Not sure what to do - work??

[Boe]

I am having a bit of trouble with a lady at work - she is not mean to me or anything she is just completely imcompetant - my boss is in India at the mo and she is in Singapore - he has phoned her and ased her to do some stuff and she has phoned me and said Boss needs meetings booked with blah blah, I said no blah blah works in NL and not BK - oh yes she said - and started saying how she does not know these people anyway - well neither do I but all she had to do was write down their names and get them right.

She then told me to ring boss and ask their names and I said no - he will only ask me why she did not tell me and I do not want to make her look like even more of an incompetant fool than she is. She took umbridge at this and said she will have to stay late in the office to talk to someone else and find out what their names are (sorry if confusing) the thing is she is always doing this and blaming her mess ups on me - she has told me wrong days when people are coming over and they have not had any accommodation and I did check by email - which she ignored - when she was tackled on it she just said oh it was Boe not me (ggrr!!) she also tells me flights have to be changed so Boss can connect to places in the far east and we always end up changing flights back to the ones I originally had - just wasting my time.

I think worst of all though is she does not like one of her bosses - he is second in command to my boss and I think a lovely if not demanding man - they hate each other but she constantly phones and tells me how he is evil (she is religeous) and he is a bastard and all sorts of horrid stuff. I feel like I should say something to my boss but her husband is ill and cannot work so she is main breadwinner and I know losing this job would devastate her.

Would you tell or just put up with it?

(sorry if this is comfusing by the way.)

If you said something to your boss surely she wouldn't get the sack straight away?? wouldn't your boss be able to deal with it and give her time and support to improve?? and if she is rubbish at her job surely your boss should know because your company would be wasting money paying someone who is crap at their job (and not giving you a payrise). and why are you protecting her when she doesn't have any qualms about bad mouthing you??

I know some people might find this harsh, but I think for your peace of mind and self belief (and self protection come to that) you need to speak up. You're just being too nice IMO - and from posts elsewhere you sound like a really really nice person - and you need to think about yourself more.

HTH and hope this doesn't sound to stroppy or anything. Have been in a similar-ish situation and am now so glad I did something about it.

Boe if someone else had written this what advice would you give? My bet is you would say "Don't put up with it". It is a shame about her domestice situation but that is not your problem and it certainly doesn't give her the right to treat you this way. Have you tried talking to her on a one-to -one basis and explaining how she makes you feel. Maybe you could ask HR to sit in to make it more formal ? If she doesn't improve after this I would speak to your boss. At least get your side across. I don't think anyone should have to put up with this sh*t at work. You are both there to do a job, you are both adults and she should treat you like one and not childishly try and undermine you.
I know that feeling of not wanting to go into work because you are not getting on with someone and it is horrible (a long ago experience). You need to get this sorted for your own piece of mind.

wedgiesmum, we crossed - but great minds etc...

Thanks guys and thanks Wedgiesmum - you are lovely.

Thing is this woman is on borrowed time and has been told to focus more so there is huge risk that she could be sacked straight away - and I would feel so bad.

Man she is bad mouothing is really close to boss - they have known each other for 20 years and are good friends.

Problem is she is in Singapore and I in London so is hard to sit down with her - I have told her that I have no problems with the man in question and quite like him but it does not seem to matter to her what I think.

I have decided to tell boss when he returns though - he will be really cross that I have kept this from him but better me telling him now than him finding out later.

Thanks for all your advice.

Just got to wait till he gets back and work up the courage!!

You're doing the right thing. Bet you feel better already !

Best of luck with it, and as Kayleigh says bet you feel better about it already because you've got a plan of how you're going to go forward and not just feelings of unease/dissatisfaction.