Tea room the Eighth - sun, sea, sangria, and perhaps a sandy Mellors

[DontCallMeBaby]

Greetings, welcome to the eighth incarnation of the tearoom.

The tearoom has been, and will be again, a virtual safe haven for anyone up for rather random chat and a comprehensive range of virtual snacks. Nothing in the tearoom will make you fat, or drunk (unless you want it to) or cause an allergic reaction.

The new tearoom location is a beautiful beachside cafe (no need for factor 50, the virtual sun will just lightly tan you, bring out your freckles or simply warm your skin, as you prefer) with a range of garden swings, hammocks, sunloungers, deckchairs etc (as well as a rather incongruous, but well-loved, chaise longue). For those in need of sanctuary, we have managed to fashion a new priesthole out of woven grasses.

Our fellow residents include Mellors the rugged gardener of few-but-well-chosen words, the naked mohawk babies, a coterie of bishops, various domestic pets, and a selection of others. On the human side, all are welcome - while we live in the One Child topic some regulars have more than one, and we are welcome all (except people who put their heads on one side and tell those of us with one child that it's just not fair to have only one child).

Please help yourself to a glass of Champagne and a canape on the way in ...

JM - hope your consultant was pleased with the way your ladybits are going

Donk - I saw a bunch of your relatives today at the Surrey County Show! I haven't seen donkeys being Shown before, it was lovely . Glad yor Dad's RT is over - can I just tell you that my Dad is improving in leaps and bounds (well, sort of, not bad for a 75yo, anywya ) since his RT stopped on 7th May. He had started to really feel it in the last 2-3 weeks of treatment and was getting very tired and fed up and incapable of doing much, but he is bouncing back so fingers crossed your Dad recovers quickly too.

Surrey County Show was great fun - lots of farm animals to see, lots of "food" stands to avoid; we got to see a great sheep show by a Kiwi with a fab sense of humour (can we have one of them in the tearoom, do you think? Or would Mellors be upset?) and saw 2 sheep being sheared, one on stage and one about 3 feet away from us! Great weather for it (although DH's forehead does rather resemble a beacon now )

any of the pinot-giglio left from last night?

Hi Donk - good to see you again! Keeping your situation with your dad in my thoughts.

County show sounds lovely. Dsis and I watched some show jumping yesterday, then back to greet old friends who'd come round for dinner. And I managed not to do anything disastrous with the meal, which is a miracle.

Tea and toast available for those that need it. Off to deepest Wales today for a meeting with a colleague working on ASD academic thingies. And it's lashing it down with rain, so that'll be a wet walk to the uni.

Tea and toast sound good. Off to wake DH and Wriggle in a momment; just taking a minute for me. Wriggle a bit off colour and going to visit Nasty Doctor at 9am, DH has a virus AGAIN and another scan for his lungs next week so very nervous. and grumpy

Woken earlier by a phone call from another friend just going into labour who needs help with her two-year old. That's the third in six months. I do really like to help and I am really pleased for them I think. I am just realising that my role from now on will be Good Friend Who Helps Out and I will never have the star role or the great experiences again. And that maybe they would appreciate how I feel. I wish I was not the only person I know in this situation.

I am therefore feeling very empathetic to anyone's wobbles.

But I realise that this makes me sound very selfish and self centered when it is not AT ALL about me, anything which is going on for anyone at the moment.

Did I say how lovely it is to see you, Amber?

RS - ouch!

In the past week Milk has become more and more bossy and diva like (only child =spoilt brat???). I feel today is going to be a tough day of saying "no" a lot and "Ask in a polite way, please." as this seems to have reached IMO quite unsavory heights...

Cruel to be kind parenting....

ouch!

I'm teetotal actually, so I'll have a coke or a nice cuppa tea

it rained up here over the bank holiday and it was very hard keeping the wee one amused, she gets bored so quickly. took her to soft play and she got bored after 15 mins.

anyone got ideas to amuse her? Cheers!

