Not In My Back Yard Attitudes

[Lindy]

I would be interested in hearing Mumsnetter's opinions on this subject.

I am lucky enough to live in a very beautiful, rural area, good schools etc, where most people enjoy a very comfortable & affluent life style.

There is currently a proposal to develop an rehabilitation centre for alcoholics (possibly drug users as well) on the outskirts of the village. I am absolutely shocked at the attitude of the majority of the village - people seem to be totally 'outraged' at the idea, there are all sorts of rumours going round, lots of people are worried about 'drug types' wondering around the village - influencing our children and robbing our homes; people are worried about loss of value to property prices (they have gone up by about 40% in 2 years - so what if you might lose a couple of thousand!). A huge meeting is planned this week with leaks being given to the press etc.

Am I being naive - my view is that these sorts of services are essential, any of us, or our children, might need them at some time in the future, and how much better to come to a quiet, rural area where perhaps the 'temptations' are less than in a town?

I am shocked at so called 'friends' reactions, some people are ignoring me because I have dared to speak out in favour of the plan!

What do other people think, is this just a downside to living in the country with narrow minded individuals?

Hmmm, dunno. I'm always shocked by the attitude to asylum seekers, very sad pcture of the country we live in

I dont think anyone, if they were honest, would want one next door to them but they have to be rehabilitated somewhere dont they. I really wouldnt like a YOI near to me but on talking to one of my friends the other day there is one about 200yds down the road. It always has been there apparently and I can honestly say it doesnt make any difference to us, well it couldnt do if we didnt know it existed!

Actually I dont know how I would feel about it. I can see both sides of the argument.

I can't say I'm surprised by people's attitudes but good on you Lindy for speaking out in favour. I mean, really, I would have thought most people in a rehabilitation centre for alcholics would be there under doctor's orders and/or their own volition. So what risk is there anyway? If they are there as part of their prison sentence, a condition for parole, I would imagine they are not deemed to be a risk to any local community. Good for you Lindy.

We have a similar situation in a nearby village. A proposal for a half-way house for 4 children with emotional problems had had locals up in arms. I despair of these narrowminded attitudes, but they are rife in the countryside.
What is more depressing, as Anais points out, is the general attitude towards asylum seekers.

I think the attitude to asylum seekers comes because a few bad cases get publicised and then everyone thinks all asylum seekers are bad. From what I've read in the papers, it sounds like they're all money grabbing losers, but I know that's just one or two and there's many others who just come to get away from a bad situation and are prepared to work hard etc to stay.

It's always the case that a few bad people let everyone else down.

I think you get narrow minded/badly informed people everywhere, Lindy, if it's any comfort. I meet quite a nimbys in London too. I think you're really brave to speak up in favour of the plan, especially if it means that you're having to disagree strongly with your friends. That's always hard to do, IME. Respect!

quite a nimbys? Forgot the few there, sorry.

those places are essential,i wouldnt mind having one in my street,my uncle was an alcoholic and his son a heroin addict,the family went through hell specially my aunt who was being beaten by her husband and had absolutely everything in the house stolen by her own son,they both went to a rehabilatation centre and both are doing fine now,it can happen to anyone and without them places they havent got a hope in the world

Agree that their attitude stinks.
I grew up in a idyllic village, which just happened to have a borstal on the outskirts. It was actually great for the village - lots of jobs, cheap housing on the estate they had originally built to house all the guards, and great facilities for the kids of the guards. The "borstal boys" used to be allowed to come down to the village near the end of their sentence to do community work - weeding old peoples gardens, building treehouses in the playing fields. They would also come with the guards to give talks to us in school. Regardless of the fact these places are absolutely necessary and have to go somewhere, I think people often miss the fact that there can be benefits for the local community rather than problems.

Good for you, Lindy.

Totally agree with you Lindy. We have a rehab half-way house next door to us and have to say have never had a minute's trouble from them. They are seriously into reciprocal respect for the neighbours and our whole street is pretty much supportive. We know the guys by name, and some of them have been very sweet to my 3yo DD, who just refers to them as "the boys next door". In fact, as there's almost always someone home there we actually feel that our house is safer for having them next door. I think we have a sense of community in knowing and supporting them, and in London you don't get that community feel very often. Well done for supporting the plan. Your so-called "friends" may feel differently if a member of their family needs this kind of support one day.

Good on you Lindy.
We have a rehab centre just down the road from us. There are a few heroin addicts where I live. Dh best friend incidentally is a heroin adddict, he became one when his wife left him and took his 4 children with her. Dh refused to speak to him because he went onto the heroin (they seen so many people die when growing up through heroin usage) dh felt that his best friend was letting him down. I explained to Dh that maybe his BF felt he had no choice as he had lost everything important in his life and his BF did not need to lose him aswell. Dh started thinking differently then and accepted him for what he was. He has now become my BF too. He has never robbed off us or treated us with any disrespect.He treats our children as his own.He was a witness at our wedding.He has been there for us, like we have been there for him.He has never asked us for money to "score" and we have seen him on a few occasions going cold turkey. It is not nice and sometimes I have felt like giving him some money to "score" but it will not solve anything, only encourage the problem he has.
IMO people dont choose to become heroin addicts or alcholics, it is through circumstances they became addicted. They should be supported and rehab centres are the turning point in addicts lives.They should be encouraged instead of condemned.

My parents hosue in near a drugs rehab centre (quite famous one) and we never had any problems.

It's attitides. A friend is trying to get planning permission to build a hosue on derelict land. They want to include a sensory room for their autistic son - I won't repeat the full horrible story but basically the council received a lot of letters- inlcuding some that didn't want autistic children in their street.

Unfortunately it's not just in the countryside. There's HUGE local opposition where I live to turning an old Navy base into a centre for 400 asylum seekers. The attitudes are really revolting - "I don't want 400 men wandering around my town; Of course we're not racist!!!!" The town has allowed a seafront hotel, cafe and houses to be demolished and given planning permission for flats. The people who are against the asylum centre say that the town can't support 400 new people re doctors, dentists etc.What about the 400-odd people who will be moving into the new seafront flats??? Not a murmur about them - now there's a surprise!!

Don't know what to say Jimjams - those people must be very pathetic! If only they spent their time researching things before spouting ignorant and hurtful nonsense to people.

Lindy - I echo what others have said - it must have been difficult to speak out against your friends views, so well done!

Lindy, it's the same where we are. We used to work at a "social rehabilitation" project on the outskirts of the village where we now live. Some residents opposed it and we had to attend a meeting in the village about it. It was horrid. You would have thought we were opening a home for axe murderers and rapists!

But saying that, most people in the village thought it was great, it was just a vocal minority which stirred up opposition.

When I was a child my parents were residential social workers. We lived at a children's home in a village and any trouble was blamed on the kids.

As you say, some day it might be our children in need of help.

Thanks for all the encouraging words, the 'big' meeting is tomorrow so I'll let you know what happens (although I'm chickening out a bit by sending DH to the meeting - his views are the same of mind and he's much better at public speaking!)

Had a major row with my mother about asylum seekers recently She is such a nimby it's unbelievable, but isn't even prepared to listen to another view - it got me really upset and wound up.

Good luck, Lindy. Hope the meeting goes well.