Tea room the Eighth - sun, sea, sangria, and perhaps a sandy Mellors

[DontCallMeBaby]

Greetings, welcome to the eighth incarnation of the tearoom.

The tearoom has been, and will be again, a virtual safe haven for anyone up for rather random chat and a comprehensive range of virtual snacks. Nothing in the tearoom will make you fat, or drunk (unless you want it to) or cause an allergic reaction.

The new tearoom location is a beautiful beachside cafe (no need for factor 50, the virtual sun will just lightly tan you, bring out your freckles or simply warm your skin, as you prefer) with a range of garden swings, hammocks, sunloungers, deckchairs etc (as well as a rather incongruous, but well-loved, chaise longue). For those in need of sanctuary, we have managed to fashion a new priesthole out of woven grasses.

Our fellow residents include Mellors the rugged gardener of few-but-well-chosen words, the naked mohawk babies, a coterie of bishops, various domestic pets, and a selection of others. On the human side, all are welcome - while we live in the One Child topic some regulars have more than one, and we are welcome all (except people who put their heads on one side and tell those of us with one child that it's just not fair to have only one child).

Please help yourself to a glass of Champagne and a canape on the way in ...

It's OK, Tea. I wasn't really offended and it is interesting to reflect on how one's posting style might or might not have changed. I was reluctant to post on that thread again because (amongst the many posts which are thoughtful and thought-provoking, even if one doesn't agree with them) there are some quite destructive ones and I wouldn't want anyone who was struggling with having only one child to see them. So I kind of regret that I would have put the thread in active convos again.

Cmot - It is very noble of you to iron CmotBloke's shirt! I'm glad he got home unscathed.

I think I'll have a pina colada. Anyone else?

cmot - sorry about the awful drunken night and your frets - I have had a few of them myself. They are scary - a thousand things go round your mind and won't stop!

One time I must admit... it was actually me creeping in at 6am ... but...

it was because I got confused because the metro times had changed and the clocks changed that night too I really had only had two glasses of wine... well that is what I told dh anyway who disappointingly had gone to bed at ten and not missed me or fretted at all!!!!

!!!!

Happy Birthday CMOT boy.

Welcome Home Mrs A . Your duvet is still in teh preist hole should you need it. The NMB have been sternly warned NOT To touch it and NOT to make teeny tiny duvets out of it.

My dad is a Lay Weeder at their church - one who tidies up in teh churchyard. also a bell ringer. Mum is in Choir and does a turn on Teas/ coffees and sometimes sunday school.
I do like teh cartoon church- thank you for sharing that site with us. Had to LO at eth guide to greenbelt, brought back memories. Havn't been since boy arrived.

I will be taking scones to teh county show- but just for our picnic, NOT to enter any kind of competition . We are a bit short of bread and DH didn;t respond to my hinting by baking any more while I was out, so scones were al I could realisticly make in teh short time I had. They are VERY good scones tho. ANy body like to try- rather yummy with clotted cream and jam from the garden.

arsey arse - wish I'd read MadBad's last post before I went and posted on that thread where yappybluedog was. especially as I doubt I was anything like as insightful or sensitive. ah well.

Still enjoying the cut and thrust of the Great Pasta Debate though!

We have the Surrey County Show this BH Monday, which I think we will attend as both Mr Thumb & miniThumb really enjoyed the Newbury Show last year.

Happy Birthday (very late) to CMOTD boy - hope he had a lovely day, despite hungover Daddy!

Bit late for cocktails - I made Mr. Thumb buy an early pg test kit today from Tesco - imagine his embarrassment when a Mum from TumbleTots saw him there - he realised that although the top shelf was for pg test kits, all the shelves below were filled with condoms! Interesting marketing technique, I feel! . Of course I could just wait but I am supposed to go for a chest x-ray this week for immigration medical, and I need to know before I go if I am pg because then I can be exempted from the x-ray and save £70! Fingers crossed...

Dh is making bread tomorrow and is going to bake an extra one to take on holiday with us

Jacksmama, are you around? Can you answer this MNer's question?

amber, I expect you (and all the other more sane members of the tearoom) have gone to bed by now but someone is asking after you here. I was nearly going to post something there but then thought No, I must tell amber and let her decide for herself whether or not she wants to let anyone know.

