Ok all you SAHMs, convince me to jack in the job!

[sassy]

I currently do 2 days p/week, teaching in a secondary school. The 2 dds are at nursery, where they are happy and settled, but I no longer get the buzz from working that I always have done, and we don't really need the pitiful money I bring home. I am toying (increasingly seriously)with giving up and being a SAHM for 4 years or so until dd2 is at school.

My main worries are:

Will I be bored?
intellectually unstimulated?
lack adult company?
etc.

Pearls of wisdom from those of you at home please!

Well, I used to work part time after the birth of Ds2 (now6). But i was out every weekend, so didn't see Dh or kids. I should say that when Ds1 was little i used to work when my Dh had his four days off.
I gave it up to stay at home, however i started childminding. I get to take the boys to school every day, i pick them up from school, i'm there to make their meals, if they are ill etc, and i don't need to worry about childcare. I've seen them growing up and been there for most of the major milestones in their young lifes.
My own mother was a SAHM ( admittedly not through choice, as my dad was very ill for most of my childhood so she looked after him), but i knew that she was always at home for me, and i felt very secure in that knowledge.
I'm not criticsing(sp?) working mums - we all make the choice that suits us, but i love being at home, and still being able to contribute the family finances.
I go out to toddler groups with the mindees i have so have adult conversation, I go to see friends for coffee, and i have days when i don't have mindees so i go shopping or to the gym. and i will admit to having days when i think "why am i doing this?", but then my Ds will come running out of school all excited to see me, and i know why.
Sorry, i went off track a bit there with the info about CM, but you get the drift.
If you are so keen to jack in the job, then do it, otherwise you may find yourself getting resentful and not wanting to go to work.

Could you easily get part time work again once you've given up?

I gave up my job (largely because of dd's health at the time). I'm aiming to be back at work this year but I can't find a job to go back to part time. There are plenty of full time jobs but I really don't want to do that.

The longer you spend with your kids at home, the harder it is to go back to work. I would jump at a part-time job now but the chances are, I'll never be offered one.

Staying at home is what you make of it - but I would seriously consider what you might have to go through to get your job back in 4 yrs time before you jack this job in (I have no idea how easy or difficult this would be in teaching!).

Sassy, it's an interesting one! I do two days at work but this is because the pitiful money I bring in is what we desperately need to survive. I would give up like a shot if I could. This is because I enjoy being with my son more than being at work and find more enjoyment, buzz and stimulation from being a mum to him and promoting and nurturing his development.

HOWEVER - two days is not much out of the week and I feel pretty much like a full time mum because of this. The two days, though I don't want them, are actually a break for me and my son from eachother which doesn't feel unhealthy to me. I personally wouldn't stay at work if I didn't have to but there are benefits from it that I do see. We miss eachother and appreciate eachother because of sometimes being apart - he spends time at pre-school and with his two adoring grannies, sometimes seeing his cousins too.

Sorry these not exactly the pearls of wisdom you asked for but am just letting you know my thoughts! One thing that I am strongly feeling though is that I REALLY want to be there for my son when he starts school. It's such a big thing in his life, I want to take him and pick him up EVERY DAY not just some! I also want to be involved with the school, help out, go on visits - difficult to do with work and all. What has surprised me is how I feel my son needs me just as much when at school, at least in reception year.

Teaching is easy to get back into isn't it? If I were you I think I'd be home while I could - teachers are always in demand and you can pick it up again when ready?

Also, as a SAHM maybe you'd get that time that I wistfully think about - you have dropped the kids off at school, you hop off for a swim or to the gym, you meet a friend for coffee.......BLISS! A bit of relaxation after the hard slog of young childrearing.

As you are only talking about 2 days a week you already know what being a SAHM is like, it's just a question of whether more of the same appeals to you. Is it working that you are fed up with, or just that job in particular?

I would advise caution. It might be different in secondary school, but I taught primary and happily gave up my job when I had ds1 as i hated the school and it was quite a distance away. Had I been in my previous job, I would have done everything in my power to maintain a part-time position there.

6 years after stopping work, I finally plucked up the courage to go for a part-time job in a new area. I stuck it 4 months. Now 10 years after first giving up work, I don't feel I have the confidence or the up-to-date knowledge to go back. Things have changed a lot since I last taught full-time and my part-time experience in a strange school has really put me off.

I would have thought your 2 days a week was an ideal compromise. But you clearly think differently. Is there another solution without actually giving up work completely? Could you cut it down to one day a week? Change schools? Go into private tutoring? Just thoughts for you.

don't do it...

Why not try a different job?

I have recently jacked in a full time teaching job as i had lost the passion for it. I can honestly say that I am not bored and make sure that I keep in contact with people for the odd nightetc. Why dont you try it and if you get boared you could do supply teaching, which is probably better money or tutoring. I am now doing a bit of tuition and im really enjoying it. Good luck with whatever you decide

Hi Sassy,
I'm a full time sahm and most of the time I do love it, after 3 years. I'm also a teacher, but I teach Reception age, so going back to work to teach 20 odd other children didn't seem like much of a break to me!!
Personally, I wouldn't mind a little part time job, only a couple of days a week but definitely one that you don't bring home with you like teaching!
If you're worried about the intellectual stim. you could always do a course, I leaned French for a while.
The trick to not getting bored and missing adult conversation is not to actually stay at home! Get out there and meet people. I go out every day, sometimes our weeks are too busy, but I have a lot of 'grown up' friends and we don't just chat about the Boden catalogue and which ballet class is best - honest!

I, like Lonelymum, think you should consider more options before giving up your job. I just had 68 applicants for a lowly job taking up some of the slack of me going down to 3 days a week-I think times have got tougher recently-in previous years we were lucky to get 2 applicants for this sort of work-ok it's not teaching, but getting a job you like, that you can get to without moving house, is not always easy I'm sure, even teaching.

Why don't you think laterally and try or at least find out about some other things before handing in your notice, like tutoring, babysitting, craft, working for a charity, whatever you fancy, to see if you would like it and could make a go, it might even pay more and be more flexible!

Thanks for all your replies. Sorry for tardiness in replying but this is the 1st chance Ive had to post since Weds!

I've pretty much decided to give up. I don't enjoy working (and I think its working itself, not that job IYSWIM), and I am lucky enough to be in a position to be able to be with my kids for a while before they go to school. I used to love my job, but the job has changed and so has my attitude to it. Now I feel less and less like dragging my 2dds out at the crack of dawn twice a week to go to work and get grief from spotty teens.

LM -I get what you say about losing my touch/confidence while I'm out. I've had advice via a mutual friend from another friend who is a Headteacher, and he says Heads are much more open to employing returners than they used to be. It's a gamble, I know, but I guess worst case scenario is having to take a job somewhere grotty, working my socks off for a year to upgrade knowledge/skills (and get up-to-date reference!)then move on to somewhere nicer. I've been aHead of Year as well as a classroom teacher so I hope that broader experience would count for something.

So..unless I have another change of heart, it looks like I'll be working until the end of the year, then a SAHM.

Cheers again for your responses.