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Original poster

Men and washing machines

89 replies

motherinferior · 12/09/2003 11:16

Just out of interest, can anyone tell me of a sole heterosexual male who can do the washing properly - the full thing, you know, sorting different colours/temperatures rather than bunging everything in at 60 degrees; putting in suitable loads (and taking the prevous load away and putting the clothes in the right places rather than leaving everything on the racks or lines, or at the very best piled up chaotically on the bed); taking it out and hanging it up; and finally putting this lot away too?

And if so, can I have him stuffed and put in a museum?????????

OP posts:
dadslib · 15/09/2003 13:24

Message withdrawn

Gumdrop · 15/09/2003 13:42

Well I didn't do any of the things listed (but I can - some women even have engineering degrees you know)- but over the weekend I did put 100 bales of hay into the garage, lay a concrete path, build a section of dry stone wall, plant bulbs, and all the washing and ironing.

Does that entitle me to be just a tiny bit smug and p'd off about dh's blind faith in the "washing fairy"?

Janstar · 15/09/2003 14:16

dadslib, I have done several of the jobs on your list - in fact I actually built a new floor once, when a section had rotted in my last house. I'm talking about a gaping hole with a 6' cavity underneath. I think many of us cross over the traditional male/female territory these days. And so we should. It gives all of us more of a chance to do stuff we like instead of being trapped into chores we are traditionally expected to do. But it only works if both partners are happy with the arrangement. My dh isn't bad with housework, but it took a lot of training. However I am well aware that some husbands resist training with every fibre of their being. I know I'm lucky.

aloha · 15/09/2003 14:56

Blimey Gumdrop, I wouldn't know where to start! Mind you, I suspect neither would dh - but shhh! don't tell him I said that...

Philippat · 15/09/2003 14:57

dadslib

  1. only if they are likely to have loose dye (ie you dyed it yourself) or you wash at more than 40 degrees
  2. yes, if you do it the first wash after the stain occurs. Plus 40 degrees does not kill off dust mites or thrush so good for bedding/pants etc
  3. bear minimum is what you need to impress your boss

I very much doubt I could do anything on your list except change the fuse, but somehow I think dh would be even worse at it than me.

However, he's a master with the vacuum (I can't work out how the dyson works at all).

SoupDragon · 15/09/2003 15:22

Dadslib,

  1. checked the oil in your car?
    Every single time I get in it. It has a little display that says "Oil OK" when I put the keycard in! As it happens, I do know where the dipstick is and I'm not just referring to my completely car knowledge free DH

  2. clipped the hedges?
    Early this summer. Again, this is a "pink job" in our house (as opposed to a blue job) although having said that, the nice man next door came and did it last time as it's his hedge.

  3. laid a wood floor?
    Me again! I laid the laminate floor in DS1s nursery.

  4. plumbed in a new bathroom?
    OK, you've got ne there but in my defense, DH couldn't do this either.

  5. moved the washing machine, when required?
    Me again (and B**r me it was heavy!)

  6. changed a fuse in the iron?
    A couple of months ago!

Ahhh... I feel all smug and independent now! I also put up shelves, paint rooms and replace light fittings. DH mows the lawn but only because he foolishly bought a mower that wasn't self-propelled.

SoupDragon · 15/09/2003 15:24

I once did a spot of plastering too, does that count?

aloha · 15/09/2003 15:28

Blimey Gumdrop, I wouldn't know where to start! Mind you, I suspect neither would dh - but shhh! don't tell him I said that...

Original poster
motherinferior · 15/09/2003 20:04

Soupy....cor. Just COR.

The thing about washing is it has to be done most days, at least it does in the baby-ridden Inferiority Complex. I am absolutely terrible at all the other stuff, I have to admit.

DP now doing fatherly stuff with dd2, while I do Bloke Computer things

OP posts:
marthamoo · 15/09/2003 20:21

Dh knows where the washing machine is. I think.

We've had a dishwasher over a year though and I don't believe he's noticed as he still puts the dirty dishes by the sink (on the opposite side of the kitchen). And if he has noticed we have a dishwasher, he certainly thinks it's self-emptying.

He doesn't cook and he doesn't clean.

