Racism in Britain

[Ranirma]

(Sorry, this has turned out rather long!)
I am a caucasian British woman living in Paris with my Bangladeshi husband and our very happy five and a half month old daughter. One of my big worries for her is the future of relations between the West and the East and as a consequence the future of relations between Muslims and Christians everywhere.
I abhor racism and discrimination in all forms but, being a woman who values her independence, I have to admit to a certain amount of prejudice against Muslims, especially Muslim men. It was an accident that I fell in love with one! (It has made me question a lot of my perceptions, although I should say that he is as Muslim as I am catholic ie not very!). The early part of this year was very positive for us. Shahin found the courage to tell his family about us and, to our surprise, they accepted me with open hearts and open minds. Our Rani was born and Shahin obtained his residents permit for France, so we were able to visit England together for the first time. I had always felt that Asians were well integrated and accepted in the UK and that racism was an isolated problem of a minority of violent and ignorant individuals. However, this July, travelling around southern England in the wake of this summers riots in the north with my dark skinned husband and our olive skinned, dark haired baby (my hair and skin are very fair), I felt looks of mistrust and even hatred from both communities. Since the horrific events of the 11th of September and the over the top and badly thought through response of politicians and media (subject of another discussion), I begin to seriously worry about the future happiness of my daughter if we move back to England as planned. I have seen reports of mosques and women attacked, heard of cries for death to all Muslims and even of a Seek man attacked because he resembled bin Laden!
Do any of you have similar worries? Or can any of you reassure me that all our children will understand that there is good and bad in every culture and that we should treat all people as individuals what ever their religion, culture or colour.

No not really. I understand the problem but all religions have different factions. I knew someone who I thought was perfectly nice who was adamant that women shouldn't be priests - didn't think she was nice after that. I had a row once with a Jehovah's Witness at school because she was homophobic because her religion tells her to be. Yet of course there are many JWs who reject that nonsense.

The same people who attacks Sikh people for those reasons are the same people who attack convicted criminals. As a change to beating up their partner on a Saturday night. Scum!

Out of interest Ranirma, do you really see the situation in the UK as regards Muslims any worse than in France?. I live in central London in a borough in which 45% are from ethnic minorities - the single biggest group of which by far are Bengali's. Personally, I have always found it to be a harmonious community and don't recognise your description of your summer trip to the UK. When you say SOuthern England, were you in London or in rural areas?.

I'm sure that we have all come across some form of racism at some point in our lives. My experience was living in Aberdeen and being ignored or insulted because I was English. It is really difficult Ranirma to ease your worries for you. We all hope that racism will gradually fade out in time, but this is not the case, as it seems to be human nature to want to better themselves by treading on others. My niece is currently being bullied at school, her confidence is being knocked and her self esteem lowered, just so that the bullies can feel good about themselves.
So I know it is of no consolation to you, but we are all victims of 'racism' or bullying in some degree and I really don't think that it will ever go away.

Sorry I sound so pessimistic, it's just the way I feel at the minute. Good luck Ranirma, we're not all racists and I hope that you find some good friends here in England.

Well, thatnks all for your messages. I guess that racism / discrimination is indeed a problem that is here to stay - just have to remember that there are plenty of nice reasonable people out there too. It's just a shame that the blame for the 11th of september has been so squarely placed on the muslim religion. People don't go around attacking catholics in America after every IRA bombing! or do they ?

Patience - we were in Bambury, London and rural west country. I too always felt that our multicultural society was harmonious and was proud of that - I used to live just behind the Mosque in Whitechapel and was very happy there. It was only when I was with my husband that I noticed the suspicious looks. I think that it was perhaps an understandable result of the riots, and also that the Bengali community still has problems with mixed marriages. France is racist too but in a much less violent and more institutionalised way. I think there has been less back lash here about the WTC because they have less sympathy with the US.