daftest comment made when you were in school

[Blandmum]

either by staff or student.

By my biology teacher 'If you put two pins in the back of your hand you may only feel one prick'

BIG mistake!

College, my professor was lecturing - his zip was open, everyone was giggling.. he says "if you dont all stop laughing, an ugly thing is going to rear its head here today!!!"....

Need I say more.

not a comment

but still makes me ROFL

Mrs Abbot came storming into the science lab, slammed the door, saying 'Will YOU BE quiet' and then the clock fell on her head.

has quite cheered me up remembering that

Enid LMAO! Stonking, great stuff!

PMSL at all of these so far!

Remember science teacher telling us NOT to put the magnets anywhere near the iron shavings or it would ruin the magnets........

Four of us girls sitting in the corner were laughing at the supply teacher because she obviously had a dodgy bra on that made herlook like she had four breasts she turned round to us and shouted "will you four boobies in the corner be quiet!" You can imagine the reaction!

pmsl @ edodgy

A ruler is for one thing and one thing only

drawing straight lines and measuring them.

I hope none of you have seen the dog out there

because I haven't.

Previous headteacher of my school, using a new, unfamiliar public address system to address the whole school from his office (my mother, who taught at the school, swears that she heard all of these):

1. The toilets are for your use, not your abuse.
2. I can hear you not listening to me.
3. If I see any chewing gum around the school, I intend to stamp on it.
4. [On running through the school rules]. "Girls may not wear any jewelry except a watch". His comment on this: Girls who wear jewelry can easily conceive ....[extremely long pause] of the effect it will produce.

Sorry, the first one was 'The toilets are for your abuse, not your use.'

A (teacher) friend of mine asked her primary school class what they were all laughing about. The instigator of the hilarity piped up "Me and Susan went home for lunch miss and mummy and daddy were at it on the sofa!!"

At my convent we were told that if we looked out of the window at boys we would get pregnant!

lolol @ bobbybob

and i dont even get them

not a funny comment, but a horrible one ...

my brother's teacher told him that he "was useless and never would amount to anything at all"

he is now a fantastic father of four boys, and a decorated senior military officer who has done loads of work for the UN and peace keeping

(ps. my mum had the teacher fired)

At college we were doing a wine course, and the tutor brought in loads of bottles. When he commented 'Look at the lovely flange on that' We all pi**ed ourselves and didn't reagine composure for the rest of the lesson

LOL at 'flange'

What a great word. Why is it so funny???

koala I had a teacher say the same thing to me and when I returned to the same high school as a prac teacher during my post grad course kept asking me where he knew me from as my face was familiar.....

we once had a supply teacher who sat through an entire lesson reading his paper, making us sit in silence. all of a sudden he came out with some complete garbled tripe, expression of shock type thing (i guess he was thinking out loud) then he giggled, literally "he he he" in a really high voice. i started to snigger, so did my friend, then the whole class burst out laughing. he went very red, folded up his paper and quietly left the room. he didnt come back.

I met a friend at uni for coffee and he was ashen .. turns out the day before he'd been in a lecture with a particularly dull and obnoxious professor and had mumbled at him 'oh f' off and die'

that morning, he'd just been for a tutorial and found out the bloke had ... died that is