Moving to France - Would you Do It?

[StressyHead]

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Hi Stressyhead,

I'd go for France every time! I wish we could carry out a similar move but we are so caught up in the rat race it seems impossible to get out. You could do the test of making a list of (honest) pros and cons and analyse them. Best of luck with whatever you choose.

PS Will you have to change your nickname when you are no longer stressed?

It's sounds a like a fantastic opportunity to me! Do you get on enough with your in-laws for there to be no problem in going into business with them?

As for holidays, meals etc. Well, you're in France, you'll be permanently on holiday with access to great food. Could you give it a try for 5 years or so? Nothing ever has to be permanent.

Good luck

StressyHead - my inlaws moved to France about 15 years ago to start up a business renovating, selling, renting properties in the Dordogne. They are doing well now but it has been tough. I have spent quite alot of time out there with them and thought about joining them but I do not think I could adapt well to this lifestyle - I would miss friends, family and as you say the "nice things in life". I would get a bit bored! But that's just me! My inlaws made sure that they learnt the language quickly and now have many friends - most of these are local French people. The other issue would be that once you move it would be difficult to move back to the UK again. Don't want to sound negative but so many people have this romantic idea about living in France and it is not always that easy.

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There is a programme tonight Channel 4 about a couple and child who moved to Italy. Probably something you should watch. Think its about 8pm.

By the way I would jump at the chance if I could get my husband to move!!! Good luck whatever you decide.

We moved, be it only on a temporary basis, 2 years ago to Switzerland. I would say go for it - what have you really got to lose, especially while the kids are young ?

A couple of considerations to make are whether the income would really be sufficient to maintain you all. How adapatable is your 10 yr old, would he be able to hack being an outsider, losing touch with friends and the stresses of learning another language whilst trying to keep up with his peers academically. How good is your and the family's French, would it be possible to learn it as a foreigner in the area where you plan to live or would you have time to do so before you go.

For us the pace of life, as you say without the stress of commuting, enables us to spend more time together as a family which is especially nice for dh while our kids are so young (5 and almost 2). We are also more motivated to get out and about and see different places than we ever were in UK - it does n't need to cost a lot to do so.

hth

Posts overlapped but as to your concerns regarding dd's language development, don't worry. Our dd was born here but with English the language spoken at home it is not a problem. She does n't yet attend local playgroups but friends whose children do find that their kids have no problems making the distinction. The exception would be if there were fundamental speech development issues in which case you could get some confusion which accentuates the underlying problem.

I wouldn't worry at all about your daughter being exposed to another language - it's great opportunity for her. In fact, I think that would be one of the most positive reasons to go. But, I would worry about how well you get on with your in-laws when you'll become more dependent upon each other for company.

Sterssyhead, we could all come and stay at your gites!

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A friend of mine has recently moved to France with her dh and two very young children. They were housesitting but are now renting. She absolutley loves it and enjoys the weather, the freedom etc. BUT she said it was really important to tap into the expat network so she had English-speaking friends, so go somewhere busier where there are already a few English people living there. Also, learn the language if you don't speak it already. Also, I don't know what you do for a living but could you do not use some part of your skills to do some teleworking -maybe consultancy or something just for extra income while you are setting up? I think you need a really watertight business plan and also make plans for what happened if say, you or your inlaws wanted to go back to England (maybe you'd be homesick or they got ill) - what would happen to your joint business then? Better sort all those things out sooner rather than later IMO.
It is a big jump. How about taking a month off to stay with your inlaws in abig villa just to test the water. If you can't bear them then, it might not be a good idea to live and work together!
BTW babies are fantastic at learning languages - any languages. She will grow up speaking perfect, accentless French and English if you stay for a few years, and that's a fabulous advantage, not a disadvantage. Also I hear French state schools are very good. What does your 10year old think of the idea?

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have you found the forum on the living france site-really useful stuff.
General consensus seems to be that you cant rely on gite income alone generally, mainly too many gites and tourism down 20% this year. But if you had no mortgage might be ok.
Re your 10yr old, most people seem to think this is just about the cut off point for learning a new language properly. Schools seem to be good unless you have any problems such as dyslexia in which case there seems to be little provision.
I only know all this as we were going to do the same thing last year, move and take our parents with us. Didnt partly because dream house fell through and partly because i Chickened out for sake of the children (9,6,4). There are very few international schools outside Paris, my eldest is very academic and not sporty at all and i thought he would suffer, but thats just me being a ninny probably! best of luck

Article in Eve this month about couple houseitting in France so they still have a home to come back to. We have often thought about it and still may one day. It'd be awful to get into your dotage and wonder what might have happened if...
Go with your instinct.

Or housesitting in France even!

Sounds like a good idea overall to me.

But you need to really start thinking about your 10 year old and the language. Most 10 year olds will not just pick up the language like younger children will and may feel frustrated and isolated while they are learning. Obviously while they are learning (and it will take at least 6 months, probably a year or more) they will also be missing out on normal school subjects.

Get him some intensive French lessons now, just in case. Won't do any harm anyway, will it?

Take me! Pleeeeeeeease take me!