Disorganised Chaos!

[Jodee]

Help! I am starting to sink under the mess and muddle that I call my house. It's not that my house is dirty (not by my standards anyway) - I am managing to keep on top of the housework, (apart from dusting)in fact I probably spend too much time cleaning and hoovering, when my son is asleep - I think it's important to spend quality time with him when he is awake, not cleaning the house. I don't want to get into a debate about how much help we get from our partners with the housework (my husband does all his own ironing, so he is a complete saint in my eyes).
To get to the point - I can't get to grips with the other stuff, particularly paperwork. I'm one of those 'just in case' people - for example, some rubbishy circular will come through the letterbox and I will put it to one side, just in case. The same goes for bank statements, till receipts, those mini statements you get from the hole-in-the-wall... the list goes on. My bedside cabinet is piled high with stuff, mainly because the drawers are already stuffed full! My husband is getting irritated with me now as my stuff is starting to encroach onto his side of the bedroom and he is threatening to get a black sack and chuck every piece of paper lying around into it.
Things started to go from bad to worse when ds was born 16 months ago; I would really like to get on top of this thing before no 2 comes along, which is nearly in the pipeline.
There was another thread about mess and untidiness and someone mentioned a site called LifeCoachingAcademy.com which sounded like it would be helpful, but it is under construction.
Please tell me I am not the only one like this, and any help would be very gratefully received, before I completely turn into my mother, who is 100 times worse (in fact my husband won't even let me take my ds round to her house, she has to come to us!)

Lil, well I confess, during lambing time, well just before it starts I do a lot of cooking, so that meals are ready when I come in. One thing I do is if we're having mince and tatties, I put the tatties in the mince and freeze both together, same with stew. F&M has taken its toll in this area, and we are still in an At Risk Area, which means that if we sell livestock, we have to get a licence, stock inspected by the vet, lorry washed and disinfected and then sealed with a metal tag on the tail door and 2 side doors as well. We are managing to get livestock moved, as in we've managed to get 19 fat bullocks away this week, some as far up as Perth.

The dog has been a complete pain in the bum!, she loves the Picachu that makes noise, and is at present, nursing the "pups" behind the couch and making squeeking noises to her babies. Worst thing is she won't work for my husband when she is like this, must be a female thing, she won't even go to her bed if he goes out to put her in her shed. Luckily she doesn't do this during lambing time, one thing she does do is if the kids fall over or cry for any reason, she is the first there to them and nuzzles them under their arm, silly dog but she is very protective over me and them, she wouldn't bite, just not in her nature.

Sorry I've rambled on but I've had bit of a stressful afternoon, spent nearly half an hour getting a ewe out of the bloody midden! Then the vet examining bullocks that are going away tomorrow morning at 5.00am, no gin for me tonight then!

Just checking out Organizedhome.com - so enjoying it. Printing out all sorts of handy checklists - bliss! With regard to Christmas, when my son was born 2 years ago (in October), I had all the Christmas presents bought, wrapped and tagged by September. I'd also ordered all the cards and printed off labels for the envelopes by the time I went on Maternity leave - so about mid-Sept. Martha Stewart, eat your heart out!

Bugsy, your christmas endeavor puts you now above Croppy in our mad housewife survey!!

Haven't got much original to say, but one of the things I feel I can do well is be organised! I have a filing cabinet for household paperwork, open my letters by the bin, and have a "to do" drawer for paperwork etc that needs dealing with. I try to deal with it at least once a week, otherwise it gets too daunting, and gets put off and put off. I use Microsoft Money to organise our finances, which I find really helpful (and I am the sad kind of person that actually enjoys inputting my receipts!), you can do all sorts of reports showing exactly how much you spent on food, clothes, or whatever (quite frightening!)
I live by the maxim "if you haven't used/worn it for a year, then get rid of it". This has been helped by my council recently starting a doorstep recycling collection - they take all sorts and they come every other week. We have nothing in our attic, and hardly anything in our garage. I think this is a reaction to my mother's way of doing things - ie keep everything. but never have anything useful - so I always have spare bulbs, batteries, fuses, etc...
My real secret, though, is that if your house looks tidy, people are fooled into thinking that it's clean. I must admit, I don't clean as often as I probably should (beyond the bare necessities), but most people that come here believe it's clean, because it's tidy and uncluttered. I would love a cleaner, but don't really know where to start finding one - any tips?
My real weakness is cooking - that very rarely gets planned in advance, it's all last minute stuff.
Sorry to ramble on, but this is a subject very close to my heart!

