One and done due to state of the world?

[ThisOliveTraybake]

I have one DD who is 2 and everything I had hoped for in a child. I always imagined having two children, but in the past few months the reality of trying for another is worrying me a lot! I had a great pregnancy and birth, my husband is amazing, I found the newborn days very tough with sleep deprivation and anxiety, but I got through it before and I know I could do it again. Me and my husband are both close to our siblings, and I know not everyone is, but I would love that for my DD.

I am having doubts around bringing another life into this world of climate change, AI taking jobs, and cost of living crisis. We could just about afford another one but it would obviously cost more. I do think though life can be easier with siblings, so selfishly having another child could make it easier on my first in the long run, especially when me and my DH are old and need care. But if we did have twins, or a child who needed additional care, that would be tougher on her.

I am also a generally anxious person and a worrier, so I don’t know if I’m just overthinking everything. I know so many people in a much worse financial position who have multiple babies without seeming to worry at all! Am I overthinking? Is anyone else having these thoughts, and what did they decide?

Don’t have a second child to make it easier when you are old and need care. 🙄

I have 4DCs. They're very close & the bond between them all is something I cherish. Four DCs was always my dream when I imagined myself as a mum when I was younger, and I never wavered from that in my head.

However, they range in age from 15 to 30. I consider myself so lucky to have had them when I did, because I know that if I was thinking of expanding my family from one to two DCs in 2025, the state of the world would almost certainly prevent me. I think I would stop at either one, or at a push, two DCs.

To clarify I didn’t mean to care for us, just siblings to emotionally support each other if we are old / when we are gone! I am just trying to think long term

There have been challenges since every generation, always something to fear or be worried about.

"The state of the world" is such an abstract thing, I literally cant fathom considering it as part of my family planning.

I had a 2nd child because I wanted a second child. Everything else was a secondary consideration. - can I afford it? Do I have capacity? Etc...

I agree with this. Children shouldn't be brought into this world to fulfill the needs of the eldest. It reminds me of that book "my sisters keeper".

Some siblings get on, some don't but I wouldn't be basing the decision on whether to have a second based on a hypothetical situation in 60 years time. Siblings are not the only sole support for someone and in many cases (mine for one), they offer zero support. Your child isn't going to be alone with no support, they might be married, have children of their own, friends, in-laws, colleagues, extended family.

Have one because you want one. But don't have one because they need to be emotional crutches for each other.

I'm not sure about the "state of the world" comment either. You've already brought one child into this world, so why would it be any different for a second.

There will still be jobs going about, the cost of living crisis has to end sometime. There's been worse periods in time to be born and everything isn't always doom and gloom.