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Not coping today

4 replies

DeborahVancesBeehive · 16/12/2025 09:02

I had a very unexpected pregnancy in the summer at the age of 44. It lasted just long enough for me to get over the shock and start getting excited, then I miscarried. I had really mixed feeling about it, I would have worried about disabilities because of my age but that was outweighed by the idea of having another and giving dd a sibling.

The thing is that it had exactly the same due date and it's two weeks away. I keep having flashbacks to my first pregnancy, starting to really nest about now and having a Christmas baby. I had bad antenatal anxiety first time round and I couldn't wait to do it properly this time.

I keep unexpectedly reading about miscarriage and having waves of excruciating grief. Dh is being a real arse at the moment about something else and I can't talk to him because it's my grief and I don't have space for his as well. I just needed to tell someone who has probably been through the same thing that I'm not coping today. I know it will pass but today is shit.

OP posts:
Sunnywalkslongtalks · 16/12/2025 09:06

Sending hugs to you ❤
treat yourself to a nice hot chocolate, a bath or reading a book in peace when you can and be gentle to yourself x

AnyIdeasDilemma · 16/12/2025 09:39

It's tough losing a pregnancy. I sometimes remember the baby I lost would be 16 now. Don't feel bad about feeling bad, it's a big thing to process.

Spend time doing nice things for yourself and your child but you need to grieve a bit too. Hugs.

LegoVsFoot · 13/02/2026 13:04

I'm so sorry you're going through a painful time. I found out I was pregnant on my son's last birthday so this year I had a very painful and sad few days. I just hugged my son extra tight and made sure to be thankful of all that we have, to feel the feelings and reflect on how I can use them to improve our lives today. Sending a lot of love to you xxx

E: sorry I didn't see that this thread was posted a while ago. Hope you are ok today 💓

DeborahVancesBeehive · 14/02/2026 10:53

LegoVsFoot · 13/02/2026 13:04

I'm so sorry you're going through a painful time. I found out I was pregnant on my son's last birthday so this year I had a very painful and sad few days. I just hugged my son extra tight and made sure to be thankful of all that we have, to feel the feelings and reflect on how I can use them to improve our lives today. Sending a lot of love to you xxx

E: sorry I didn't see that this thread was posted a while ago. Hope you are ok today 💓

Edited

It's very sweet of you to comment. Leading up to my due date was awful, it's like the body remembers. It's been better since but every now again I get this painful this when I remember I'll never have another child x

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