DD wants me to 'play' more with her at home. Do you play regularly with your dc?

[Earlybird]

DD complained last night that I don't do enough with her at home - she wants me to 'play' more with her.

Realistically - how much do you 'play' with your dc at home?

Fwiw, I do alot with/for her - we went to a museum yesterday, for instance, and I took her to a park nature club meeting last weekend. We have just come back from a short hike around a small lake, where we did a bit of birdwatching. I host a lot of playdates - at least one a week, and probably 3 a week over the summer holidays.

But dd is right - I don't often sit on the floor/at the table and play board games, do a jigsaw or generally 'play' with her at home. I don't go on the wii with her, or sit and watch movies.

I've always enjoyed doing things out of the house with her far more than sitting in the house. I work from home, so can far too easily get caught up in something that needs doing for work, household chores, watching a bit of telly, or mumsnetting. .

Do you 'play' at home regularly with your dc? How often (generally), and what do you do?

Oh - she is 9.7, btw. She is an only child, and I am a lone parent.

doesn't she have any local friends?

i think its a bit weird tbh, my kids were out playing

There are kids her age in the neighbourhood, but all are highly scheduled (ballet, football, drama, swimming, etc) so generally not available for spontaneous play.

Also, almost all the children 'round here are at different schools - think there are 6 different schools represented in our immediate area, so kids are on different schedules.

Makes it tricky, so we usually 'import' an arranged playdate pal from dd's school.

isn't it about spending some time with her instead of getting on with everything else that needs doing around the house? Actually engaging with her without being distracted by life etc?

I rarely play with mine. They have friends who do that for me. I bake and do craft things with them once or twice a week and we go to the park etc. But I don't sit and play 'dollies' or whatever with them.

god no
ds and dd play with mates
they are in the garden now
I have banned from house

why don't you instigate the neighbourhood kids to play at yours?

It might be because she's an only child that she wants you to play with her? At that age I used to play with my brother (we are 18 months apart). Maybe you can set aside a bit of time once a week for an hour for you to play with her?

ggirl - to be honest, we rarely see them - though there is one girl in particular that dd likes. Maybe I should tell her parents to ring us whenever they are at home with free time......or even make a specific plan to get the girls together.

i expect they're feeling the same and would jump at the chance

You may be right, though there are 3 children in the family so think they are more able to play together and entertain each other when they're home. But maybe that means one (well behaved) extra is no big deal?

I know how you feel
my dc are 11 yrs apart so essentially only children when it comes to playing
ds was bored at home until this summer when he met up with boys around the corner
now they are inseperable
I would def push for more contact with the girl in the neighbourhood if I was you.

So - it seems that most are saying I need to find ways for dd to be more engaged/occupied at home/in the neighbourhood, without giving myself a hard time, or embarking on some sort of 'playing at home with my child' mission?

I readily admit, I am far too inclined to feel parental guilt with very little prompting!

yes don't feel guilty that the idea of playing with her regularly fill you with dread

Oh I am rubbish at playing! Don't mind baking, or going swimming, or to the park, but the thought of another games of snakes and ladders etc makes my teeth itch. I also have an only, and encourage activities like dancing at the weekend, and playdates. I am lucky that we have a few girls of similar ages in the street - they are all at different schools - but go round each others to play and ride their bikes/scooters out front when it's dry.

ggirl - lol, you may have a point!

Maybe it is especially acute for only children (and moreso for lone parents of onlies) because we are the sole 'target' for playtime and the sole source of 'human' amusement and interaction.

Fwiw, dd is happily playing on her own atm (and I am 'off the hook') as we spent a lovely 3 hours outside playing/hiking/chatting this afternoon.

I am much better (and happier) with that sort of interaction.

As I actively like playing board games DH and I do play them with our DC fairly frequently, particularly in winter on say Sunday afternoons or after tea when it is too dark to play out.

Do not play roleplay type games with them, do sometimes sit and watch tv or a film together, for example DR Who, or X Factor, as family activity.