Yes, I saw her this morning.
I'd been trying to think of away to say it that wasn't too harsh, patronising(sp?) and interferring but everything was, so I said
"XXXX, look I've thought long and hard about this and I know it's going to make me into a busy-body and an interferring hag but I have to say it. If it means you never speak to me again then so be it, I'm willing to pay the price.........What you're doing with DS in the big carseat it really dangerous!, if you are in any kind of accident, even a tiny one then he will be very seriously injured. It absolutely terrifies me to see him in that seat, I'm really scraed that he'll be hurt because although you are a safe driver not eeveryone else is"
We talked about it for a while and TBH I think she just hadn't thought of the concequences. She said he seemed uncomfortable in the first size carseat so put him in the big one for more space etc even though she read 20lbs plus on the actual seat.
She drives a massive 4x4 and asked if he would still be hurt in such a big car. I said "Yes, you're car will probably come off ok but DS will still be hurt"
In the end she thanked me for telling her and said she'd change back because I told her this. I said she could check all sorts of places for the same info(mothercare, maxicosi etc ) and not to just take me word for it because I didn't want to preach to her(even though I was!!).
Then I felt like right bitch because she started crying. It wasn't the result I expected...I was more prepared for her to tell me to F off. She said she just didn't know.
I feel very glad that I've told her and I'm so releived she'd changed the carseat back (it was on mt mind all day yesterday and the minute I woke up) but absolultey awful that I made her cry and that I've bitched about her so badly on here.