Hiya all.

Especially to Scottishmummy of course. My DS is 16 months old and equally hard to please. I live in the north of Mexico in a semidesertic region, so I have the opposite problem, but with the same result: it's too hot to play out.

Top tips for bored toddlers:

1. Chasing toddler from room to room, and catching him/her every now and then and giving them a spin.

1. Dismantling cupboards. If you can cope and have a cupboard or two at floor level with innocous item like tupperware and pans, this can give hours of fun. Just let them empty, open boxes/pans, bang them together and generally make a mess. This is the way I get the cooking and the washing up done, usually.

1. Drag racing. Using a big washing basket I push DS around the floor while making silly "vroom vroom" noises. Later the same basket can be taken into the kitchen and painstakingly filled by said toddler with all the stuff he has removed from the cupboards.

1. Playing ball. Throwing the ball for him/her to find and practise throwing back.

Those are the ones that come to mind straightaway. But other can be derived just from the principal of "helping" mummy with what ever she is doing. My Ds loves copying at the minute.

Now pass the tea and biscuits I need a sit down.

Also, I seem to remember, indoor 'paddling pool' (bowl of water with toys standing in the bath), finger painting (also in the bath?)

Tea, I think this sort of thing creeps up on you with out you noticing that it is getting so bad. Then it can be hard to get back to acceptable behaviour. I notice it happens in class sometimes.

I am also noticing that Wriggle is getting very cheeky. I give her her supper and she says it is 'kaka'. I say sit down and she climbs onto the back of the chair. Today she spat out a piece of cake while we were at the farm park and I took the rest of her cake straight to the goat. That made her rather thoughtful.

Hello all -

Thanks RS.... I did not feed cake to a goat but I think the message is getting through - we are the bosses and you can do as you please within our boundaries little Milk. We need it and she needs it - so it is the best thing to make clear. She is currently building the Eiffel Tower out of wooden bricks and singing 'Lets go fly a kite' - It is a tale of two cities....

This afternoon was spent going from one office to another in search of tax papers - French tax is very complicated and if you fill in something wrong - even accidently like we once did - BAM - you have to pay mahooosive fines so Milk had to sit and be good rather than be centre of my universe - which I think was rather good for her!

scottishmummy - I have some ideas for you re entertaining a toddler- will pop back later with them - but I promised Milk we would watch The King and I together - so I best go and do it really.....

RS, thank you muchly. It's so good to be back and not be a nervous wreck. I really do think those three months of hell just built up into a burden I couldn't carry any more. But it was good to remind myself of the things I'm not able to do very well - I so need some reminders to be a bit cautious.

Ah now, bored children...hmm...we used to make 'playdough' out of flour water and a bit of salt and had hours of fun with it. Especially if there's paint to be had too - make shapes with it, dip them in the paint, dab it on the paper/mummy's walls/the floor/arrghhh!

And the saucepan orchestra, played with a wooden spoon (with me with my earplugs in).

Cardiff was fun. Haven't been there before. Have seen the castle, and the stadium, and got lost in the shopping centre, and found the university, and got offered another job (!) in ethics (!!?). Hadn't even gone there for a job! Wonder if I was in the wrong room? . Fell asleep on the train there and back, and didn't drop too many things today, so that's an improvement. Did manage to nearly fall over in the side street thanks to not seeing a bollard, but I'm used to that.

May I have a glass of virtual absolutely non-fermented alcohol free wine please? (that being of course the only variety we drink in the tea room ) (well, almost the only variety) (well, ok, actually some of us have been known to imbibe a weensy little bit of virtual alcohol now and again...)(hoping scottishmum doesn't read back too far ). Teas, coffees and beverages of your choice always available for those who wish to partake.

