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Can't stop thinking about having another baby

2 replies

Ririi · 22/10/2023 23:20

I have a 2yo, he is so precious and I adore every moment with him. He is getting bigger and more independent... and I cannot stop thinking about having another baby sometime soon.

I am scared it will ruin my relationship with my first baby. We are almost inseparable, we bedshare and I work part time so that I can spend more time together. My partner is 100% supportive with as childcare costs it doesn't really matter if I work or not... Honestly the days when it is just the two of us are great, we go on little dates and I am loving it.

I wonder how having an another baby will spoil my perfect balance... how do I plan and prepare to keep the family peace?

is there a good age gap, so that they all feel they have enough parental attention and time? Is it better to wait until he is in pre-school/reception so that I can focus on the baby during the week?

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rosydreams · 23/10/2023 09:08

i had a second child when my daughter was 8 they love each other it just got better.Have one when you feel ready,let your first be involved in choosing clothes and read story books about new siblings.I left it at two children we are very happy

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SleepingStandingUp · 23/10/2023 09:18

20 years?

I mean the reality is, it will change it all. Some worse, some better. It's always a balance.
You maintain the 121 time with BOTH kids by having a decent partner who co-parents and doesn't "do you a favour" by "babysitting" for you.

I don't think there is a magic gap. Kids vary. Pregnancies vary. I had a very poorly first born, it would have massively affected my relationship with an older child but that's not a reason to not have a 2nd. I had twins after that which has certainly changed the dynamics with the older one but also how I thought raising the "2nd" child would be. We knew it was a chance of twins, it didn't stop us.

If you're craving a 2nd, work out maybe when you get free hours for the eldest at 3 and aim past that
Then you get alone time with baby and can give DS more focused time once DH is home

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