sorry, another I want a baby but he doesn't thread

[ferny]

I feel like I want to leave my dp over this. I'm so upset.
I have broached the subject of having another child a few times with him (we have one ds) and he has always said "not yet". This implied, to me, that one day he would want one.

I asked him last night if we could have another baby and he just said no. Not ever. He doesn't want another one.

He said that how can we love another one as much as we love ds? That ds is so perfect that how can another baby match up to it.
He also said that ds was so much hard work (not that he ever does anything much with him) and that he has the choice of having a good night's sleep or having a baby that will wake him up.

I think he sees a child as a huge inconvenience to him. how selfish is that? And more worryingly I think he feels that ds and I are both inconveniences too.

I am gutted. I didn't want to have an age gap of more than 2 years between ds and the next baby and now that's never going to happen. ds will never have a sibling and I'll never have any more children.

thanks sophable. it's nice to know I am not alone in this!

actually, something that Flossam said on your thread hit home. that was that she has realised there are great (but different) things about any size age gap.
So I suppose even though I wanted a small age gap, I will find just as positive things about a bigger gap.

My sister and I are 4 years apart - my mum was younger like you, but she had miscarriages in between us.

We both liked it! No competition, my sister was already potty trained, able to dress herself and in nursery school when I came along.

Now we're 35 and 39 and very, very close.