Only child, quiet street no friends nearby

[Thislife55555]

I have jjsy made a post re support needed as struggling but as a side note my DC who is almost 4 is too on the ball knows there's a girl nextdoor but she's only just over 1.5 so far to young to play & I have asked to do play dates but the mum isn't forthcoming, did say wherever suited her but quite rightly she may feel she's to young etc or as she seems to have a lot of family and younger with same age friends/kids doesn't feel the need. Our DC has no cousins or siblings I have a few friends
Wirh kids but all driving distance away, im worried that im the not to distant future she needs friends to come round/vice versa & she has no one locally atm, the one girl mate we did play date with will now be going to school in sept in another area so that's sadly not worked out, we do play date when we all can but I'm thinking we may need to move to a busier area, has anyone else found themselves in this position? Only child, no siblings, cousins or many kids close by? I feel abs terrible aboit it all like it's making me feel so guilty as this doesn't feel right and all. She starts school in sept so perhaps it'll improve them but locally near us im not so sure as there is just no girls in the street 🥹

Tbf I agree with them mum I wouldn't be sending my 18 month over for a play date with a 4 year old and I wouldn't have a 4 year old over for a "play date" either she probably thinks you want a babysitter, wait till she starts School

@Nachobowls totallly, she's far to young, it's just highlighted to me that there is no one else really girl wise except a boy down the road whose mum does ask to meet up, he's only 2 but is so much bigger and plays quite well so I'm glad at least she has this but generally thinking I'm not sure on where we live. There is someone I know on SM who lives on our council estate and regularlyy posts of she son (he is 5) plays at the kids on the estate houses and I feel bad that we just don't have that as much where we are. Thing is I also grew up on a council estate and knew only of so many kids being close by and loved it but DP isn't keen to live on one as you can have some issues but then here it's jjsy unlucky where we are I think just not as many kids close by similar age 🤦‍♀️

Have you tried the Peanut app? I used it to find local mums with similar ages kids and then met for play dates etc.
also I would recommend looking at local groups to join, or any local events that you can take her to?

Does he go to nursery, or toddler classes?

I do get it i lived on a huge estate growing up and all the kids played out all day every day everyone knew everyone. Now I live on a main road in London and no kids play out at all and no kids on my street. Just the ages are too different your daughter will be bored and won't be on the same level as a 1 year old so the mum probably doesn't want an additional child to look after as not like they will be off playing together. How about clubs? Gymnastics? Etc

I didn't think of peanut!!! I'll look in to that, I am
Considering starting her at a local dance
School only issue it's only got a 9am start and she really Struggles to get ready on time but hve enquirer to start in Oct as it'll be good to do it early out the way and over winter.

Most of the local groups are at times/days I can't do which is frustrating but I had looked in to many of those but I'll def keep checking back.

Sorry she does attend nursery 4 days so getting
Kid interaction just feel terrible in the evenings at wknds when she wants to play and I get it and we're not at a siblings house with their child/ren for an hour to take that guilt away, I may and could arrange to see friends I do have with sim age kids late afternoon but most of us are whacked by then anyway too so could we cope with 2-3 of them going mental! Can't win! 😮‍💨

Perhaps I need to meet up on wknd later afternoons like fo house swops for tea time play dates rather than daytime ones, perhaps around age 4.5 that'll be a bit easier when she's also started school and making friends too...

Thanks a lot all feeling better already I jjsy hit a wall of worry and felt so worried she'll be lonely!

As a kid I had abs no play dates or any kids
Over ever when I was a child, mum just didn't do it! But we were latch key kids allowed out from age 8 at 9am as long as bk by 8pm and came bk for lunch all was good, I have no issue letting her play out from age 8-9 so long as sensible and I will move home for better chance of more kids if needed for her.

Jjst makes it's harder not having siblings or cousins it really does we have to do so much to ensure she isn't too lonely at wknds xx

My only child goes to a great after school club because where we are kids don’t really play out after school but the ASC play out in the playground in all weathers (if they want to) and even in the dark with torches.
weekends we meet up with other families & he has foootball and swimming lessons so he sees other kids every day.
it’s more structured than my childhood but asc is “free play” as far as it can be.

Wait till they start school, no rush for play dates

@museumum I think I need to take on your approach, this would work for us and who knows where it may lead as they get older. I don't think my mum has this same worry I have at all but perhaps knew come 8 we were
Allowed to make our own way more and tbh i abs loved that freedom!! I think 4-8 I jjsy need to get her on to a local club, do the after school club and perhaps do some wknd later afternoon things with friends and their kids,
Luckily I do have a few good mates I see once a month each so we do do things x x x I think I was spoilt as a child as had an annoying sibling max we hated eachother and hardly talk now but went to my step cousins most wknds or from age 12 was out with my school mates so I just have to remember from age 8-9 she'll start making her own way x x

Are there any parks near to your house? I had an only child (now grown up) and we were in exactly the same position. There was a park within easy reach of our house and I made sure to go there whenever we had a spare moment at weekends, after nursery and even in the early evening.

I found that we would see the same families and we soon got to know them. In fact there were many families, who we would never had met without going there. It was like going on an instant play date, without the hassle of having to arrange one.

@Mayim we do yes, our house is literally 60 seconds from it, it is tiny, so some days it's packed and it's geeat if you get a good bunch who play well for an hour so that def helps but we do have a couple of families who we've noticed are hard pushed to speak to so I have avoided if if they're there and sometimes we go and no one passes. Tbh I think I'm realising well def have to consider moving elsewhere in the near future. Where I lived as a kid we had a big down park abour 10 mins from our house,
Wasn't allowed on my own there until age 10 as meant crossing a very busy main road bir spent from 10-16 down there! It was kid central and was brilliant for me as a kid and I think she def needs this facility esp being an only as friends will be so imp to her as she also needs many friends if she can so she can start to work out her surroundings etc xx