Oh look...a large plate of cheese and biscuits! Who'd like some?

thanks guys but we do most of those things already - definitely the cupboard trick, the chasing, and the bowl of water with spoons/cups/toys. we have megablocks, books, play tunnel, ball pool, musical instruments, every blooming disney dvd and night garden dvd, toy trampoline...you name it and she still gets bored! She goes to soft play once a week, rhymetimes, toddler groups, the park and a gym class and she's STILL bored

I'm like "we've been out all effing day, can I pleeeeeeeeease just sit on my bum?!?"

And my MIL is giving me the "have another" lecture again. Changing the subject and trying to give vague answers does NOT work

actually, forget the whole 'tee total' thing and gimmee a beer somebody!

PS I adore the king and I! I hope my wee one is into musicals

(her name is Niamh btw )

Lovely name!

Noooo, not the 'have another one' lecture! Yes, a virtual beer for you. Guaranteed guilt-free with no actual alcohol passing your lips.

(not that it's working - Mellors has been out somewhere and been slacking on his aga-fixing-duties, methinks )

Yummy- cheese and biscuits and iced fruit punch. thank you who ever left that on teh table, I shall have a glass as teh sun slips over teh hill behind us and teh shadows lengthen on teh beach. Just a few children left paddling in teh rock pools now , a few of you strolling along with your dogs running in teh shallows and I trust that is one of our mob over there in teh distance on a white horse cantering through teh gentle lapping wavelets.

ScotMumo1- they are a terror at that age arn't they, can;t do a thing by themselves, it does get better eventully,at least some of the time.
Play dough was one of our saving graces, boy was / is fairly happy to play with a lump of dough up on teh kitchen worktop while I cook. He stands on a chair and has plastic knives and fork and a little rolling pin. Other food related stuff used to hold his attention as well, transferring rice and pasta between bowls with a spoon etc. messy, but...
I did for spell have a big cardboard box in the kitchen full of junk for him to roootle around in, he liked sitting in it too and chattering way to me, which I could sort of screen out. It did take time to train himto play y himself, a lot of sitting watching him and gradully withdrawing. now I can read abook on a good day, and do nowt on a bad one. I tried to do some work today while boy " played" in my workshop, didn;t work. He wanted too much attension and I got cross with his constant asking " what you doing, what that, what lives here, where that go... ARRRRRRGH

Hello all and especially Scottishmummyof1, lovely to meet you and we hope we're not going to scare you away with our imbibing antics .

Thank you to everyone who remembered my appointment with the surgeon - she was delighted with the state of my insides and I have been officially discharged. I did ask her about the weird belly pain I'd been having and she pulled a very concerned face, left the room (leaving me thinking WTF??) and came back trailing the ultrasound machine. [impressed emoticon] because I was dreading being told "go back to your GP and have her refer you for an ultrasound scan. I guess those are the perks of being referred to a department head in the Reproductive Health section... anyhoo, I'm sure you all know where the ultrasound wand went , which was Not Fun, but eventually, after much poking and prodding and wiggling about of my insides [double] she said she thought it was because my hormones may be starting to kick back in and get ready to get the factory going again, so to speak, and because I am one of those Attachment-Parenting, Breastfeed-Until-They're-in-University type hippies, my ovaries and uterus have been mothballed, in a manner of speaking, and it can be a bit achy and tender at times when the cobwebs crack away. She saw no evidence of adhesions or endometriosis, just a very estrogen-rich uterine lining and very busy ovaries, so that's good. It also means that DH and I will be revisiting the "Have The Snip" conversation in earnest, very soon.

Is it wine o'clock yet where most of you lots live?

Wine o'clock here Thursday I'll be with your timezone though

Huzzah for JM's insides

LOL

yes yes yes JM - wine o clock it is.

I am very much into Chablis of late - fancy a glass with me?

Scottishmummy...

I find going out as much as possible is very important for toddlers.

Sorry for everyone who knows this already.....

We spend the morning hanging out getting chores done mning, playing lego, having long bath (Milk) shower (me) have some lunch then go out. Only in very very very bad weather do we stay in.