Hello you chatty lot!

Sorry to miss you but very glad to miss the Ermine Tufted Naked Bishops!

Welcome home Amber - nice to see you in the P

Glad Justa has good news, and fingers crossed for you Thumb - have you done the test?

CMOT - I don't believe the 2 glasses of wine at all 2 bottles more like! But happy birthday CMOTtiddler and glad all well

Lol at deconstruction of church. Vergers trim the grass round the graves - thought everyone knew that? The grave diggers haven't had a mention yet and there are some vey high church thingys going on in this seaside parish!

One table, one cup, one plate, one cross, one vicar. All you need and bob's your uncle

What about curate, prelate, PCC, the boundary walking bloke, deacon, lay deacon, deaconess, belisha beacon? ....

Perhaps I am not taking this seriously enough, will go for a slow comfortable pina colada (Daisy mixes her drinks hic!)

doing it in the morning daisy - best time apparently, highest concentration of appropriate hormones if they are there!

Really should go to bed - have been up far too long and it is DH's birthday tomorrow so he won't be happy if I'm all tired and grumpy!

Fingers crossed for you Thumb.

I also glean from the general conversation -I think- that Justa's scan went well on Monday. I am very pleased to hear it.

Not that I would recommend pg at the minute. I feel like crap and have done for a number of weeks; the anti-nausea pill shave stopped working, I have had migraines and generally feel like I weigh 50 stone everytime I have to walk somewhere.

Dr. says I better get a test on my thyroid to see if I haven't a problem there. We'll see.

Thumb, will go look at thread you mentioned.

I just had a brief look at the thread you're mentioed, tea and madbad - I see some of the usual suspects back in fine form ...

I have let the disabled parents thread know, so thanks for pointing me in that direction.

Large cup of tea needed, I think. Funerals (and gatherings relating to them) of my two old friends happening today/tomorrow.

Vergers trim the grass verges? That would make more sense, I have to say.

Hello everyone else. I'm so glad I'm still welcome in here

Thumbwitch, keeping everything crossed for you.

Amberlight - My best friend's Father suddenly died last year. When I went to the funeral I promised myself I wouldn't cry - to be strong for her....

I sobbed through the whole service and a bit after too.

I think saying goodbye is so hard and will be thinking about you lots over the next few days. xxxxxx

daisy - hello to you!!!!

JM - The thread was an old one that had been added to recently. We are hoping yappybluedog will join us here soon!

thumbwitch - HOW exciting GOOD LUCK for this morning's wee!!!! He he he!!!!!

Catita - Here is a basket of fruit - with a card saying "Hope you feel better soon xxx"

morning ladies - well it wasn't to be, DH didn't get the birthday present he was hoping for and I still have to have a chest x-ray after all. but never mind - I think it's probably better this way as the intense stress of the next few weeks surely wouldn't be good for any little developers!

Crying at funerals is quite cathartic, I find - before my Grandad died he kept telling us that he didn't want us to be sad and cry for him, cos he wanted to "go" - but, as we pointed out, we wouldn't be sad for him, we were sad for US because we would miss him. Nothing wrong with that.

amber, I hope it goes smoothly for all concerned.

catita - hope you perk up soon - it's not always fun, this pg lark, is it - I remember that I really didn't enjoy being pg, even though I was lucky enough to escape the sickness last time.

Sorry to hear that thumbwitch

Am a bit puzzled how you pat someone on the tea, Amberl, is this some sort of tea room code for something I am not aware of?

Good grief, I must have needed tea more than I realised!

TW, drat and triple drat. Very large cup of something for you, then.

I'm hoping they have better luck than we did with Dad's one. The vicar was extremely drunk and we spent much of it wondering if he was going to fall over if he let go of the lectern!

If it's not a completely silly question, does anyone know of a sort of relaxation therapy that wouldn't involve anything scary for small Ambers? Bearing in mind I'm nervous of being touched because of the skin sensitivity and can't handle perfumey things? Trying to think of something to help me sleep and get a bit more restored-to-my-usual-self.

not a silly question amber. lots of amber-like and non-amber-like people don't like to be touched or have smell sensitivity.

