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My son almost drowned today.

25 replies

brockleybelle · 02/08/2010 21:20

I'm writing this to help me make sense of it and work through it (i'm feeling very upset at the moment) and to warn others. My darling, darling boy almost drowned today.

I met a friend at the local park to feed the ducks. We're new to the area and hadn't been to this part of the park before. As we were walking to the duck pond I noted another pond nearby that wasn't fenced off and was covered in algae so it actually looked like a green 'carpet' and not water. I thought it looked dangerous.

We were standing feeding the ducks when my son, who's 2yrs and 2 months ran off with my friend's 3 year old boy. I chased after my son and when I finally caught up with him I smacked him and told him not to run off as there were ponds, explaining I wanted to see him at all times as he could drown. I know that he didn't quite understand what I meant but I wanted him to see that mummy was serious.

I went back to my friend and we stood chatting. The next thing I knew I could hear a man shouting. I turned and saw he was running towards the pond with the algae, shouting at the top of his voice. My friend's boy was pointing at the pond and I couldn't see my son. Utterly horrified, I realised that he must have fallen in. Where my friend's son was standing were some tall grasses so I ran to the side of them and saw that my son was completely under the water and battling to keep his head out. I jumped in, waded the few metres that he was from me and pulled him out. We were both crying and I held him the tightest I ever have, realising that I'd come within seconds of losing him. It's the most terrifying thing that's ever happened to me.

The man told me that he was walking with his son and his son started pointing to the pond. He looked and saw my son's head in the water. I realise that if the water had been much deeper my precious boy would have gone completely under and would have been undetectable.

I am so, so thankful to God that that man was there at that precise moment to see what was happening and alert me to it. If he hadn't seen, my son would have died. My friend's son knew something wasn't right but being so young he didn't grasp the enormity of it and didn't tell us.

These things take seconds. I was chatting to my friend, laughing and joking, completely oblivious to the awful thing that was happening behind us. It's reminded me, in the most dramatic way, to always be vigilant and careful. Tragedies happen in the blink of an eye.

I have the most awful images in my head, the image of my son thrashing around under the water, drowning. My darling boy. He's had lots and lots of extra kisses and cuddles today.

My lovely friend phoned the council this afternoon and reported what happened. They're going to contact me to discuss making the pond safe. I don't blame them, my son is my responsibility, but that part of the park is, at the moment, treacherous. Toddlers run off, they're curious, and are oblivious to danger. Parents let their guard down and forget to keep constant check on their children. Today could so easily have been a tragedy.

Please, especially during these school holidays, be vigilant about looking after your little ones around water. They are just so precious xx

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gardenpixie · 02/08/2010 21:25

Oh what an awful time for you - I am so so glad your son is OK. I hope you are alright as well and it's great that the council are going to sort out what sounds like a terribly dangerous pond. Hugs to you and your little boy xx

Caz10 · 02/08/2010 21:26

You poor thing

So glad he is ok. It's not just toddlers, that sounds unsafe even for older children, hope you get somewhere with the council, good luck.

QOD · 02/08/2010 21:26

I don't know what to say - thank goodness he's ok

ilovesprouts · 02/08/2010 21:27

omg hope your all ok i had my heart in my mouth wen i began to read this x

usernamechanged345 · 02/08/2010 21:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Northernlurker · 02/08/2010 21:30

Is anyone with you - this was a very shocking experience and you need to keep warm and have somebody take care of you. You did nothing wrong. Children are unpredictable and very quick and water is dangerous however careful you are. I hope the council put up a fence - there's no need at all for the pond to be open like that.

pinkem · 02/08/2010 21:34

I'm glad he is ok. you could talk through with your ds (with pictures or teddies) the events and make sure you highlight the fact that he is fine now. This will probably help you and your son. x

brockleybelle · 02/08/2010 21:39

Thank you all so much for your responses. It's lifted me to have all the lovely messages.
My dh has gone to bed now (very tired after a busy weekend) so I'm up alone with my thoughts. I kept bursting into tears this afternoon, thinking what could have happened, all the 'what ifs?', and also having all the awful mental images of what happened in my head, but it got to a point where dh couldn't really deal with my reaction so I was bottling it all up. I don't mean that to reflect poorly on him - I had lots of hugs and kisses from him, but it got to a stage where he thought I needed to move on, learn lessons from it and stop crying!
My friend and I will chase the council if I don't hear from them.

