DT1 becoming obsesively jealous of siblings.

[waterfalls]

She is almost 22 months and she throws huge huge tamtrums when her twin sister or 4 yr old brother come near me, I have tried leaving her to it, but she is very stubbon and just wont give in.

We knew from an early age she was going to be the drama queen but she is getting worse very quickly.

Her twin sister is so well behaved and very placid, so I give her attention when DT1 starts her tantrums to try and teach her that being well behaved will get her the attention she wants, but she seems totally oblivious to this, once she finishes her tantrum she gets a fuss and cuddle, but she does'nt seem to be learning by it, no sign of the tantrums getting shorter or less frequent.

Any advice.

No advice, but I think that you are doing the right thing. Do you manage to distract her at all?

I think it's hard at this age to remember and recognise things. My DT1 is also rather jealous and possessive. They are just about to be 20 months.

I tend to ignore it where I can, and offer other things. Am glad when only 1 of them is doing the possessive thing though. Cos on those occasions when it's the 2 of them....... oh dear Lord!!!!!!!!!!

DT1 also believes that EVERY buggy belongs to her lmao! Not such fun for anyone else though.

well speaking as a twin.. when we were little my sister (dt2) was always "the baby" and was cheerful and generally if she behaved like a baby she was treated like one - this carried on until adulthood. I was the more independent one partly because I couldnt quite understand her motives and partly because she did get all the attention. I was always expected to be sensible and independent. However I still couldnt be the baby that my sister was. I guess what im trying to say is maybe dt2 is the more amenable one and dt1 is finding it harder to show her "nice" side so shows her tantrums

I try to distract her before the tantrum starts but never succeed, I wont distract her while she is tantruming, because I see that as giving in to her.

I dont see any of them as the baby to be honest, they are identical, and both equal in their development, they do everything together, sleep. eat, bath etc, they are very close and dt1 does'nt take her tantrums out on her sister.

I suppose the only thing you/we can do is watch them and continue with what we are doing.

I think we notice the differences more cos they are twins. If they were simply siblings a year apart the differences might not be so apparent.

Ah heck.... here's hoping they continue to love each other

Yes you are right, it is too easy to compare them to each other.

The joys of motherhood eh!!

DT1 chatters on for the UK. DT2 can just about say all gone. She's a grumpy moo, he's a total smiling charmer.

She's a risk taker, he's a follower.

She bites your face then gives you a smack and says sorry.

He runs up and cuddles and kisses you.

The list of differences goes on and on and on.

And yet, he crawled and walked first, and got teeth first. She climbed on the table, out of the highchair, out of the cot drew on the walls etc.

I do love them.... but they make me laugh (when I'm not offering them up for adoption) lol

Yes mine are also very very different, I prefer it that way as well, makes them more individual, I would'nt change them for the world

we just lucky I guess!

Sorry, misquote from George of the Jungle. The kids use it all the time!

Oh blimey, I have had about 10 tantrums today, the little madam, she has such a short fuse, what am I going to do with her????