painful question - need your views

[difficultquestion]

I would appreciate your views on something. (I'm a semi-regular poster, but changed my name for this). We have finally chosen, after a lot of discussion, a name for our new baby girl - Tamsin. This morning I googled for the meaning behind the name and it turns out that it means "twin". The thing is that this baby was one of twins, and I miscarried the other twin earlier in the pregnancy. I didn't choose the name for this reason. My question is - is it too maudlin to have this name? should we start the discussions again?

thanks in advance

I think its a lovely sentiment and one that I'm sure she will feel a special attachment to when she is older. My DH's cousin (female) was given as a middle name her uncle's first name as she died of luekemia a few days befor eshe was born. Odd as it sounds for a girl to have a male name she tells everyone with great pride how she came to be called that, feeling it gives her a special link to someone she never had the chance to know.

My DS was early and we did not have a name for him but the night after he was born the name Jacob kept going over and over in my head. I knew it was his name and wrote it on his cot and called my DH in the morning to tell him. 3 weeks later when we got home from hospital I looked the name up and it means 'he who supplants (replaces)', as I lost my first baby this was increibly poignant. It took me a while to get my head round it but I now feel the name chose Jacob.

I think Tamsin is lovely and the meaning is apt and a sweet tribute

I think is is lovely that you arrived at this name and THEN found out it means twin... I lost my DD's twin at 12 weeks and I wish somehow I could have done something like this to keep the memory of her twin alive... this is just so resonant I think it totally appropriate without being maudlin in anyway...

I want to tell my DD about her twin when she older ... we have planted a magnolia in his memory but I worry if we move, it won't survive... but the name will always last... I think it is so lovely it has brought tears to my eyes... sorry but just feeling sad for our lost twins..

Whether it's fate, or serendipity or sheer chance but whatever it is I think it was meant to be and extra special - as well as being a lovely name. Congratulations on the safe arrival of your dd - and so sorry you had so much sadness along the way.

I agree with so many others. a beautiful way of keeping the memory of your dd's twin alive

thanks so much to everyone who posted and for all your kind messages. The kindness and support I get from the people on here is just amazing.

I think I was just freaked out by seeing the word "twin" on the first page when I searched for meanings, but the more I think about it, maybe it is serendipity or whatever. or maybe just coincidence, but a good one all the same. I don't want this baby to be all about the "other" baby iyswim, but I think I have the perspective now to see that isn't the case.

Mancmum - I am really very very sorry for your loss. god it's all so hard sometimes isn't it?

thanks again xx