Etiquette question for Jewish mumsnetters

[Medea]

I'm having a dinner party for 10 or 12 on Saturday. Two of the guests are Jewish. They've already said they don't eat meat, so I plan to have a vegetarian entree and lots of vegetarian sides. But because the group is big, and because quite a few of the guests do eat meat, I'm also planning to do a pork roast I can cook over 24 hours--because I'm stressed and it seems to be easy.

Will the inclusion of pork in the menu offend the Jewish guests? Will the presence of pork on the table/in the kitchen affect their ability to eat the other food on offer?

I'm actually not that ignorant of Jewish customs, having grown up in a Jewish neighborhood in NY and having a lot of Jewish friends generally. But I've never faced this particular conundrum of having a dinner party where I plan to serve pork. I'm pretty sure if it were me I'd just eat what I could eat and not mind about what others ate, but I know kosher laws can be tricky. . .

i have no idea about Jewish etiquette but I wouldnt serve Pork just to be on the safe side. I also remember something about certain foods not being on the same plate. Not very helpful but will bump you until someone comes along who knows.

Isn't it about keeping dairy and meat separate - some very orthodox Jewish people keep separate kitchens, one for dairy, one for meat.

I'd ask your friends, tbh.

Not Jewish myself but I do know that if they are very orthodox in this practice they will not be able to eat off plates that have previously had non kosher foods on them. Paper pates may be a good way round this.

If nothing else I think it would be tactless to serve Pork.

Not only is the prohibition on pork, but also shellfish and you cannot mix meat and dairy products in a meal

Medae, you can do that v slow cook recipe with some lamb cuts, too. I think it is in a delia book, with pomegranate.

Kosher food guidance

If they were very orthodox, they wouldn't eat at Medea's house. I used to work with someone who was very orthodox, and he would just have juice if he was out and about, somewhere not-kosher. Nobody would expect to be provided plates that hadn't been used in an un-orthodox kitchen. (If they were that strict, of course, all Medea's pans are unacceptable, too.)

A vegetarian diet is reasonably kosher.

As others have said, I wouldn't serve anything really treyf like Pork. Lamb is safer. But they probably don't care.

I would also make sure that the vegetarian dishes are thoroughly vegetarian - no gelatine in the desserts, no meat stock in the soup. But you no doubt know that.

A friend of mine who doesn't eat pork for religious reasons (she's actually Muslim, not Jewish but there may be parallels) would feel quite queasy if pork was served at a meal even if she didn't eat it herself. She sees pork as 'dirty' meat and is quite revolted by the whole idea of eating it or being around it. So may be best avoided.

I don't know about Jewish people but my former brother in law was Muslim, and he would have been very offended to see pork on the table - he would have refused to eat with us and would probably have refused to even be in the house. It could be seen as rather tactless on your part to have pork on the table knowing that your friends are Jewish and there are issues around pork for them.

Surely it would be better to either ask them whether it would be acceptable to them, or to err on the side of caution and have something else? There must be something else that you could cook that's just as easy as roast pork.

I'd ask them myself if I hadn't lost their phone number, and if she checked email more often. I need to order whatever it is form the butcher within the next few hours.

You've all convinced me against pork. I think you're right, too. . .that was my inclination. Thanks, everyone.

As a Jewish person (albeit a non-observant one who doesn't eat meat anyway!) I think it's really nice of you to have even thought about it--so many people wouldn't have made the effort.

You need to know if they are orthodox, liberal whatever and really, you do need to speak to them. To be exact, you couldn't prepare food on the same services, use the same sutlery, same sink, and some Jewish people prefer to use paper plates as Jewish people have separate plates at home fo meat and dairy, coz it's not just the pork factor, it's the meat and d airy thing too.

I am not Jewish though, am studying it for my degree atm so may be misinformed by tutors. But there seem to be so many levels of observancy that you really do need to ask. I am sure they'll be pleased you are so considerate.

Bet you change your menu to avoid all these potential pitfalls and then discover they are so liberal, or lapsed, that they merrily eat bacon sarnies and couldn't give a toss about who else eats what!

Once got my former boss into trouble by answering the phone to his mum and saying, 'Oh, he won't be long, he's just nipped out to fetch a bacon sarnie'... Well, how was I to know he was Jewish, he'd never mentioned it!

Medea, you should have said this earlier BEFORE we created a huge menu for you

I am jewish and hav eno probs with pork, but I wouldn'tserve it to anyone I knew was jewish, or at a party where people wewre jewish. Don't serve the prawn things either, sorry, shellfish is off the menu too!!

So, backto the drawing board. Are you still doing a mushroom stroganoff? If so do a beef one too. Again can be pre-cooked the day before and it almost foolproof.

Good luck

I wouldn't worry about the rest of it,they won't have a problem with your plates etc otherwise they wouldn'tcome to your house.