Bugsy, I too loved the website but decided it was rather a white elephant as one could, potentially, waste an awful amount of time on it!

A tip I didn't mention earlier is keeping a space, (we have drawers within a closet), that one can keep a large supply or cards for all occassions, stationary generally, and labels, wrapping paper etc., I also keep a small drawer of general all purpose gifts... the gifts are only token standbys but they are there just in case these are particularly good for childrens parties but I also have a few things that are adult friendly. If I see a card for someone I alwys buy it at the time I first see it and put it in the drawer. I did this two weeks a go for a card for a sibling whose birthday isn't until June! Some might think it's a little OTT but it works for me.

Message withdrawn

Joanne, I had a look at the book 'Clear Your Clutter', alot of it was pretty obvious, but it is the sort of book to get you motivated. And I do believe that cluttered mind - cluttered house, big cycle. I love it when I have big clear outs, especially my bedroom.

But even I thought it got a bit weird when she got on to the chapter of clear your colon!?!

I've decided little and often is the key, last week I did the airing cupboard (towels) and corner cupboard (duvets/pillows/bedding) and threw out so much crap, it is so neat now, I have to keep opening the door!

Just go into a room with a bin bag and look around, hubbie went to the tip last weekend and he'll be going this weekend, not a complaint from him, he loves it when I get into clearout mode.

I'm the same on cards and present front, have a drawer/cupboard for them, you do need to plan far ahead on these, otherwise I forget or end up in a place with no choice of lovely presents.

Ems/Joanne, I went and bought that book too, and you're right about some things being obvious, but sometimes it really helps to see it written in black in white to give you a kick up the bum to do something. Hmmm, haven't got to the bit about clearing out your colon, must read later!

I've also been dipping into the Organizedhome.com site, and although I don't really go for the American style, it had some good ideas.

I like everyone's ideas about cards and gifts; in the past I would see a card for, eg. a 21st birthday and buy it in advance, but when the birthday came around, could I find the blasted thing!! No! Have to then go and buy another one, and guess what, original card turns up. Grrr.

Ems, I've just sat in bed and read through the whole chapter Clutter Clearing your Body - very interesting about the Lungs, Lymphatic System and the Skin, but perhaps there should be a warning not to read the sections on Eating & Excreting, and The Ideal Bowel Movement at mealtimes (because you will be laughing so much you will get indigestion)!!!

Message withdrawn

bloss - where are you moving to? Good luck, & an ideal opportunity to clear your clutter - we got rid of so much stuff (ie clutter that way). I just got the afore mentioned book yesterday & I feel very inspired and excited, although I can see me taking ages to write loads & loads of lists - mmmmmmm. My favourite. I was thrilled with the chapter on meal planning. This has got to be the worst part of my whole life, and it pops up 3 times a day - if she can sort this out for me I'll be sooooooo happy.

here's to success.

Bugsy, isn't that old pregnancy/nesting instinct thing wonderful? With both pregnancies I made to do lists at the start of each week of maternity leave and got something done every day (including grouting the hall tiles on my due date). I've never been so organised or efficient before or since, nor has the house ever been so clean and tidy! I just don't seem to have the will to do it without that extra bit of hormonal help (now there's a thought - forget the contraceptive pill, how about a pill that mimics pregnancy hormones in such a way as to get the nesting instinct going to make us all super-efficient housewives?? And could they make one that would work for men as well?).

Hooray! I filled the boot of my car last night and emptied the whole lot in the charity shop today, I even forced myself to take the pram. I have turned in to the recycling queen of Herts and feel very proud of myself as I drop it all in the relevent bins.

I am now going through photos to put in albums, bit slow with this (last done 2 years ago!). Also going through all the cards and pressies hanging about and sort out what is for who.

Slowly emptying a room downstairs to have a new floor laid so the garage is going to be full again!

Just to revive this thread, there's an interesting programme on BBC2 at 8.30pm called Life Laundry about a storage expert who streamlines people's homes but also sorts out their emotional baggage. Today's programme is about a divorcee who moved 2 years ago into a much smaller house (after the divorce) and there are still unpacked boxes and junk everywhere, but it's more about helping her let go of the past.

Thanks Jodee. I think I will definitley watch thet tonight.
BTW I just love this thread!! Its made me realise Iam not the only one fighting the constant clutter battle.

