What is the youngest to leave a child on their own ?

[crystaltips]

My DS is 10 and as yet I have not left him alone in the house for 5 minutes, let alone a couple of hours .... However some of my mates leave their kids ( aged 10 ) for about an hour whilst they collect other kids from clubs etc.
I was just wondering what you thought about leaving kids "Home ALone".
Instructions like, don't answer the phone / door ... and here's my mobile number in case of an emergency ....
It's not just that that worries me ... but what if I get into a car accident and cant get back to the house ... the mind boggles.
It's all a part of growing up and cutting the apron strings ... but when so I start to let go ... ?

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There are no legal guidelines for the age that a child can be left at home but commonsense should be applied. It is based on the childs maturity to be trusted and safely look after themself in your absence.

There are no legal guidelines for the age that a child can be left at home but commonsense should be applied. It is based on the childs maturity to be trusted and safely look after themself in your absence.

I have done it around the 11-12 year old but for only like an odd half an hour.
I always pump my mobile no into the phone before I leave so all they have had to do is press redial.
If I am not back at a certain time to phone their grandparents and tell them something has happened (fortunately never has)

It also depends on the maturity of the child.

Found this on the net:

Q&A: Home alone
With two high profile cases of parents leaving their children to fend for themselves, BBC News Online asked legal expert Katy MacFarlane of the Scottish Child Law Centre to explain the law governing parental responsibility.
Q. Is there a legal age at which children can be left at home alone?

A. No, there is no minimum in either Scotland or England and Wales. The law takes the view that one 13-year-old could be very mature while a 15-year-old equally immature.

Q. Does that mean a parent cannot be prosecuted for leaving their child alone?

A. Not for leaving them alone, per se, but they can be prosecuted if they did not provide enough food, warmth, entertainment or access to emergency help. Or if they were likely to come to harm.

It is also dependant on the length of time the parent is absent. So while half an hour after school might be acceptable, overnight might not.

The 1933 Children and Young Persons Act says it is wilful neglect for a parent to leave a child unsupervised "in a manner likely to cause unnecessary suffering or injury to health".

Q. At what age is it advisable to leave a child alone?

A. It depends on the child. But we would recommend to parents that by 16, a child is being left on his or her own as part of the preparation they need for adulthood. It should be done gradually. The most important thing is that the child is happy

I have always thought that the age was 12, I don't know why? My oldest is 9years old, and I've been thinking, another 3years and I can start relaxing, the others are 7years and 15months old.

crystaltips, I leave my 10-yr-old in alone for shortish periods - say up to an hour - he is quite happy with it (would rather watch TV than trudge round the supermarket) and he's sensible. He does know that nobody comes in and he doesn't go out, so if a friend of his calls while I'm out they communicate through the window!

However he is my youngest, I have definitely got more casual as the family has grown - though I might have left the eldest in alone at 10, not sure now, but when she was 10 the others were 7 and 4 and it tended to be like the 3 Musketeers.

It depends on you and your child, basically - if you would worry about him then don't do it yet.

I remember being left home alone for short periods from 8yo... but I was a mature 8yo. I was walking to/from schoool alone at 7yo, too, which didn't seem that unusual, then.

Both my parents always worked fulltime and I had a key to let myself in after school from the age of 7. Most of my friends were also home alone from an early age. I think young children are more than capable of looking after themselves. Would I leave my 7 year-old DD home alone? No way! Not sure why. Just a feeling, I guess, that we live in different times (and different country) from when I grew up. Not sure when I will leave her alone for the first time. 18? 21? Not sure...

I also thought the law said you couldn't leave children under 12 home alone......

Zebra and Fairymum, snap. Don't know how I'd feel about ds in the same position. Pretty sure I'd now think it was too young.

Ds is 10 and I have only recently started leaving him at home for very brief times - before doing so I have asked him what would he do if.....
there was a fire
someone knocked at the door
someone phoned and asked for me

When I felt his answers were appropriate then I was happy to leave him - this is usually while I nip my dd to ballet or recently to school whilst he was not well.

My ds is 11 and in yr 6. I have started to leave him for the odd hr or two in the school holidays whilst taking dd out.
He is happier at home than traipsing around with us and he is under strict instuctions not to answer the door to anyone, and to tell anyone who phones Iam in the shower.
He is a very sensible and mature boy and I phone home every half hr to check on him.
I can't possibly think of anything that could go wrong that he couldn't cope with.
He stays down stairs and only goes into the kitchen for a drink.
On the other hand iam v over protective compared to his peers mothers when it comes to freedom outside the home.
I don't let him walk to or from school. And I rarely let him go anywhere alone.
I even watch him cross our small road to his friends house.
The thought of all those roads teerifys me.

