Complete dilema, don't know what to do? Advice needed please....

[HousingAdvice]

Firstly i have changed my name for a couple of reasons but i am quite a regular here and just would like some advice/help.

My dilema is, I live in privatly rented accomadation with my child & am 8 months pregnant with my second child. I have a partner (who is the father to my first child & this baby) but we don't live together. The reason for this is because when i fell pregnant with our first child my partner was heavily involved in drugs & violent because of this. So i made the decision when i was 5 months pregnant with our first child to leave him & bring up our child on my own, anyway in the end he actually left the house we were renting together, so i stayed and the council paid my rent for me.

Anyway this was 5 years ago, i have since moved house twice with my child and we have lived very happily since then & got on with life without his dad. Now in the last 2 years his dad has been off the drugs and is a totally changed man, he works full time and has done for 1 year now he sees our child and has been in his life for about the past 2 years & is the best possible Dad, Partner anyone could ask for. (changed man)

We have been back together now for 1 year, but not living together i live in privatly rented house and the council pay my rent as i am on full benefits, my partner rents a room from his work mate and lives about 30 mins from us, we do see each other quite a bit and spend many weekends toegther.

Are next baby is due around christmas & obviously we want to be a family again but and thats a big BUT....

My dilema is this, i have phoned the council to put my name on the housing list as my partner says on his wages we can not afford to rent this house i am in and pay all bills, bring up 2 kids etc etc etc...

So my questions are...

Will the council help house us even if i am in accomadation and my tenancy does not run out till sept 2006, but we are a split family who want to be together but can not afford £800 a month rent plus council tax, bills, debts etc?

Is this a really silly move for me to make? should i just stay how i am? and live just seeing him now & then?

Also when our first child was born i was interviewed by the CSA & i asked them not to contact my childs dad for money as i feared for our safety due to his drug abuse & violence, I won this & they have never contacted him, but he has never paid me any money will this effect us now we are back together?

I wanted him to be around and living with us completly when this baby arrived as i am struggling and need the company, help but this is just totally impossible with where we live.

What can i do? i feel totally depressed, alone & am getting desperate as really need dp here with us

Hi housingadvice - so sorry to hear about your situation, it sounds v stressful

Would you be officially overcrowded in your current accommodation if dp moves in with you? If so that might boost your chances of getting public housing. Also what area do you live in? Some areas have much longer waiting lists than others, so it's a lot harder to get housing unless you are homeless.

Could you go to the CAB or your local Housing Advice office and discuss your situation with them?

Thanks spcaedonkey.

No we would not be over crowded i live in 3 bedroom house we only use 2 at the moment.

We live in the southeast not sure about waiting list my friend and her partner who are due to have a baby in december is well have just been awarded a 2 beedroom house.

Do you think i should just take the risk and fill the form out and see what they say?

I am scared if anything, but i would like us all to be together as a family and not all split apart with dp 30 mins away from us. I am starting to really need him now

I would say don't fill out any forms until you are sure how the change of circumstances will affect your benefits. If dp is on a lowish wage, you will qualify for tax credits - I think if you go to the tax credits website you can find out how much you will be entitled to without having to actually apply. Certainly the CAB could help you with this. But do make sure you won't be worse off before you actually fill out any forms!

I live in the south east as well, and the only way I could get public housing was by declaring myself homeless. It was a bit of a nightmare at the time, but I'm glad it happened now because now I have cheap and most importantly secure accommodation. Private renting always felt insecure to me, and that's not good when you're raising a family. Again, the CAB will be able to advise you on how to go about getting public housing.

be careful with the tax credit website i filled in online application and it just didnt add up as it was awarding us lower than we were currently getting, and i was putting in less income. Rang them up and they were really helpful did a calculation for me based on what our money will bew in march and it worked out about £3000 more than online. She said that online was not accurate.

Good luck with the housing we are facing similar situation. our house comes with the job and in march we loose the job, the house the car. Scared stiff and not a clue what to do seems our council have 8000 properties and 11000 on the list apparantly. We too will never be able to afford private rent and dont think we stand a hope of a mortgage at the mo.