The SIXTH Tea Room - Everyone Welcome

[Jacksmama]

The One Child Tea Room started as a sort of sanctuary for anyone who was a bit tired of the controversy surrounding having one child only, for whatever reason. The topic seems to attract that sort of thing. So we thought we needed a place where a cup of tea and a muffin and a place to sit down and relax was needed - and judging by the number of visitors and regulars, it really was much needed!

The tea room has since undergone a few, shall we say, metamorphoses... it started as a charming bricks and mortar sort of place, with a lovely English garden, a ha-ha in the distance, and wonderful mismatched crockery.

But since the tea room is truly magical, at night, the glitter ball comes out, and booze and sofas canapees are served. During the daytime, there is a stable with (at last count) two horses, Earl and Lady Grey, who appreciate being exercised. We also have (at last count) two guinea pigs, RacingPig and RacingMissPiggy... but since they seem to have been up to no good, that count may increase shortly.

In its most recent incarnation, the tea room became a yurt, and we had Mellors The Gardener show up in buckskin trousers and no shirt (which caused several of the regulars to either fan themselves with whatever magazines were available, or faint prettily, preferably into Mellors' arms), and there seems to have been an errant bison or two.
Oh, and we also had the Naked Mohawk Babies - they were originally cake decorations (for the life of me, I cannot find the link right now) - and they have since taken on lives of their own, adding much amusement to the tea room.

Decorations include cut-outs of George Clooney, Wesley Snipes, and any other hunks of burning love we can think of. Oh, and peace lilies, and (since nothing seems to be able to kill the damn thing) an aspidistra.

For those who are shy of company, or fleeing controversial threads, we have a Priest Hole to hide relax in.

Please remember that the tea room is magical - no amount of Bolly swilled will cause a hangover, allergies of any type mean nothing, so you can eat and drink whatever you like, and if you don't fancy the distressed-looking couch, a brand-new comfy arm chair will appear in seconds.

EVERYONE is welcome, whether you have one child, none, or ten. In fact, one of our regulars is currently pregnant!!

The only strict rule we enforce is no fisticuffs. Anyone who behaves disagreeably will be ejected by Mellors (fully clad).

Most important of all - the tea room is meant for fun and support. It's perfectly acceptable, and in fact, mandatory, to be a little unhinged yourself.

Welcome all!!

(I've had a somewhat trying day so I will leave the crating and moving of china, and the actual shaping of the tea room, to everyone else... I did hear rumours of a spa being added, however, so please, book me in for a pedicure, will you? Thanks!)

[teafortwo]

Catita - We need more pics of your scrummy boy!!!! He is sooooooo soooooo luuurvely!!!!



Today on the smooth, slick, sexy Eurostar back to Paris Milk wanted to do up the lid on a water bottle. She always does the thread a bit craply and it always always always leaks if she does it so I wanted to do it up after her before putting it into my handbag. I had just managed to do it up when Milk noticing what I was upto whipped said bottle from my hands screamed "NO MILK DO IT!" and threw the bottle full force across the carriage in anger at me re-doing what she considered to be perfect work - Unfortunately it landed on a 'just so' French woman's head who said "Oh la, aiya; tut tut tut!" in a very cross way. And who can blame her??? The plastic bottle had very little water in so the scene could have been much worse but even so - what a shock!!!!

So, Milk and I said sorry and then spent the rest of the journey avoiding anyone in carriage 2 and specifically the "Oh la" lady by hiding out in the cafe carriage munching pringles in a regretful manner and when we ran out of sterling we shifted to where the bags are stored and played quietly with her new Peter Rabbit then with a girl called Eloise who joined us... Milk had cheered up by this stage so all was zen.... but still, right now, I type to you with deep and terrible shame at the whole water bottle scene....

[teafortwo]

psssssssst - The lid was firmly on so lady did not get wet... just a rather nasty and surprising bump on the head from evian bottle - which is bad enough!

[Catitainahatita]

Evening all,

Mistle rather bizarrely the scan gave me exactly the same due date as counting from the 1st day of my last period. Last time it varied wildly in a four week due date window. I was various due in the last week of December 2006 to the third week in January. So, I set no faith in the scan either. DS appeared on 6 Jan (ECS after a uninspiring and prolonged labour going nowhere culminating in the discovery that the reason that DS appeared to be in distress was that the cord was round his throat...). The Doc says it will be a planned CS this time seeing as I had to have a vertical rather than a horizontal section due to many complications. She wants me have him//her at 37 weeks, but I think I'll be holding out for 38 or even 39 if I can.
Passing the magic 11 week mark has made me a whole lot more optimistic. Last time I made it this far, DS stayed around for the duration. Hopefully this will be repeated this time.

Jacksmama 6 years in Texas, wow! That's quite an achievement I think I'm not sure I have the stomach [I am thinking of the quantities of food that they seem to put away) for it

[Catitainahatita]

And Tea, many comiserations for the Evian incident. I hope you smiled and shrugged gallicly at he C'est la vie, after all.

[Catitainahatita]

Ok all,

Get packing those boxes. Wake up Mellors and saddle the horses, the seventh heaven tea room has materialised,rather like Captain Kirk beaming down from the Enterprise, somewhere beyond the ha ha into a neighbouring field.

we'd better get there quickly before the NMBs hog all the good chairs!!