I think I need a New Man. Or maybe just a new man

Eowyn · 15/09/2003 21:52

I'm desperate for a moan & here seems just right.
Yesterday the washing line fell down, all clothes on wet grass, I was a tad annoyed as if I had a rotary line this wouldn't happen but dh says "i don't want a rotary line" - well no, he doesn't do any of the washing so i guess he doesn't.
Today the washing machine flooded, I had just mopped it up when he opened the door to it & the most collossal flood engulfed the kitchen Again.
I did not say a word, just cleaned it all up again.
He had strung up a new clothes line but panicked when i said i was going to hang wet clothes on it & i had to spend ages wring out by hand before allowed to use it.
He wonders why I am permanantly snarling at him.

fisil · 15/09/2003 21:58

Dadslib, I do all those jobs (except anything in the garden - I want to concrete it all over). DP only ever drives in extreme circumstances (i.e. to the hospital with me in labour) so wouldn't have a clue about oil etc. The one all male job in our house is finances - I sadly confess to having only a dim idea of what our bills come to!

DP does contribute to every stage of washing, cooking, washing up etc. - just not all in one go. So he'll put a load on, and a week later it would still be sitting in the machine. And last week I found some summer clothes still "drying" on the clothes horse several weeks later.

misdee · 15/09/2003 23:00

dadslib, my answers.

... checked the oil in your car?
the other week b4 i lean it to my wonmderful brother, i also checked the battery, and amde sure thing were running smoothly (as yet i still havent passed my test). i have also changed tyres on cars.
... clipped the hedges?
in my old house we took in turns with the lawn mower and the hedge clippers.

... laid a wood floor?
a few weeks ago for my ex hubby. next place to do is my own flat.
... plumbed in a new bathroom?
not on my own, but will help when required.

... moved the washing machine, when required?
can do it, just have no need.

... changed a fuse in the iron?

never had a iron go wrong.

Bogwoppit · 15/09/2003 23:13

Well we have total role reversal in our house. It is me that mows the lawn, builds the furniture, does DIY etc. DH does cleaning, ironing etc. Though I tend to do washing cos I am home all day.

today I spent the afternoon mowing the lawns & this evening while I was out DH tidied up the mess from DS toys!!!

I gues what ever works best for you. I have been asked before if DH will do lessons for other DH/DP in housework

bloss · 15/09/2003 23:30

Message withdrawn

jodee · 15/09/2003 23:41

It's absolutely no good asking dh to do anything (other than washing up) - If I say 'can you please do XYZ?' he will nod or say yes, but it will never get done - not that he doesn't mean it when he says 'yes', but his brain isn't programmed to remember things like unblocking the drain or cleaning the heads on the video.
But if I give him a LIST - ta da!!!! He has to see it in black and white - in big letters preferably...

Mooma · 16/09/2003 07:29

As I am reading this I realise that my dh is an almost-obsolete 1950s model...a bit of an antique in fact. It is a real eye-opener to read these postings and see how much things have changed...sadly not in our house. My dh can wash up and tidy a kitchen after a meal, hang out and take in laundry, and is in charge of the recycling, and that's it. Washing machine, hoover, oven...all are foreign territory to him. I'm sitting here feeling a bit aggrieved and wondering whether to blame myself or his mum!

Lilysmum · 16/09/2003 08:25

Mine irons and cuts the grass - that's it!

doormat · 16/09/2003 08:35

DadslibLOL
The only thing a man is useful for is his wage packet

bobsmum · 16/09/2003 09:12

Lilysmum - mine cuts the grass but he's certainly never ironed it

Lilysmum · 16/09/2003 10:22

Bobsmum

You cheeky thing! (lol)

Lilysmum · 16/09/2003 10:22

Bobsmum

You cheeky thing! (lol)

dinosaur · 16/09/2003 10:44

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

dadslib · 16/09/2003 12:57

Message withdrawn

Philippat · 16/09/2003 13:13

dadslib, I like to think one day we won't have blue and pink roles, we'll just be people and partnerships.

But 40 years is a very short time to achieve equality. Women are still struggling under glass ceilings we need to fight. If men need a new role, they need to find it themselves (hell, we're mothers, we know if you tell 'em one thing they'll just go and do the reverse to spite us). If that means a boxer-burning campaign in a few decades, you have my support.