I just worry....

[binker]

...about everything, though mostly I am able to be rational and deal with things fairly calmly. However the past month or so has been difficult, not through any major trauma or catastrophe, simply just feeling overwhelmed by anxiety ! It's mostly focussed on what must seem like fairly trivial domestic things (though I have to admit that I'm also very anxious at the moment about work related things) - I have got myself into a state of almost constantly worrying about whether things will go wrong in the house (ie. central heating packing up/ pipes leaking/ washing machine breaking down) and how I might deal with it when it happens - it keeps going round and round in my head ! A few things like this have happened recently, so maybe that is the trigger, also our house is on the market which is another bit of stress. Sorry if this sounds very silly, but it makes me feel a little better to share it !

Me, too, Binker. You aren't a Virgo as well, are you?

funny you should mention being a virgo, zebra. I'm one and i too used to worry constantly (especially when dd was tiny, but I guess that's normal).

But lately I've rebelled against my Virgoan persona and become the most slack mother/householder ever.

Can't say how i did it really, but I think stress is a factor - let's hope you get that house sold sharpish, binker!

Bet if you look back over your life that the things you have worried about have never happened! It's easy to let things take over and become bigger worries than they need be. Don't waste another moment on worrying about your household appliances - they're unlikely to pack up, and if they do, you just get them fixed! Think the house selling is what's underlying it all - it's a stressful time.

My DH is a Virgo and never worries - I on the other hand (Aries) do all the time about stuff that hopefully will never happen - DS getting run over/falling out of windows/DH or me dying and various other stupid things. I hate myself for it but it is just the way i am. A lot of women are real worriers and i'm not sure how to get out of the spiral. I really wish i could be one of those happy-go-lucky types but i'm just not.

However your feelings of anxiety sound maybe a little different - probably stress related due to all the stuff going on in your life.

But just to let you know you are not alone!

Zebra - YES ! I AM A VIRGO (it's my birthday on Wednesday !) -and thanks Lucy123 and bluecow - you both talk good sense - and I'm sure the house move is probably a big factor behind it (we're taking the house off the market at the end of this month if there are no sensible offers - it's been on for about five months). I just feel so knotted up and on edge much of the time which isn't usual for me- though I worry a lot I can generally keep it sensibly at bay.

and tallgirl,thanks - it is nice to know I'm not alone - you can be sure that you'll get comfort and reassurance on mumsnet !

Tallgirl - are you me? I am Aries and worry like mad about the stupidest things, like finding a parking space when I go somewhere - DH is Virgo and thinks I'm ridiculous (but then people pull out of parking spaces just as he arrives places!) - I used to hesitate to let the children have eg sharp knives when they were small - he let 2 of them use a hot-air paint stripper! etc etc.

(AND I am vv tall...)!

I'm not that tall (5ft 8ish) but used that nickname when sending DH a card once - anyway - i dont worry so much about car parking spaces but not so much of the other thing. mind you DH has been having trouble sleeping and thinking about work etc over the last few months so he can talk.

The trouble is it is completely pointless and a waste of energy (worrying that is). i worried about what to take on holiday for ages which wasnt worth it. HOliday was a bit crap and we lost our luggage for a day which is more worth worrying about!

God, I love this website! I am a worrier too! I went into therapy two years ago and had to fill out several questionnaires. In the end, I was actually diagnosed with what the therapist considered a mild anxiety disorder with obsessive compulsive tendencies (I think the reason for the obsessive compulsive thing is that I answered yes to straighting crooked pictures in the doctor's office waiting room). Things just tend to build up gradually and I seem to get more and more sensitive, hence anxious and worry constantly. I couldn't take my DD to the beach until she was 4 because I kept seeing her getting sucked into the waves when I turned my head for one second, I was afraid of being in huge crowds and losing her somehow, etc. I could think of a million things that sound so strange now, but at the time they were so real to me. When trying to sell a home, you want it to look just right to show it, you never know when the agent will call to show it, is nerve racking!! Kids will be kids, they can't help it and things are left out and it looks cluttered, laundry has to be put away immediately, the stove has to be clean, the buyers might open the closetsit is like a domino thing. When you realize that you are worrying about things that you know you don't have control over, it is kind of like a wake-up call to me to try to re-evaluate what is going on and try to reduce the stress somewhere if it is possible. Please don't feel alone in this! We worriers are a gifted bunch, because we are so senstive and compassionate and forward-thinking, planning for the worst people. I have to have at least 3 tins of beans, not one but threejust in caseso no one should be hungry. I keep a runing list,if we are down a can, the beans go on the listit is laughable--but you can always know where to go for a tin of beans!

sunchowder - yes, I can identify with what you say - when I was pregnant I fretted the entire time ! I am much better about things like safety/health etc with regard to my son and husband - though once I've stopped worrying about whether my central heating wont work- I switch on to more serious stuff like people dying or being ill which is a torment. I have to confess to having OCD (obsessional compulsive disorder) - have had it on and off since my twenties but I know that it's 'in remission' right now - though obsessional tendencies sneak out when I'm stressed. (I have had cognitive behaviour therapy plus treatment with fluvoxamine and this worked really well for me). Actually, since posting this thread earlier today, I feel a lot better - the magic of mumsnet, must be like a confessional (that'll be my lapsed Catholic bit coming through !!) thanks everyone !

is virgo now? My pal is real worrier and she has just had her b day

Another one then!

Just came across this thread and am glad that there are other people out there like me. Sometimes i think I'm going mad because i worry about the most simple things,

Jan H - I laughed out loud when i read your comments as i too worry about where I will park the car, the worry trebles if there is also a passenger in the car with me! But I'm an aquarian and only 5'2. I used to worry about my younger brother all the time (he's 22!) but since I have had my ds all the worry has gone on to him.

PS: I'm becoming addicted to mumsnet, even when I'm at my desk and should be working I keep having a sneaky peek for an update

i agree with most on here too about worrying but i sit and worry about things i've done in the past.I ALWAYS worry about dd and her going to school and adults she'll meet.........but sometimes i'll remember something about hte past then it'll be a train of thought and i'll feel sick.............(i haven't killed anybody or anything just done lots of things i wish i hadn;t and having a daughter brings it home to me.........)

I'm a virgo too and an avid worrier. I would worry if I had nothing to worry about IYKWIM!

i agree with most on here too about worrying but i sit and worry about things i've done in the past.I ALWAYS worry about dd and her going to school and adults she'll meet.........but sometimes i'll remember something about hte past then it'll be a train of thought and i'll feel sick.............(i haven't killed anybody or anything just done lots of things i wish i hadn;t and having a daughter brings it home to me.........)

i agree with most on here too about worrying but i sit and worry about things i've done in the past.I ALWAYS worry about dd and her going to school and adults she'll meet.........but sometimes i'll remember something about hte past then it'll be a train of thought and i'll feel sick.............(i haven't killed anybody or anything just done lots of things i wish i hadn;t and having a daughter brings it home to me.........)

I am an ex-worrier. I have a cute book that I read that helped called: Sorting Out Worry by Grant Brecht. It is on Amazon here .It has some excellent chapters such as 'Taking Control - controlling your attitudes and beliefs' and 'Taking Control - techniques and ideas' and even a chapter 'Living with a Worrier' for your dh/dp. It is very practical and has little forms and everything for you to fill out to not just think about it but take action to fix it. Hope this helps you beat the Worry Monster!