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brockleybelle · 02/08/2010 21:41

pinkem, I talked with my son earlier. I asked him what happened: "Wet!". I asked him what mummy did: "Mummy catch Max!" I think the most disturbing bit for him was swallowing all that disgusting water, it was foul. We came back stinking. Thankful for hot showers!

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Acanthus · 02/08/2010 21:42

There was another thread on this recently, about how drowning is silent and we don't realise that and expect shouting and thrashing about. You poor thing.

brockleybelle · 02/08/2010 21:45

Ancanthus, the silence of it all is one of the most chilling aspects for me. Something so dreadful and yet the violence of it was noiseless.

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pinkem · 02/08/2010 21:45

You need to go through it though, you could write it down, draw diagrams etc.
I was also wondering if your ds swallowed much water? If you think he did then i would suggest taking him to the drs.

pinkem · 02/08/2010 21:47

Took me ages to write post hench x post!! Asyou have said he did swallow water then i would suggest you should seek medical advice. (I'm a lifeguard)

brockleybelle · 02/08/2010 21:48

pinkem, as we were walking home i was thinking oh dear, he's swallowed lots of putrid water and i hope he doesn't get ill. i'll keep a close eye on him, will check him before i go to bed and see how he is in the morning. he has a sturdy stomach if he doesn't get an upset!

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pinkem · 02/08/2010 21:48

Ha ha the last post makes it sound like i'm trying to sound really important!!

brockleybelle · 02/08/2010 21:49

Thank you, Pinkem. Actually, I'll phone nhs direct now.

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chasingrainbows · 02/08/2010 21:49

nobody has eyes in the back of their head for goodness sake. kiddies can came to grief in puddles. And the unpredictability of little kids is absolutely why you should put pressure on your council to make ponds in parks fenced off.
xxxxxx

brockleybelle · 02/08/2010 21:50

not at all. i'm thankful for the advice

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lal123 · 02/08/2010 21:51

Oh you poor love - and your poor boy! Try not to keep thinking "what if" - (easier said than done I know) - but the fact is that you have your wee boy safe and sound up in his bed and you'll be able to give him more cuddles tomorrow.

pinkem · 02/08/2010 21:57

If you notice his breathing becoming raspy (sp) or if he has been or starts coughing please take him to be checked out. I don't want to scare you i just want you to be aware that 24 hours after a near drowning the water that was inhaled can affect the body.
Hopefully NHS can help. I can't imagine how you feel, i'm sending big hugs your way.

brockleybelle · 02/08/2010 22:03

pinkem, your hugs are greatfully recieved feeling shaky.

just phoned nhs direct and a nurse will phone me back within the hour.

i didn't realise that inhaling lots of water can cause problems. i didn't even think about it. thanks for making me aware. looking forward to hearing back from a nurse so we can discuss it.

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brockleybelle · 02/08/2010 22:04

can i just say, thank you once again to everyone else who has posted with their kind thoughts. it means ever so much to me. today was horrific and i feel lifted reading all the messages xx

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Northernlurker · 02/08/2010 23:20

Hopefully they've rung back with some reassurance? If you're still up I would advise a tot of whisky or brandy if you have any. Good soporific!

pinkem · 03/08/2010 09:13

How is ds this morning? Did you manage to get any sleep? x

brockleybelle · 06/08/2010 21:49

I woke up in the middle of the night on Monday and was having awful flashbacks and images of 'what might have been'. The whole thing has made me so, so thankful that I have my little boy and reminded me not to take him for granted.

I phoned NHS Direct and the nurse told me to keep an eye on him. Thankfully he's recovered just fine.

x

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