Can I recommend the Rescue Remedy to you? You can buy simple rescue remedy from any Holland & Barrett's shop; but if youhave an independent health food shop near you they might have a better one called Ainsworth's Emergency Recovery Plus. This is better because it has no alcohol in it and it works better, in my opinion and experience, and I and my Dad used it to great effect when dealing with my Mum's death.

Both rescue remedy and emergency recovery plus are mouth-administered - the rescue remedy usually comes as drops, which you can put under the tongue or in a glass of water (the commonest one contains a tiny amount of preservative brandy); the recovery plus is a spray for under the tongue.

Breathing techniques for relaxation might help you too - I'm not very good at these as I always fall asleep before I've got much further than relaxing my knees - maybe JM has more info on these?

I use breathing and meditation techniques too. I like sensory objects to help me relax too though, which probably won't appeal to you! Candles, a picture to focus on, incense cones/sticks (thurible can be a bit overpowering in a house ), relaxation music (I like Taize music), something to read that is relaxing (although not if I'm trying to sleep), things like that. With practice I've learned to empty my mind of all thoughts, which is really useful (except I forget to do it when I'm feeling overwhelmed! )

Definitely can't do breathing techniques - tried those before a few times and it Didn't Go Well. I do have rescue remedy available, but not sure it works the usual way on me (many things don't - slightly odd chemistry to many of us). I do use pictures to focus on, but I was looking at a sign today outside the physio saying "relaxation massage" and thinking I'd love to find something like that, but something I could actually do/cope with.

Today's 'soup a la tearoom' will be lightly spiced three bean, or a warming turnip and potato broth for those that find beans a bit lively. Very glad to see the Bishops are off for their trip inland, by the way - I think they've eaten all the biscuits.

I find a forced relaxation technique works quite well for me - lie down in dark room, close eyes, and concentrate on one bit of body at a time and visualise that relaxing, then move slowly up the body.

Massaging (really quite firmly as I don't like light touches) the bit between my thumb and first finger, or my instep seems to work well too

Bad luck TW

Sorry you have to pay for your x-ray, TW. Perhaps you'll be luckier soon.

Amber: I also have an great aversion to being touched/massaged. They stress me out no end. When I was first diagnosed with diabetes and then put my back out almost rightaway and was laid up in bed, stressing, for months I tried a variety of things, weird and wonderful, to help me relax.

Two things actually worked:

1. A relaxation tape, which basically walks you through what CMOT was saying, and helps to relax muscles you never knew you had.

1. Watching old episodes of terrible sitcoms. It was my dr.s suggestion. He said, you need to laugh, look for something to make you laugh. So I watched Friends, Dads Army and assorted wonders day after day on my lap. I think the sitcom part is optional, what I mean to say is do something that will make you laugh a lot, regularly for a few days.

Good luck with the funeral. I think crying helps myself. It lets out the pent up emotion quite well. Its just if you can cope with doing it in public (not for me! I must say) I tend to wait until I am alone and then let it go. Daft, but it makes me feel better.

I wonder whether Alexander technique might be helpful Amber - its a relaxation technique that you can use throughout your day - I use quite a few of the techniques when I play - and I know that there are books on the subject even if you don't want to go along for any lessons (I saw someone with a book on it on the bus this evening)

TW - sorry

how about long baths with teh dog? I seem to remember a book I read with boy called " taking a bath with teh dog and other things that make me happy" it was a picture book for under 5s if that makes it easier to find in teh library :-) NOTHING to do with relaxation techniques, just a nice book.

County show was great fun. Boy had a big tractor fix, also quad bikes. he was very taken by teh quad bike stunt show.. spent next 20 mins being a quad bike rider with full sound effects and a LOT of crashes.

I'm going to settle down here and unwind with a pulp book and teh sound of teh waves to lull me to sleep. tank you for teh blankets mellors. its bit nippy out here tonight.

Milk kept asking to have a bath with MIL's dog when we were there at the weekend - I feel bad now for saying no!!!!!

tiptoes off to find said book.... sounds like a good one!