!) used to listen to audio books on my personal stereo. Absolutely brilliant.

You can print off maps of most airports - if you have a good itinerary you can mark where she has to go on the map (or if you won't know the gates for the airlines, at least where the cafes and loos are).

Perhaps pack some money in the correct currency for the stopover? Guide book (for the practical information like what police look like, emergency numbers etc).

Warn her that hotels are pubs!

tilbatilba · 14/03/2006 01:50

Personally I would write. I think you have far more chance of your mother being really well looked after . Goodluck

Original poster

mousie · 14/03/2006 07:56

all great ideas - thanks for the cushtie website - they look just the thing. also the currency tip - something i woudl never have thought of. thank you all. i should know in the next day or two what airline she is flying and then decide how to contact them best and most effectively. I kind of assume they get hundreds of letters like this every day, but maybe not..

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suzywong · 14/03/2006 07:58

yes I agree, get her to go Singapore and ask for a wheelchair and a pusher at each end.

suzywong · 14/03/2006 07:59

don't know if it's been mentioned but flight socks with the elastic support are a must for the over 60s and get her one of those blow up neck pillows and of course see her right through to the departure lounge. SIngapore Airlines like to be notified of nervous travellers too, they are very very good indeed. Why, I trust my own crumbly parents to them.

katierocket · 14/03/2006 08:27

my mum (70) does this trip pretty much once a year (my sister lives in Aus). It is a hell of a journey but she will be OK, the cabin crew will look out for her. Some great tips here, especially calling ahead to notify the airline. Also (sorry if someone has mentioned it already) but don't get the blow up kind of neck pillow, they're awful, \link{http://www.edirectory.co.uk/pf/pages/moreinfoa.asp?pe=DCGFFJEQ_+squishee+comfort+neck+pillow&cid=880\get this one} it has tiny squishy beads in it which mould around your head much better.

katierocket · 14/03/2006 08:28

ah, just seen that Areo was recommending the same one, they are definitely the best.

jenkel · 14/03/2006 08:46

My Mum has flown to Australia on her own quite a few times, she has a sister out there, the last time she flew was last year and she was 59, so not quite as old as your mum. I dont think she enjoys the flight but finds it necessary to see her sister. The important thing is to tell her to keep active on the flight and drink lots of water. Mum has problems with her legs so she wears support stocking things that the GP gave her.

banthambabe · 14/03/2006 09:09

Hi I know you have had loads of advice but a couple more things if she does take knitting cross stitch etc find out what they allow in the cabin as most wont take metal needles but do accept plastic knitting needles. Also the airline might not commit to upgrading her before the flight but ask again when she checks in and it can help to look smartish. I travelled to Oz after a bad accident and just put a smartish jacket over my comfy clothes I was going to travel in when I checked in and though they didnt upgrade me for the whole flight they did for one of the legs. which made a difference. My Mum flew over last year for 5 days for a funeral of a close friend and said that she didnt really feel the jet lag over there because she had such a short time and she just kept going it just caught up with her when she got back HTH

Original poster

mousie · 14/03/2006 10:21

what is the best way of contacting hte airline - how do i get the name of the right pereson to talk to/ email - any suggestions? I worry that if I just phone up cold they will all be very nice and say they will try their best but no one will actually do anything. I like to speak to the right person and am not sure who this would be.. any ideas.

and thanks again for all the tips - am ordering my neck cushion for her now..

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