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Original poster

What do you say to your boss when you disagree???

19 replies

busybusybee · 13/10/2005 21:58

ie When your boss talks to you about something important - and you really disagree, think hes wrong, barking up the wrong tree etc - Do you say so?

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colditz · 13/10/2005 22:01

I say "Oh right. Because I thought......"

But I work in Care, and we are allowed to challenge people if we think they are wrong, as it might be life or death - ie "Oh right. Because I thought the doctor said to stop giving X tablets because they are causing X."

We may get labelled cheeky, but I don't care. It's important to speak up in that situation.

startingtobehalloweenylover · 13/10/2005 22:01

yes

Original poster
busybusybee · 13/10/2005 22:07

I work in a care context too!

Trouble is my boss is the kind of person who "knows" he is right about everything
However much you try to disagree, with whatever argument - how ever carefully thought out and brilliant i might think it is - I always seem to loose

Its so frustrating

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BigGayDad · 13/10/2005 22:10

You're talking bollox f**kwit!! But only if I don't feel there is any more I can contribute to the new organisation and need to move on!!

Tortington · 13/10/2005 22:12

yes - but it depends on the boss, however i have always been a gob shite - i think a reasoned argument is the best way to go - or say " playing devils advocate" or " i heard someone mention..."

do it third party if it gets you out of the shit.

soapbox · 13/10/2005 22:13

I always say something like 'oh you know that I think you are usually right - well I'm afraid this time I really disagree with you because of xyz.'

Butters them up a bit and makes them listen seriously to them.

Gomez · 13/10/2005 22:15

Always. You could try the

'Have you considered xxxxxxxxxxxxx as an alternative?'

OR

'I have concerns with this approach, specifically X, Y or X.'

as a last resort

'You are f*cking kidding aren't you? Get some other bugger to manage it then.'

Seriously, if you really subjectively believe he/she is wrong, you can justify your concerns and very importantly have an alternative approach you should mention it.

Littlefish · 13/10/2005 22:15

I try and put my case forward as diplomatically as possible. If that doesn't work, then I get quite blunt! Luckily I have a boss who values my opinion and is prepared to admit that sometimes my ideas are better than his (only sometimes though!)

I agree with Custy about the "playing devil's advocate" thing.

Original poster
busybusybee · 13/10/2005 22:19

Thanks for all your replies!
My personal favourite is courtesy of Gomez - Which I of course will not actually say - but gee I would love to soooooooooo much!

'You are f*cking kidding aren't you? Get some other bugger to manage it then.'

It's so perfectly appropriate for the situation I am in!

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BudaBabe · 13/10/2005 22:21

Have been known to throw a file across office at boss, say "sort it yourself!" and walk out.

Luckily we were "close" so I was forgiven!

colditz · 13/10/2005 22:23

What's the situation then BBB?

Gomez · 13/10/2005 22:23

Ahh, go on busybusybee you know you want to.

BTW I nearly called you busybustybee if you fancy a name change . Or some of my pinotage.

munz · 13/10/2005 22:25

depends what mood he's in - with my boss u have to pick ur moments/ if u don't he's a nightmare.

either that or when he's in a good mood u have to 'plant' the idea into his head and nurture it.

JoolsToo · 13/10/2005 22:27

I'd say - well yes, that's a point of view - what do you think of this concept .....

plant an alternative subtley - make him think it came from his own thoughts.

Original poster
busybusybee · 13/10/2005 22:31

Thankyou Gomez! The busty bit is fairly appropriate actually but i wouldnt admit it anyway except on MN

Thankyou for asking Colditz - The situation is (its long and complicated so i will try to be brief!)
Dh and I moved 'here' 6 months ago. We live and work in a community for adults with learning difficulties. We have committed ourselves to being here for 3-5+ years. A lot of the time life here is great fun. It can be very rewarding, enormously funny, lots of wonderful memories etc.

It can also be a PITA!!!!!!!

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colditz · 13/10/2005 22:34

I think you have the right to make your feelings known loud and clear then. Do you have a whistle blowing policy? If his plans endanger the residents of the community you can go over his head, tell SS what he's doing, and I think they are no allowed to sack you for it

Original poster
busybusybee · 13/10/2005 22:35

Joolstoo and Munz - Yes DH is wonderful at that!!!!!!!!!!!!
When Bossman (seems an appropriate nickname for now!) talks to DH and I together he is normally very thoughtful and clever and likeable .......... but often he and his DW corner me with some of their latest "thoughts" and i am just sooooooooo bad at replying without dissolving into a heap of nervous useless replies!!!!!!!!!!

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Original poster
busybusybee · 13/10/2005 22:38

Well now you mention it! there is a whistle blowing policy - But Bossman is very keen on legislation etc - he is desparate that care standards are as high as possible - ITs certainly not a care issue im getting at here

Its more to do with "his latest scheme" as it were - which often changes and morphs week to week - He always thinks he is right which i find such a pain!

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Original poster
busybusybee · 13/10/2005 22:43

Should also add that i also have enormous respect for our boss in many ways - he is far cleverer (sp?) than i am - which is why he wins discussions i guess

He dont dislike him - I just get frustrated the fact that his ideas are always better (in his opinion!)

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