Do you go to a mum and baby / toddler group? What is it like? Does anyone not go to one?

[mumfor1sttime]

Hi, didnt know where to post this! I am asking this because I take my 9 month ds to a group on a Thursday,but it can be difficult as I work mornings and it is always a rush for us to get there.
There are 2 groups, one which starts at 10.30,which is for age 5-12months, the other starts at 11.30am for age 0-5 months.
At the moment we are still going to 0-5 month class, this is mainly because of my work hours and also because other class is really full.
The HV said it was ok to stay in other group as the other one was full, but I feel like I want to move ds up to other group.
I just find it hard with my work hours (I work 6am to 9.15am) to find a suitable class!
I want to take ds as I think its good for him, wondered what others thought?

Sorry just had to waffle about it....!

I have been going to parent and toddler groups since dd1 was born six years ago. I still go with dd2 (3) but she will be going to school next year so it will be quite strange. I used to go to groups almost every day of the week. I found I needed to get out - couldn't bear to be stuck in the house on my own looking at all the jobs to be done.
Groups near us are a mixture of mornings and evenings to we've been quite lucky there.
I try to help out as much as I can by setting up the room and clearing up, even make the refreshments sometimes.
I may even pop in occasionally next year to lend a hand - well it keeps me out of mischief!!

Thanks! Am still pondering though, maybe I will go to 0-5 month class! It is peeing down with rain as well!

Sweetkitty - don't be put off. I'm sure everyone will be fine. I used to think that everyone knew everyone else but in fact they were in exactly the same situation as me, guess they just knew how to start a conversation better than I did. Give it a go for your little one if not yourself - it's good for them to mix with other children before they start pre-school/nursery.

mumfor1sttime, pity you couldnt go with sparkler, she'd keep you right!

you could always go, maybe you will love it! and if you dont, then you can always just leave

BE BOLD

I live in Poole so if anyone is near me you are more than welcome to join me.

Think I will go today, little man is asleep at the mo. Not going to make the half 10 class, think I will do the half 11.

I hate mother and toddler groups, its just not me. I did them to death in London with ds1 as I didn't know that many people and needed adult conversation but I haven't done them at all now I'm back up North with ds2 and I feel liberated! I took ds2 to tumbletots the other day and I couldn't even handle that! Its all the polite smiles and small talk, just not for me. Plus, my children never seem to behave themselves when I want them to and I end up getting frustrated. Bikes in park work and cakes in starbucks with friends work better for us!

I feel happy that not every one goes to these groups.

Springchicken - if you contact your local council they normally do a list of children playgroups/M&T's/organised activities etc.

There's no need to go to something you don;t want to...Hey have a look at www.netmums.com - if they cover your local area then they will list EVERYTHING you can do with your kids. And if you know about something going on that's not listed you can tell them and they will add it.

On netmums, I just found a group to try today in the afternoon, that we can walk to, since dd2's Montessori is shut for a Jewish holiday-and it is pouring with rain which rules out my thought of another (expensive) kiddy farm visit. I will go expecting little and knowing that I have to make an effort-but in our case dd2 NEEDs some stimulation, she is already bored here at home and will enjoy a change of scene of any kind. It might even be fun. I've been to loads of these things and no one has ever tried to convert me to their religion, as is happens.

IME 3/5 m&t group sessions are not great fun for shy mums, but I have met the occasional person I could chat with, or another day recognise and say hi to in the park, which makes us feel slightly less isolated, OR I laid up some fond memories of doing something DIFFERENT with my dds (some new craft, or toy we didn't have at home), on an otherwise unpromising day-now one is at school I realise how short the time is before you CAN'T.

The more expensive organised activities (gymboree) I have found have been full of high-achieving parents who rush in, and out to their next appointment, and dd1 actually didn't enjoy them. But that's just us, and maybe that particular place and time.

Major stress - will try that website. Thanks.

Am now going to sign off and get ready for group!

i agree that alot of m&t groups are cliquey and filled with stone faced moody women sitting the corner scoffing buscuits and bitching with their backso to their little brats who are beating up all the kids...

i went to quite a few where no-one even the organiser made eye contact with me - sad cows!

but i just kept checking others out until i found a few my dd and i really liked. you can ask your council or hv for a list, there are so many.

but going until you find one, you could just pop your head around the door to get a vibe.

just remember there are lots of lovely friendly mums out there so keep looking

I've made more friends in the park! I just used to go to sell my Avon.

The thought terrifies me. If I knew I wasn't going back to work I'd probably make an effort to do something but, atm, am enjoying this period of doing nothing.

i go to a small mother and toddler group at our local nursery, as it is so small it isnt cliquey and really nice to go and offload yourself!

i did also try another group near us, ran independantly in a hall that was cliquey noone spoke to me, one person spoke to dd but when i tried to make conversation they turned away. lovely, given up now go to my one and thats all, might try a few more when i start childminding as dd will be a bit bigger as well!

Hi all just got back from group, havent been for 2 weeks and was full of new faces and tiny weeny babies!
My ds was oldest one there and looked huge!
Will def try to lokk for another group, as felt really out of place.

smaller groups are sometimes better as people just have to talk to you! good luck!

is it just me that will take their little peeps to something every day then??

I didn't used to its just sort of grown!! started at a fri morn one when ds1 was about 1 when ds2 was born 6 months ago i jpoined a tuesday afternoon one and sort of hijacked an nct group on a mionday afternoon, ds1 starts playschool next week wed and thurs so will take ds1 to the group next to the playschool room.

tbh at first i found the fri one very cliquey and i am very quiet so found it hard to make friends, now tho i get on really well with lots of the mums and see them at the other groups too. there are some who just go to let their kids run riot which i disagree with but for the most part the kids are looked after.

Whoever suggested netmums is right, they have alocal page with a list of griups in your area on it, u could also look up your local church(s) on the internet and see if they havea group

or not go. i go because i enjoy watching my children play(well ds1 anyhow) and they can play with different toys. i also enjoy seeing the other mums and i have friends now which i didn't have a year or so ago.

i take dd to things 3 days a week and the other 2 days we visit friends, it stops her from being whingy at home and she gets to see kids, she loves it!!!

I have just been on netmums site, it is very useful, and have found a group which is in the afternoon which would suit me better. Just need to find out what age the children can be to go.