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One-child families

Got questions about only having one child? Find the answers here.

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Original poster

Do you know other families in RL with one child?

46 replies

Lasvegas · 13/10/2008 13:32

DD's class has 20 children in it, she is the only one without siblings. It is a Catholic School though so maybe not represenative of society at large. Out of all the people I know only 2 other people (work colleagues) have sole children. I am in greater London. I am interested in your experiences.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Bucharest · 14/10/2008 17:38

I'm in Italy which has the highest rate of only children in Europe (lowest birth rate I believe overall) so dd is not the only only by a long shot.

DrNortherner · 14/10/2008 17:41

On Sunday we went to a friends house, ds was playing with her son who is also 6 and in his class at school. Her ds has a 3 year old sister who would not leave the boys alone, she wanted to play bless her but they would not let her join in and tried to shut her out of the bedroom.

The Mum kept insisting the boys HAD to play with her.

As I only have 1 kid where do you draw the line on this? Should teh 2 boys have been allowed to play without little sis joining in?

squeaver · 14/10/2008 20:52

I don't know any but have a friend with dts and I know she wouldn't have had any more if she'd only had one (lots of gruelling IVF).

All dds friends have younger siblings and all the little ones adore her because she's delighted to play with them and gives them lots of attention. Then she's quite happy to leave them and go home (hmm, just like her mother in years gone by...)

lottien · 15/10/2008 17:28

Quite a lot - in her last school 2 out of 4 of of dd's closest friends were onlies, the other two are 2s. If you ignore half siblings with a big age gap you can add one of her cousins and there were plenty of others in her class. Now we've moved to another town where the demographics are a bit different but even so there are at least 2 in her class.
When your DC's at someone else's house it's a bit much to expect the siblings not to join in but what used to drive me mad with one of her friends was that I could never invite her round without having her older sister too and then I nearly fell out with the mum because the older sister's behavior was inappropriate and I had to have words.

LindzDelirium · 16/10/2008 13:20

DD's best friend (since nursery) is an only, and I find we get on with his parents really well as they have to same "only-outlook" as us

There are 2 other "onlies" in DD's class, one is an only due to medical reasons and the other one's Dad jumped ship so Mum didn't have naymore but would like more.

Marne · 16/10/2008 13:24

most dd1's friends are olny children, my neighbour has one little girl (not having anymore due to having her late in life), another neighbour has one boy (would like another but can't afford to move), dd's best friend is an only child.

darkpunk · 16/10/2008 13:26

in my ds class of 30..only one child is an only..but it is a catholic school.

Podrick · 30/10/2008 20:57

My best friend has an only child
My godchild is an only child
Lots of dd's classmates are only children - they are the ones that go out and do things the most!

Reallytired · 09/11/2008 12:23

I know lots of only children in real life in my son's year 2 class. A lot of people have huge age gaps due to the astronomical cost of childcare, but having the need to work because of a huge mortgage.

There are three mums (including me) whose only child is six or seven years old, but have another one on the way who have children in my son's class.

I don't know if my son's best friend counts as an only child or not. He had a baby sister who died at birth and his parents are too grief stricken to completemate having another child. His mother would argue that she has two children, but one is in Heaven. However in many ways this little boy is in a similar position to an only child.

rebelmum72 · 09/11/2008 12:39

Some very interesting points in these posts. I hadn't thought about whether onlies tend to gravitate towards other onlies, and my ds is too young (20mo)to be able to tell yet.

But he does tend to get on better (if such a thing is possible at that age!) with other children who are like him - more quiet and calm rather than loud and running around a lot.

Oh, and to answer the OP, just quickly going over people I know, there are a couple with 3 kids, a few with 2, but the vast majority has only 1 - I think the situation here in Germany is similar to Italy, v. low birth rates and a tendency towards only one child.

dizzydixies · 09/11/2008 12:45

my brother and sil have only one child and my best friend and her partner have one too

mamadiva · 09/11/2008 12:49

Erm...

My SIL now you mention it cant think of anyone else.

Mercy · 09/11/2008 12:57

I can think of 9 off the top of my head

3 of them are ds' friends, 2 are dd's friends

UniS · 29/11/2008 19:42

It seems we know fewer singletons every month as people are getting stuck into having siblings.
However my BF has just one and no plans for more. Our two boys are best of friends/ enemies and we do think this is fine as they are as close to brotherhood as either will get.
Finding people to do stuff with is getting harder as the number of multi child families in our social circle goes up. Its harder to car share, harder to work things round nap times and feed times, harder to find activities appropriate for all concerned.

BoccaDellaVerita · 29/11/2008 20:45

Uni - I know what you mean. Is your child at school yet? I found things got easier then, as friends can walk home with us for tea and juggling cars/needs of younger siblings becomes less of an issue.

UniS · 01/12/2008 21:10

nope- hes not even at preschool yet. Thankfully my Best friend also only has one boy ( a yr older than my boy and at preschool) so we do quite a few things together after preschool.

Daisy15 · 05/12/2008 21:06

I also live in greater london (north) and i know what you mean. It seems everyone is having loads of kids or none at all.

My Best friend and i both have one and tbh i think i am soooo happy to have one. If i was ever to have another i think i would adopt.

nappyaddict · 05/12/2008 21:09

I know loads of people at toddlers with only one child in RL but they are all 4 and under so not sure that's representative either really.

Oh actually 2 of my friends at work have only 1 DD. They are 11 and 8.

Gunnerbean · 09/12/2008 21:48

My best friend has only one (who rather conveniently is my DS's best friend too!). She also had only one out of choice, like me.

There are a couple in my DS's class too and I also work with two women who have only children (although they would have like more but couldn't due to being "repreductively challenged" for want of a better term.

I also have another very good friend who has two children but wishes that she'd stopped at one!

Dibsie · 10/12/2008 13:51

I'm an only child and, as far as I can remember, was the only only child all through school. My son's in a reception class of 49 and I think he's one of two only children. He finds it difficult during the school holidays as all his friends are off doing things with their siblings.

Iklboo · 10/12/2008 13:53

I'm an only
DS is an only
Nephew is an only
At least 3 colleagues at work have onlies

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