What should I say?

[Ilovesparklystuff]

I wonder if any of you ladies can help me.

One of my good friends has just had a healthy baby girl. Obviously I am delighted for her, but the birth happened very close (within a week) to the 2nd anniversary of the stillbirth of her first child. I want to send her a congratulations card (obviously) but last year I sent her a 'thinking of you' type card for the anniversary, and would have done this year too.

Now my question is, should I send two seperate cards, or would this look a bit off, or should I write a little message in the congratulations card, and if so what should I say? I know she will be thrilled about the new baby, but her first baby will also be very much in her mind so I don't want to gloss over that.

Please help me get this right as she's a wonderful person who deserves lots of happiness.

TIA x

Oh gosh, this is such a difficult thing I think. It is truly down to the individual, I don't think there's any hard and fast rule.

I guess you know her best so you're the best one to make the decision. I'm sorry, I know that's not terribly helpful.

I guess you know her best so you're the best one to make the decision. I'm sorry, I know that's not terribly helpful.

why not send a congratulations card for the baby
and buy a small plant, rose bush in memory of the stillbirth.That way it might stop the awkwardness every year iykwim(trying to put it into nice words but cant at mo sorry) I dont know whether your friend wants to be reminded of what happened every year or not.
You sound like a very good friend though and i am sure you will do what is right in your friendship.

Sorry for the multiple posts. Doormat's idea is a wonderful one.

Agree with doormat. A rosebush that can be planted will be long-term and you will have this issue every year when dd's birthday comes around. How sad though.

Thanks ladies.

Love the rose idea Doormat. It would be great if I could find a rose with the same name as my friend's dd1. I'll start looking now.

She wears her heart on her sleeve so I think she'll want to be reminded every year IYKWIM. She's definitely not one for bottling up her feelings. She's said before how important it is to her that people remember her dd1 as she will always be her first child.

Anyway, thanks again for the advice.

x