We go to lots of parks, museums, the library, the swimming pool, the local indoor shopping centre, art galleries, book shopping, the cinema (but I think Milk was 2 when we first went), sometimes just to a pretty or friendly part of the city to sip coffee (me) or strawberry milk (Milk) and watch the world go by....

Milk was also, at 15months, a big fan of Gymboree - a tumble tots style club. Do you go to a baby/toddler club?

We also usually have some project on the go. Maybe a birthday card to make (I found aged one me drawing a shape and Milk sticking little round stickers on it looked great and water colours are surprisingly easy for little ones to do and not nearly so messy as poster paints), presents for family (we made a big bunch of paper flowers for Milk's Grandmama when Milk was about 15months old - they have place of pride on her living-room shelves, still, today!) or something inspired from our outings.

It is not ideal - we still have some groggy days.... but it does seem to work for us quite well most days.

I hope this is of help.

Ah HAH me hearties!!!

Did you recognise me? I'm being BlackBeard. I think the World of Toddlers has finally got to me

Welcome Scottishmummyof1!

Donk & Thumb glad that treatment phase is over for your Dad's. Hard uphill work that it is

Racing so sorry for your Best Friend In Extremis thing. You can be generous and envious at the same time you know, and you are not the only one - we're here!

MadBad and CMOT sorry for your wibbles too - CMOT your boy sounds so lovely with his cuddling up and your generosity having people over - we've never had a friend sleep over - perhaps we are just congenitally unfriendly

Amber love your view on why the tearoom works for you - it's very madness is its sanity no?

JM hurrah for your ladybits, does that mean you might be doing some cocktail inspired action soon

Love sound of country fair, sheep, Kiwis (imaginging Amber's view of it as well) Mr B and all happy goings on

We've been away. It was jolly. And hot. There was a trampoline. DH wants to move to the country!!!

Pass the Pino-Gigglio-Pimms I know, hard as nails with a working day tomorrow me

evening all!
pinotgigliopimms for me too I think, ta muchly.

T42 and RS, I am in sympathy with you, miniThumb has decided that his dinner is poison and I am trying to do away with him - the histrionics involved would be hysterically funny if I wasn't so peed off that he won't eat anything! Tonight I told him that I'd had enough and I wouldn't bother feeding him any more.

SMO1 - have you got any train track and battery trains? miniThumb is currently entranced by his and it keeps him quiet for a fair while.

daisy - my late night tearoom compadre, glad you had a nice away-time - my DH would happily move to the country, he says, but instead of course we're moving country, if the blasted visa thing ever comes through. Had my chest x-ray today - oh joy.

JM - hurrah for your ladybits being signed off! good news, not so good for mr.JM if it's time for the 2 half-bricks

Ah Thumb hellowah! >

Ah, the whole food thing. I just let DaisyBoy spit it out and then pop it back in when he's not looking. Toys at the table. That's the way forward for us

By the way, UniS I want details about the train! And photos. I am envious

I tried the 3 spoon trick and it worked for a while - he has 1 spoon in each hand, tries to feed himself and I use the 3rd and whack in a spoonful every now and then while he's concentrating on loading his 2 spoons - but sadly he's got wise to that trick now and I can only manage 1 spoonful every few mins, cos he clams up and does the "I'd sooner have my head fall off than open my mouth to whatever that is" look. He also has a relatively new habit of smackin his hands to his face, covering himself in dinner that he has slapped off the spoon...

Surely it can't be good for him to only eat chocolate spread and milk and biscuit?

well, if the biscuit is a spinach biscuit it sounds like an ideal balanced diet!

my problem is the opposite. Daisyboy just wouldn't eat at all....

I wish! I did contemplate making vegetable biscuits at one stage but kind of fell at the first hurdle [guilty] - I can only console myself with the fact that they are pretty wholesome as biscuits go, no sugar as such, sweetened with dried banana powder or somesuch!
And sometimes he just won't eat at all - they're the worst.

Boo hiss to lack of eating. It will pass

Lovely to see Donk earlier. Any word from DCMB?