Huge argument with Nana!

[bubblebev]

I have just had a huge arguement with my mother after she gave my 2 year old sweets when I asked her not to. It was at 8 o'clock and my son should have been in bed 7.30 but I agreed to keep him up so that she could see him before he went to bed. She comes into the house with a box of sweets and I told her not to give him any as he was away to bed and had already had a treat earlier on but she continued to open the box and give him chocolate. I wasn't happy but bit my tongue and asked her not to give him anymore. The phone rang and I went to answer it and when I came back here is my child with a mouthful of chocolate again! Its not just the case of lots of sugery sweets before bed, she is also undermining my authority in front of my son! Im being the bad one saying no after my mother has been waving a nice big box of choccies before him and she is giving them to him anyway! Am I being unreasonable? Whenever he goes to his nana's he is spoilt and so when he comes home he expects everything his own way and has massive temper tantrums when I say no! What should I do?

I hope she at least did her indulgent granny act without your 2 year-old knowing directly that you'd said he wasn't to have them. Was it a clear "no sweets" or just a "rather you didn't"? If she did directly countermand your instruction in front of your son, I'd be really pissed at that.

Without getting really upset with her, I'd try and make it clear that there's a time and place for her to play the font-of-sweets and late at night, just before bed presumably after he's brushed his teeth is absolutely not the time for it. Bad habit and no favours to the child. General daytime spoiling when they are looking after them though, I think you just have to accept that as par for the course from grandparents.

She did it right in front of him! It's not the first time either, I am always being made to feel guilty about not giving him exactly what he wants but surely he has to learn boundaries and to know that when mummy says no she means it!

I understand that he will always be spoiled by his nana but where do you draw the line?