I am PATHETIC

[handlemecarefully]

My boss has just sprung on me that she wants me to go to the Royal South Hants Hospital in Southampton for a meeting at lunch time. I just don't want to go because I can't stand the hassle. Last time I went for a meeting there it took me 35 minutes to get a parking spot (you have to queue and wait your turn) - its always this bad. My blood pressure will rocket and I have a big car which is difficult to park and I have to forego certain spaces because my car won't fit!

I've been told to park in the streets outside somewhere - but I don't know the area and if I start driving around I'll just get lost. Its also a really dodgy red light area around there.

I'm also dressed very scruffily today as my diary was clear with no meetings prior to this being sprung on me.

I am going to make an excuse why I can't go - but I feel a pathetic for being so feeble. Would / have any of you been equally pathetic? Should I pull myself together and go and not be so ridiculous ???

(Pregnancy hormones - I probably sound deranged. Am getting things out of proportion)

Nah, you need a break at lunchtime not to drive round and round going bonkers. IMO.

Agree. You need the break at lunch. I hate having things sprung on me like that, especially if I know it is going to be a hassle. Can you think of a good excuse not to go?

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Oooh nooo - if you are pathetic then so am I. I hate things being sprung on me and feeling unprepared. Sounds like a nightmare for you - making an excuse sounds like a fab idea.

Excellent idea Twiglett

is she trying to get out of going to this meeting herself?

What about calling the person you're supposed to be meeting and asking to rearrange for tomorrow, later in the week or next week? Then you can tell your boss you can't do it today but can do it tomorrow/Friday/whenever. Also is there any allocated staff parking and can the person you are meeting get you a temporary permit for the meeting? If not, I'd go the asking for a taxi expenses route. Ikwym and I don't think it's reasonable to spring a meeting on anyone at such short notice.

Ummm, I wouldn't be that impressed if one of my staff made such a fuss about parking, to be honest, and I don't think I am ogre boss from deepest hell! Think you could earn brownie points by suggesting that maybe you could take taxi so that working time isn't wasted with parking, and asking her (all innocent like) if she thinks you are suitably dressed for the meeting in question. Is it due to some unforseen circumstances that she needs you to fill in? in which case, you'll earn yourself loads of leeway for when you might REALLY need it in the future by taking the challenge.

hmc, I am phobic about parking (and I'm not even pregnant!) so I sympathise very much!

If it has to be you and it has to be today agree they should get you a taxi, or could someone else from work take you and pick you up? How far is it?

you can't refuse to go to a meeting because you don't like the hassle of parking! sorry, I'm in the "pull yourself together and if necessary get a cab" camp. and if you are looking scruffy, then make sure that when you get into the meeting you mention that you were hoping to have a full day to yourself in the office getting things done today (but don't mention your appearance or apologise for anything) and let them work it out.

never apologise, never explain in these sorts of circumstances!

I'm with PPH on this one. If my boss calls a last minute meeting thhen he calls a last minute meeting and it's tough. Often things crop up in my line of work that need to be discussed immediatley and we just can not give people a few days notice to prepare. The parking issue is a problem so I'd get a cab and at least you'll be stress free when you arrive. Good Luck.

Thanks all

Well I made what I hope was a plausible excuse and didn't go. Northerner, PPH and Blu - yes you're right I am being a bit wet (my Dh who is exasperated with me would wholeheartedly agree), and I do agree with you that perhaps I ought to have gone. However its not last minute meetings per se that I mind, its last minute meetings at the RSH in Southampton!! The parking situation really is too much to bear -people have come to blows over spaces before. Its indescribably (sp?) bad. The taxi option isn't really viable because my workplace would be too tight to pay for a taxi there and back since its a round trip of 34 miles.

Apparently I will have to go to RSH quite often in the future due to the project I am working on - so doddery woman driver that I am (sorry joke - women drivers are the best)I plan to have a reconnaisance down there at the weekend and have a drive around the streets local to the hospital so that I can advance plan where I might park in future - to avoid this whole 'getting into a tizz thing'. Still feel a bit silly that I am so feeble - but then, none of us are perfect I guess...

hmc, could you drive to within a couple of miles of the hospital, where it might be easier to park, and then get a taxi from there for the last bit?

HMc Is it near Derby Rd?!!

Yes looking at the map it is near Derby Road (its Brinton Terrace off St Mary's Road)....but as I have no visual-spatial skills I am crap at maps!

The only places I know how to get to in So'ton are West Quay, Ocean's Village (where I used to park to walk to the football ground) and M&S at Hedge End. I am a thoroughly lost cause! Usually go into So'ton with dh thus he drives and I pay no attention to where we are going. I think it must be genetic because although my mum has an unendorsed driving licence she lost her bottle and stopped driving anywhere at all circa 20 years ago.

Anyway, my boss has been down subsequently to see me about something else and she seemed quite cheery so she must have believed my excuse for not going...(unless she was cheery because she has just prepared my P45!)

hmc,

I often like to suss out the parking situation before I know I have to go somewhere by a specific time. In your circumstances I would feel the same, both about the spontaneity and the hassle of parking. If parking is that bad and could potentially make you late for a meeting then I would have thought that the cost of a taxi would be outweighed by the inefficient use of your time. Could you car share with someone else attending or alternate meetings between your location and the hospital so at least you won't have the travel problem every time. If it helps I usually find that after the first couple of times the stress eases.

At least you get to drive your own car! My boss sent me out in his Vectra one day and I just could not find reverse gear. I had to phone him up, blush. It turned out to be one of those lift-and-push gearsticks, easy peasy when someone tells you how!

I'd also thought of Janh's idea; drive as close as poss then taxi it the rest of the way.