It was a really good programme but quite how her home had got that bad, I don't know.
I have two recommendations on the clutter problem, one is a book called 'Freedom from clutter' which is brilliant. My mum swears by it and I have borrowed it. The ironic thing was that I borrowed it months ago and only just found it again recently! The other one is www.flylady.net which helps you get into really easy routines and teaches you how to lose clutter in a big way - I am currently filling my 8th charity shop bag and have sent more than that to the tip - and that is since early december. And my house wasn't 1% as bad as Life Laundry Lady.

As my keyboard is dying(have to thump to get spacebar) I'mkeeping this short. Have2rilliant books 'Not for packratsonly' How to cleanup ,clearout and dejunkyourlifeforeverByDon Aslett. Itgoes through all thereasons why we keep stuff from sentimental value, it might be handy one day, it was a baragian , its been in my family for years ,I never had much as a kid etcetc andthen goes onto say YES you can getridofitbecause.... Very readable -my kids didn't get an attention for the 2 days I had my nose stuck in this book.Anditgoesthrough different ways to tackle your clutter.

Now ladies, help !! my biggest problem is our cleaner (from an agency) who isn't too bright (so when I didn't leave the irongin on the table didn't see the BIG basket sitting on my bed), doesn't know how to clean (doesn't look like she scraps the gunk off the floor be for washing it, or lift the toilet seat, or hoover behind the TV, or even clean under the taps etc)I had a word with the agency before christmas, and agreed it was beacuse she was doing another job and it would be better in the NewY ear when she was less tired. Butit isn't that much better even afterleaving long lists(with times to to be spent on each job). I feel really guilty as she is quite nice and is desperate for the job , and it took ages to find any cleaner in our area(soif we say we don't want her, I'm going to have no-one to help at all)

helenmc where do you live? Is there no wee corner shop where you could put up a postcard advertising for a cleaner? I did this once and got several replies. Or a local free paper?

She sounds like a bit of a no hoper on the cleaning front!! Perhaps you should give her one more chance - speak via the agency ( that is what they are there for) and tell them things have NOT improved since the new year and you will have to let her go ( horrid expression)unless she improves bigtime!
Just another thought. If they are an agency, surely they have other cleaners on their books?

We seem to be in a no cleaner area!! . I did try the local newspaper/shop originally. the first lady went on honeymoon and never returned. The second one was absolutely useless and admitted she hated cleaning but it was the only job she could get. After 3 weeks of staring at this dead earwig by the skirting board, DH gave her the sack saying we needed the money to pay for nursery (he's as much a coward as I am). So I thought agency , let them do the sorting and vetting . The agency took 3 weeks to find the first (she left cos she couldn't get to ours anymore), then it was 4 weeks before they found us no 2 (she left when her daughter got a nursery place and she got a full time job), then it was another 3 weeks before we got present lady.

We did have Molly Maid who were fantastic, but the guy who ran it broke his hip and gave it up. The 2 cleaners carried on with us, but by the end they weren't doing that good a job and the final straw was wanting a £5 a week pay rise. Again we chickend out saying we needed the money for nursery.

Every cleaner has less and less on the list to do, in case I'm asking too much.

Blimey , cleaner free zone or what??
Just had another thought which might be faintly riiculous but is worth a try.
Do you have any contact with local secondary schools ( a friend who is a teacher, a parent of a pupil) who might recomend a teenager who might be up for a bit of extra pockey money ? I am thinking of the kind of responsible type of girls( okay, boys too in theory!) who do a bit of baysitting. Or same thing through a church connection? I know I would have been well up for that as a broke teenager. Mind you if you are like me and live in the sticks it needs to be someone who can drive.

I know its very strange, most people who live on our estate have grown up families, and people round here think of 3 miles is too far to travel. And we're not offering peanuts either. I have approached the school regarding babysitting (my kids go to a small school and from 11yrs its girls only, but they do have a sixth form so well old enough for baby sitting)and got no response!!
This does all sound very negative, butI willtakeup yoursuggestion and chat with one of my neighbours who's very into church.

We live in a cleaner-free zone too. I like your idea abvout teenage cleaners, Jasper. I think I'll suggest my teenage DD hires herself out for cleaning jobs, then she can employ a cleaner to muck out her own bedroom.

Do you go to the gym? You could save the cost of the gym and exercise by doing the housework instead and save the cleaners money and then blow all the money you've saved on new gear at the end of month. If you manage to do this, let me know, because I really need to do this. R

LOL, rhiannon!

My doctor reckons that housework and running up and down steep stairs doesn't count as exercise!!! If it doesn't count, how come I'm knackered when I go back to work on a monday?