I'm curious about what you found Ninja, the law in Scotland must have changed, because years ago one of my Dad's friend's was furious at being prosecuted for leaving his strappy great teenager alone for an hour. The police apologised (!) and said that in Scotland there was an age limit written into the law (but I have now forgotton what it was) whereas in England it was at the discretion of the police if they thought the child was too young to be left alone.

Mine have all been at least 14 before I left them on their own and I think ds1 was 15. Dd1 fell and badly hurt her ankle (luckily not fractured) on one of the first occasions we left her, which didn't exactly help.

Because my grandad lived with us and I had much older siblings, I was virtually never on my own until I left home!! I don't think that is good, though, as it meant I was scared of being on my own for a long time.

This bothered us too. The first time we left them alone was the day Diana died so they were 11, 10, 8 & 6. We popped up to Homebase for something specific ( ie we weren't browsing- we knew we were going straight there, buying whatever it was & coming straight back- 30 mins tops) on the Sunday morning.

After that went OK we just tried odd trips of short duration. We had a mobile, they had a mobile & we always made sure that grandad (10 mins drive) was at home when we left them, and that they knew it was ok to call next door if they needed anything.

The first time we went to the pictures (much much later) I was on edge the whole time. Now they are 17, 16, 14 & 12 & I don't give it a thought (but have only once left them overnight, recently)

I've just remembered something that happened to my best friend's friend. They left their 17yo dd overnight for the first time ever. She went out that evening, having titivated herself up in her mum's bedroom. She came home and went to bed but was awakened at about 3am by a fireman crashing in through her bedroom door!!

She'd left her mum's hair tongs switched on and resting on the carpet. It slow-burned through the carpet and eventually the curtains went on fire, at which point a neighbour was woken up by the flames and called the fire brigade, hence the bursting-into-the-bedroom scene!!!! Her mum wasn't best pleased, that's for sure.

A friend of mine left her eldest on his own in the house for short periods when he was 10...but admittedly he had an old head on his shoulders and was very responsible. However, her second son is now 10 and is not allowed to stay on his own because he is irresponsible. I would say that at the end of the day you know your own child and you have to make a decision on that basis rather than age. I will probably be a paranoid mum who will not let my girls stay at home by themselves until they are at least....ohhh.....25..lol!

Just deleted a whole LONG text about what if you don't leave them, but send your child (13) to your ex-dh and know that he and his (wife) are going to be out and leaving your child with his step-sister (17) over the weekend? "Nuff said, I don't really know who's listening here, so can't incrimmenate myself too badly!!

I remember my 11 year old brother babysitting for the rest of us (10, 8 and 6) when my mum and dad went out for the night ...
There is no way I can see myself letting DS do that when he is 11!!

Linked to this thread what do people without family nearby do when the kids are in that inbetween stage for babysitters. We have always had teenage girls of friends or neighbours in the last few years. My sons are 10 and 12 and it is going to get more of a prblem to leave them with say a 16 year old.

Yes, I'd like to know, too. We have no family nearby and I sometimes feel my oldest ds would be safer on his own in a few years time (he's 9 now). I wonder if young teenagers and older children will egg each other on towards anarchy?I don't care about the two very big, tall teenagers who like to jump up and down on our sofa with my sons, while the stereo is blasting out loud music, OK as long as no bones or sofa gets broken but I do feel sad about another teenage neighbour who babysat for us recently - her parents are nice, trustworthy people. Sadly, strong circumstantial evidence leads us to assume she stole a very old and quite valuable piece of jewelery - a family heirloom.

FWIW I believe my 10-yr-old is a lot more sensible than my 15-yr-old. Discovered yesterday that he (15) had thought it was a good idea to put a poker in the fire until it was glowing and then stick it into a glass (a GLASS!!!!) of cold water to see it sizzle.

dot, dot, dot.

I sometimes think that about my oldest 2 Janh. They are 11 1/2 and almost 7.

i was told by a social worker last week that if a parent chooses to leave a child under the age of 16 alone- and for whatever reason social services become involved then YOU as a parent can be prosecuted! (this was MY understanding of her reply to the exact question on this thread)....now i am not pointing any fingers because i have recently left my ds1 (age 10) alone for 10mins max as he has created such a fuss at having his playstatin 'fun' interupted when i have to pick up dh from work...... that despite ds1 having asperger's i have decided that to drag him out of the house was worse than the 'risk' of leaving him home- the social worker said the bit about'depending on the child etc'- but ultimately if a neighbour was concerned and reported me i could be interviewed and possibly prosecuted,....any social workers out there to clarify my understanding??? Also what about a 'legal' age to let children outside alone...there's 3 yr olds just left totheir own devices around here and i can't help but feel they just don't have the 'road sense' at 3??? Still i've gone off thread again!!!