vasectomy - how do i persuade him to do it?

[mousie]

Any ideas? I have two kids, horrible pregnancies, lousy babies, have had no sleep for five years. The thought of having another baby is just not something i can begin to contemplate. My mirena fell out during a smear recently (another story) and I am tired of being the one who has done the contraception for years. I would love dh to have a vasectomy - he is 37 and agrees with me that we have two kids and that is enough. However goes green at the mere mention of the word. Anyone any ideas of how to persuade him it's his turn and a good idea?!

and how many possible poor outcomes from female sterilisation? I don't wish to belittle anyone's bad experiences (Lasvega that sounds awful ;(, but all surgical procedures carry some risk, and you need to consider whether you are happy with this beforehand. Our weighting time (SE London) was about two months from the consultation with the GP to the operation.

god it's a tricky one. I would feel terrible if anything went wrong or he was in lots of pain ( a little would see fair compensation for not having had to have childbirth..)

any other ideas? Mirena has failed me and I think I have just had too many years on the pill.

For a woman, the MAJOR complication that can result is an ectopic pregnancy.

This happened to two of my mum's friends, and as they were in their mid-40s, they chalked up their missed periods to the onset of menopause.

Both wound up with near life-threatening ruptures, emergency hysterectomies and sepsis afterwards.

Not good.

mousie - I'm in your shoes. dh is totally against it and even more so since they showed the procedure on GMTV about 8 weeks ago. I've left it for a while but am making him use condoms which he moans about so maybe he'll come round coz of this.

you'd think GMTV would be on our side! condoms not really that inspiring are they, though they have certain advantages..

Tee Hee - yeah, I can roll over and go to sleep and not have to sleep in the wet patch

Nope, it just doesn't have any semem in it.

DP describes it as "tatty water" as opposed to "full bodied"

Dead romantic!! One of the reasons I fell for him!!!

Haven't read the whole thread but my sister made her dh have one by witholding sex.

Not an ultimatum I'd give but useful if you're desperate, I suppose.

When he wakes up, let the first thing he sees be you standing over him brandishing a meat cleaver!

Mousie, my dh had it done in october, with no pain afterwards at all, though he took a lot of arnica, which worked. He was reluctant to lose his 'fertility' in case things went wrong, but eventually saw things my way. I asked a lot of girlfriends and they all said sex was WAY better afterwards, so that helped him! My Finnish friend's advice, however, is" no Sex, no Supper, no Sympathy" - worked for her..........

Expat in scotland - what do you mean about ectopic pregnancies - is this vasectomy-related? I don't quite understand... thanks x

No, ectopic pregnancy can be a complication of female sterilisation. Has nothing to do w/a male having had a vasectomy. In terms of a potentially lethal complications or effects of sterilisation, it's far more likely in the case of a female than a male.

Male sterlisation is vastly more effective, cheaper and less risky.

thank you - that's what I needed to hear!